Ivanka Trump the 26-year-old daughter of Donald and Ivana Trump is back on the market. And unlike another certain heiress we know, Ivanka is STD-free and runs her own mortgage empire. (Read: She’ll buy you a Wii.) Page Six reports:
We noticed Trump – who had been dating real estate mogul and New York Observer owner Jared Kushner for almost a year – was flying solo at a few recent soirees, and friends of the couple confirmed yesterday to Page Six that the power couple are no longer together.
I don’t think many of us common Joes stand a chance. Ivanka’s probably looking for a guy that’s A.) super loaded. and B.) has testicles made of Faberge eggs. Sadly, mine are only lined with diamonds. God, I suck.
Photos: Getty Images
edamame | April 2, 2008 at 1:56 pm
skank.
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | April 2, 2008 at 1:56 pm
I dunno… it would be too much like fucking her dad…
edamame | April 2, 2008 at 1:57 pm
She needs to adjust the girls…one is waaaay more pushed up than the other.
jumpin_j | April 2, 2008 at 1:58 pm
I’ll date her if she stops glowing.
julu | April 2, 2008 at 1:59 pm
she needs to hand out with taller people so she won’t have to hunch to look shorter. in the end, she still looks like a mammoth, only now she looks 7 months pregnant
Most Beautiful Woman in The Universe | April 2, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Wonder if she would have entered the Miss Universe Pageant had she NOT been the daughter of its owner.
She has the height, the smile, the face. And she is in the right age group
Just lose about 25 pounds – she would be perfect
mixedmartialartvideos.com | April 2, 2008 at 2:00 pm
i wouldnt feel bad pulling her hair
gurnion | April 2, 2008 at 2:10 pm
I’d make her an un-wed teenage mother
Shep | April 2, 2008 at 2:12 pm
How does something that hot come from donald trumps genes.
cookie7 | April 2, 2008 at 2:14 pm
not interested.
lil ol me | April 2, 2008 at 2:15 pm
Hello everyone! I’m new to this site. How’s everyone doing today? These stories are hilarious…
FRIST!!! | April 2, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Her nose is disturbing..
Son of Gerald_Tarrant | April 2, 2008 at 2:24 pm
I would make sweet sweaty sexy love to her bank account.
The Laughing G-d | April 2, 2008 at 2:28 pm
@11 good and welcome
You know, from coming out of Trump’s flesh sack… she could look a lot worse… a lot worse. I am going to go ahead and give her a smiley, because that is a genetic quagmire she had to wade through. Good for you Ivanka, good for you. :D
Expatte | April 2, 2008 at 2:29 pm
I cannot believe Tinsley Mortimer’s picture is on The Superficial…. my worlds collide….
Rebecca | April 2, 2008 at 2:30 pm
26? Sure it’s not *3*6* ? She looks kinda old…
veggi | April 2, 2008 at 2:32 pm
bet she sucks dick for coke.
yeah, got nothin..
what the fuck is britney doing??
shameshame | April 2, 2008 at 2:34 pm
no matter how hard she tries, she’s still ugly and looks like her gaudy father.
Pixie | April 2, 2008 at 2:36 pm
I think she’s pretty and smart, but her nose has really changed a lot over the years.
Are you sure she’s 26? It seems like she’s been 26 since I was a little kid.
Son of Gerald_Tarrant | April 2, 2008 at 2:36 pm
Veggi, BritBrit’s dad put her ass on lock down. That dick must not have known how much people need her around so we can all say “it could be worse, I could be Britney.” I’ll bet TMZ is laying off people without Brit on the street.
veggi | April 2, 2008 at 2:40 pm
That’s right G_T.
Damn him! I’ll bet she’s going insane without her barefoot gas station bathroom trips..
Ray | April 2, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Praise the lord she looks like her mother.
gigi | April 2, 2008 at 2:41 pm
she on the pill or something? she’s looking slightly more zaftig & womanly than normal…. very nice look for her, but I’m sure some highly critical person in her life is reminding her daily…
Son of Gerald_Tarrant | April 2, 2008 at 2:45 pm
I think Brit’s dad is working for Al-Qaeda. Osama bin Laden is probably paying him to keep his daughter from sleeping with all of his sleeper cells.
gia | April 2, 2008 at 2:49 pm
she is so pretty! is she wearing green contacts here though?
hate you for no reason | April 2, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Fake veiny boobs….yick.
kc | April 2, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Her boobs look real and I bet she shags like a minx.
Yo Momma | April 2, 2008 at 2:56 pm
AWSOME!!!!!!!!!! Definitely sperm donating material.
bb | April 2, 2008 at 2:57 pm
There is NOT ONE person on this site (me included) that she would fuck. Wishful thinking everyone.
nipolian | April 2, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Ivanka Trump her from behind in the worst possible way.
sweets | April 2, 2008 at 2:59 pm
who the fuck is shorty
FRIST!!! | April 2, 2008 at 3:01 pm
God, slow news day? This chick’s boring! And 26? Riiiight…so am I..
Ted Mosby | April 2, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I’d ride her like Seattle Slew in the Derby
lester | April 2, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I see she has not fixed those uneven breast she bought in South America.
When will women wake up and realize that nobody want to be married to a babe with fake breasts. Small is OK fake isn’t.
Auntie Kryst | April 2, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Overheard during Ivanka’s conception:
“Ivana my partner in business and life, befitting the Trump brand name, my seed and your egg are going to merge conceiving the classiest, swankiest, high-end child New York’s ever seen. It’s going to be lean, tall and with gold trim. We will spare no expense to ensure it is the envy of all in its class. When it grows up it will only court or be courted by the most powerful, wealthy and esteemed possible mates. In a word, it’s going to be fabulous. Now get on all fours, I don’t want you looking at me…I fired!!”
Sauron | April 2, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Sadly my testicles aren’t made of Faberge eggs.But the head of my penis is the Koh-I-Noor diamond.Is that allright as well?
C. Commander | April 2, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Yo buddy it’s ‘couple IS together” not “couple ARE together”
Al | April 2, 2008 at 3:19 pm
Hmmm… While flipping through channels the other night I caught a segment about a lady whose new implants were uneven. The doctor pushed on the higher-riding puppy a couple of times and it seemed to pop into place! I wonder if Ivanka would let Dr. Al take a crack at her high-riding righty? It doesn’t hurt to ask, right?
gotmilk? | April 2, 2008 at 3:25 pm
3, that’s because it’s a botched tit job, not a bad bra.
Lowlands | April 2, 2008 at 3:27 pm
She doesn’t care about Fabergé eggs and diamonds.She only cares about the inside lol.
havoc | April 2, 2008 at 3:39 pm
I don’t know. I’m kinda digging on the blue veins on her tits.
They match my eyes and balls……
.
roastbeef | April 2, 2008 at 3:51 pm
She and Brooke Hogan should get together and compare their manly features.
ph7 | April 2, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Some idiot said: <>
That’s the first investment I made when married: bought myself some funbags to play with.
HAHAHA | April 2, 2008 at 4:21 pm
@ 30 HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA Brilliant-
I think she’s really pretty and presents herself very well…but, I’m a chick so what the hell do I know.
Trover | April 2, 2008 at 4:28 pm
She is hot, but the mental and emotional baggage of her being a Trump will never go away. Her father will make sure you know that he is richer, fatter, taller, has better hair, banged more chicks, and will do anything you ever want to do better than you ever would. So yeah, she has that going for her.
Clem | April 2, 2008 at 5:22 pm
I don’t care if she has false teeth – she’s gorgeous.
Scientologist | April 2, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Guys, Donald Trump Hates the Environment:
http://digitalfuntown.squarespace.com/dft-blog/2008/3/31/short-shorts-earth-hour-time-lapse-2008.html
gryphon50 | April 2, 2008 at 9:25 pm
I think for being Donald Trump’s daughter she seems pretty normal and nice….At least she works hard and doesn’t act like a constant attention whore like Paris Hilton. I’m somewhat mystified as to how Donald Trump is her father since she seems ok.
Evil | April 2, 2008 at 9:56 pm
She looks… unpleasant
Anal Fistula | April 2, 2008 at 11:58 pm
she’s so hot that i don’t even mind that daddy is the Donald. also, she seems shockingly level-headed and intelligent…much unlike her douchetard greasebag older brother