It’s Your Mother

Cranberry and vodka in the morning. Now that’s good rehab.

Lindsay Lohan has reportedly been receiving threats from a stalker causing the Betty Ford Center to ramp up their security, according to TMZ:

Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ Lindsay has been receiving harassing phone calls and text messages from unknown numbers — and the unidentified person behind them has been making disparaging statements about her recovery … and her family.
Even scarier, the unknown person is saying he/she knows where Lindsay is staying and is watching her.

In related news, spilling gin on your phone apparently makes you sound like a goddamn serial killer when you’re simply trying to call your daughter to ask where she hid those credit cards from you. “No, I’m not a stalker. This is your mother. Now tell me where the AMEX is or I’ll visit you in your sleep, young lady. MUAHAHAHA! – Do you like that laugh? I think it makes me sound mysterious. Like Kim Cattrall, she’s so sassy.”

Photos: Pacific Coast News