Fox News reported awhile ago that Isaac Hayes didn’t quit South Park and never issued the press release saying he was offended by their Scientology episode, but rather left the show after suffering a stroke. Now Page Six is claiming the press release was actually put out by other Scientologists, saying:
That release was put out by fellow Scientologist Christina “Kumi” Kimball, a fashion executive for designer Craig Taylor. According to foxnews.com, “Hayes loves ‘South Park’ and needs it for income. He has a new wife and a baby on the way.”
It’s surprising Scientologists haven’t kidnapped the President and blown up a box full of kittens yet. Looking at the way they conduct their public relations, their next step should be reworking their name into an acronym that spells out H.A.T.E. and maybe trying to launch a nuclear strike against all the promoters of freedom and democracy.
UPDATE: If you missed last night’s episode of South Park featuring the return of Chef, you can check out a clip here.
*UPDATE: Isaac Hayes was on the Opie & Anthony Show in December last year and openly said that he had no problem with the way Matt and Trey handled the Scientology episode. You can listen to the clip here.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | March 23, 2006 at 2:54 pm
First Post! Bwaa haa!
Another example of how crazy these Scientologists are.
not-one-of-you | March 23, 2006 at 2:54 pm
ok, will believe Isaac’s version that CoS issued that statement without his knowledge or consent, but if Isaac does not quit Scientology *now*, then that is his own tough $h!+.
CoJo | March 23, 2006 at 2:55 pm
Anyone catch South Park last night?
Not sure if it was new or not, but last nights S.P. episode had chef getting kidnapped killed by a “club” that he was brainwashed into joining. eerie.
ReportingLive | March 23, 2006 at 2:58 pm
Ok what the hell is going on?? There is basic info that’s missing here, and someone needs to clear it up!!
a) Is he in hospital or is he not in hospital?
b) Did he quit the show or not?
c) Did he write the damn release or not?
IF he didn’t why the hell wouldn’t someone in his camp speak out sooner if he was unable to himself???
So many questions……………
veronica | March 23, 2006 at 3:00 pm
not to mention he chose to go back after the kids pleaded for him not to… then he fell onto a friggin’ pointy rock and got torn apart by a mountain lion and a bear… that’s rough, yo…
veronica | March 23, 2006 at 3:02 pm
if he didn’t quit… then that was one hell of an episode… made me cry a bit… i loved chef… :(
Sister Morphine | March 23, 2006 at 3:07 pm
I think it’s time we kill the Scientologists.
? shhexycorin ? | March 23, 2006 at 3:09 pm
He’s just been stroking his salty balls a little too often.
veronica | March 23, 2006 at 3:09 pm
#3
It was Episode 1 of the 10th season… I loved the “cut and paste” voice clips.
Lala | March 23, 2006 at 3:16 pm
Forget Luke Wilson, I think Isaac Hayes should play Bobby Ewing in the new Dallas movie.
*Isaac Hayes announces to press he’s offended by South Park Scientology episode, leaves the show, media uproar ensues, Ton Cruise goes apeshit, Mattt & Trey fight back, Isaac says he actually had a stroke, never issued a press release on leaving, gets booted from the show anyway, all down to one wacky fashion-designing Scientologist”
And then everyone wakes up and it was all just a dream…
snark | March 23, 2006 at 3:19 pm
wtf? did he quit or not? did he have a stroke or not?
MeganHarris | March 23, 2006 at 3:21 pm
Friggin’ hilarious.
angusparvo | March 23, 2006 at 3:25 pm
Poster 4; the reason we’re not hearing anything from Isaac is because he’s being tightly controlled by a Scientologist “minder” right now. As is Katie Holmes; nobody ever gets a word with her anymore without her “minder” being present. With the current media attention to South Park and Isaac, I’m sure the Scientologists are all over the man right now. I hope Matt and Trey devote the entire damn season of South Park to exposing Scientology.
CheekyChops | March 23, 2006 at 3:33 pm
When will they all wear Nikes and drink the juice? Surely its time.
bone_daddio | March 23, 2006 at 3:46 pm
total bullspit
Lipgloss Assassin | March 23, 2006 at 3:49 pm
I think we’re taking our eyes off of the real threat here, folks:
Thetans. And, and Xenu.
Seriously, let’s nuke the bastards.
Spindoc | March 23, 2006 at 3:50 pm
If they can prove the church was behind it, BOTH South Park AND Hayes have a nice fat lawsuit against them, Oh God, PLEASE let the church have been behind it. Oh yeah, Tom Cruise loves the cock.
djyuckfou | March 23, 2006 at 3:50 pm
essh scientology this , scientology that – there like the new paris hilton!!
Praz | March 23, 2006 at 3:56 pm
Forget the wife and baby, I bet Hayes needs the money to reach level 14. It probably costs like a million dollars or something.
BTW I found it ironic that someone named “Christina” is a Scientologist. That is all.
hafaball | March 23, 2006 at 3:59 pm
Damn it you bastards, why not show the whole thing? I don;t have a TV. I had to sell all my things so I could buy a computer, which then got stolen, so I had to kill hobos, steal their organs…….I mean..that was funny.
Mobbo | March 23, 2006 at 4:13 pm
hafa you steal organs too?? i have a friend that does that….
eutychus | March 23, 2006 at 4:21 pm
bunch of crap, hayes quit cause of scientology; “we made the scientology episode thinking, this might make isaac hayes quit, and sure enough, he did” from trey and matt’s interview on letterman
http://www.devilducky.com/media/43368/
SuperSpence | March 23, 2006 at 4:34 pm
It’s a shame the Scientologists weren’t around when the Romans were feeding people to lions.
bjpack | March 23, 2006 at 4:42 pm
It’s too bad the South Park episode didn’t include a comment about the king of all “Super Adventurers” living in Bahrain. That would have been funny.
BarbadoSlim | March 23, 2006 at 5:18 pm
this is freaking bizarro, I’m speechless, you can’t make this shit up folks, you just can’t.
Kelly | March 23, 2006 at 5:18 pm
So chef got killed off in this episode? How sad, too bad cause he was the only character to bring diversity to the show. Now it probably will be so vanilla.
gogoboots | March 23, 2006 at 5:29 pm
See, I know he had a sense of humor, Scientologists however, are still fucking WACKO!
whackjob | March 23, 2006 at 5:34 pm
#26: are you OOYFM?? “..only character to bring diversity….so vanilla”.
It’s effin SP.
Between the rightous superficial and some of these posts I laugh myself stupid. Wait, I am stupid, so I laugh my self….whatever.
christee | March 23, 2006 at 6:14 pm
they still have tolkein.
discreet_chaos | March 23, 2006 at 7:37 pm
I believe the whole thing was a publicity stunt by a couple of hack cartoonists. I’ve seen and heard several interviews with Issac Hayes and he’s never said anything against SP.
He had some health problems in January and a mysterious “statement” is released with a derogatory quote from the cartoonist already attached. Everyone just repeats the same snippet and as far as I know, nobody has seen or posted the entire statement.
Then, there’s some nonsense about Tom Cruise and everything is perfectly timed to happen days before the release of Season 7 on DVD and the season premier, which happens to have a “bye Chef, anti-scientology theme”. From all reports, the mysterios statement was released on the 13th; What? Does anyone believe they put together Wednesday’s entire episode in a week?
krisdylee | March 23, 2006 at 7:45 pm
This doesn’t explain why the hell Matt and Trey said what they said!!! Who is hiding what? And really, do I fucking care????
Rutty | March 23, 2006 at 8:08 pm
“What? Does anyone believe they put together Wednesday’s entire episode in a week?”
Actually, 6 days… they need a day to ship to broadcasters.
Kimberly | March 23, 2006 at 8:13 pm
Uh, it’s widely well know that they put most episdoes together in four to six days- Which is how they are able to do so many satirical episodes on current events.
bjpack | March 23, 2006 at 9:17 pm
I heard that next week’s episode has already been completed and it is about post #30 in this thread.
TaiTai | March 23, 2006 at 10:22 pm
Scientologists killed JFK!!!
jaderaid | March 23, 2006 at 10:26 pm
discreet_chaos (post #30)
South Park episodes are usually compiled within about 4 days and sumbitted to Comedy Central about a day before they air. That is why they are able to have such up-to-date information. For example, the ‘Christmas in Canada’ episode portrayed Saddam in his spider hole within days of the acctual event.
a concerned fan | March 23, 2006 at 10:29 pm
Who did the voice at the end? Trey?
a concerned fan | March 23, 2006 at 10:30 pm
Who did the voice at the end? Trey?
jaderaid | March 23, 2006 at 10:37 pm
The guy who did the voice of Darth Maul, Peter Serafinowicz, did the Darth Chef voice.
URalllosers | March 23, 2006 at 10:55 pm
I don’t get any of this, but I do know that scientology is totally true. I feel sorry for those of you who haven’t secured your high rank in the system. The shit is going to be bad for you when it comes…
ThatWeirdChick | March 24, 2006 at 12:11 am
This is just straight fucked up.
Rrks85 | March 24, 2006 at 2:41 am
God I love these guys. Trey Parker and Matt Stone are just awsome. Kudos to them all the way. This is something from the “Scientology kills” website. I thought it was funny. I want to make a shirt that says “Hail Xenu!” who’s with me?
While the “South Park” creators didn’t directly comment on Comedy Central’s decision to pull the episode, they issued an unusual statement to Daily Variety indicating the battle is not over. “So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!”
The duo signed the statement “Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu.”
http://www.scientology-kills.org/celebrities/cruise_news.htm
discreet_chaos | March 24, 2006 at 2:55 am
I don’t know, if they wrote the sentence from the “statement” nobody has seen, or if Page 6 is correct and it was written by the LRons. I do know that the Parker & Stone have shown no loyalty to someone that they worked with for years and other than possibly themselves, the person who put in the most appearances promoting their show.
I also find it interesting that SP fans are willing to take the implied info from the cartoonists, innuendo and stuff being whispered around the blogosphere at face value, while they’re refusing to accept any denials or information from any other source.
I haven’t regularly watched South Park, since it stopped being funny and I have no feelings about scientology. I am a longtime fan of Issac Hayes and I guess you could also say, I believe in truth and fair play.
sid | March 24, 2006 at 4:34 am
Take the test. It’s insane:
http://www.scientology.org/oca.htm
I went to the scientology website and took the free personality test. They say it has a value of “$500 and up.” Shit, if you’ll believe THAT, you’re ripe for the whole deal. Don’t fill in the info form at the start with your own real info.
They REALLY DO ask the questions Stan got asked. Basically, the test is a set-up. It exposes all our collective NORMAL foibles, and labels all as “depressed.” You are given a graph of your test, but not the final results. You are directed to the nearest Scientology centre to get your results from a genuine madma
DevastatorX | March 24, 2006 at 4:54 am
Fuck Chef. I hope he never makes another cent off the south park name.
Hypocritical (Racial expletive)!!!!!!!
Spindoc | March 24, 2006 at 12:10 pm
#43 Discreet Chaos…
No, what they did is take a has been with no career and give him a roll on one of the highest rated Cable shows on TV. During that time he participates when they bash every other religeon out there, then bolts when they bash his. As for who showed loyalty It sure as hell wasn’t him…..and Tom Cruise loves the cock.
gogoboots | March 24, 2006 at 12:22 pm
Hey that clip wasn’t the whole episode, WTF?!?
lebowski | March 24, 2006 at 12:33 pm
#44, your post does rule. Want me to read your palm for $500?
BTW, I read an article on Scientology in Rolling Stone (yeah….what?) and it was deeply disturbing. People who want to quit being a Scientologist end up losing their entire families. Aliens have always scared me.
scientology must die | March 24, 2006 at 2:55 pm
Bombard this person. Scientology is truly evil as is she.
http://www.our-home.org/christinakumikimball/
discreet_chaos | March 24, 2006 at 2:59 pm
#46 Spindoc
Issac Hayes has worked steadily since the early 70s and he took a one-off appearance on South Park and turned it into a multiyear gig. He’s also won numerous awards, including two Oscars, two Golden Globes, a Grammy and a Screen Actors Guild.
Matt Stone has only done a couple of things, other than South Park and has been the proud recipient of a Cable ACE and a Annie. If he really did receive a resignation letter that used the reported phrasing, he didn’t have to call the media and make a remark about cashing checks, he could’ve just cited creative differences.
I still don’t know, whether or not a statement exists and Page 6 may be right and an LRon may have put something together; But, it’s the cartoonists and their unquenchable desire for publicity that have turned this into a big deal. There has been no argument that Mr Hayes has had some health problems and he is 63 years old. He has released no public statements or made any recent appearances, it’s the cartoonists that have been riding it for all it’s worth.