‘I’s Gonna Murry You in My Berkini.’
These are shots of Britney Spears and Jason Trawick scoping out the chapel at their hotel in Maui yesterday which seems to have set off the “Britney’s Getting Married” alarm across the entire gossip circuit. Now some of you might be wondering, “Is Britney really stupid enough to get married again?” Which is, of course, the wrong question and not just because the answer is “Unbelievably so.” No, the real question is, how the fuck is this legal? She’s still under a conservatorship which means she technically can’t even sign her own marriage license without her dad’s co-signature making this thing a weird-ass arranged marriage. No, really, this Jason Trawick guy is essentially marrying a retarded person trapped in a questionably attractive body and everyone’s okay with this? We’re just gonna let his happen? Christ, at least when she married Kevin they were intellectual equals. Intellectual equals that someone forgot to neuter, but equals nonetheless.