The Crap We Missed – Thursday 8.29.13

August 29th, 2013 // 290 Comments

“Internet perverts, TO ME!!”

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed featuring the most depressing back-to-back shots of Baywatch stars you’ll ever see. Unless I successfully outbid Steve Hirsch for the rights to the sextape The Hoff made with a McRib. Then we’ll be in business, sexy, mustard-covered penis busine–Woah! What the hell? *grabs keyboard away from Fish* Ok, where was I? Right, crap pics, why does the back of my head hurt and why do I taste pickles? It’s probably nothing. Here’s Leonardo DiCaprio claiming the Captain Douche title, which I honestly can’t believe didn’t go to either of these two, and we’re way past due for a sad Jason Segel meme.

Here, I’ll get it started,

- Photo Boy







 

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    Princess Lay-off-the-drugs-&-booze-&-all-you-can-eat-buffet.

  2. Kirsten Dunst Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Where… behind those enormous tits?

    How’s the sarcasm coming through?

  3. Alexandra Paul Armpit Stain Riddick Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, I’d be sweating up a storm, too, if I knew I had to spend the next 2 hours sitting through yet another p.o.s. Riddick movie.

  4. Irina Shayk Bikini Beach Bunny Swimwear Campaign
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll take two. What’s this for now?

  5. Irina Shayk Bikini Beach Bunny Swimwear Campaign
    Commented on this photo:

    Make that three.

  6. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    help us, 3D CG Mo-Cap.
    you’re Princess Leia in slave costume’s only hope.

  7. Sad Jason Segel Meme Miley Twerk
    Commented on this photo:

    If only…

  8. Michael Bay Transformers 4 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “Are those rainclouds? Shit. How am I gonna get a girl to wash my car in a bikini tonight if it’s raining?”

  9. Leonardo DiCaprio Blue Slippers Lukas Haas Fedora
    Commented on this photo:

    “Leo, let’s get out of here. I think Danny Glover just spotted me.”

  10. EL James Cleavage See Through Shirt Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    When you have to look up to Stephanie Meyer in terms of both writing and looks it’s time to triple Lindy off a bridge.

  11. Natalia Borges Panty Flash Upskirt Gravity Premiere 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve never felt more like a Morlock.

  12. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Nevermind. I’m definitely an Eloi.

  13. Bill Murray Bloody Bandage On Forehead The Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    What happened to Bill Murray’s face? It doesn’t matter! IT JUST DOESN’T MATTER!

  14. Adam Lambert Jared Leto Terry Richardson
    Rosa Tralee
    Commented on this photo:

    Ghostbusters IV: Gozer vs. Jesus

  15. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “We don’t carry evening gowns that large, Ms. Fisher.”
    “Ah hell, just roll me up in like a big fuckin’ satin burrito and break out the staple gun.”

  16. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini On Top Giant Rock Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    JUMP…JUMP…JUMP!

  17. Pamela Anderson Nipples See Through Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Pamela Anderson has GREAT genes…I mean, just look at how good her grandmother looks in this picture!

  18. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Luuuuke! I’m yer fath…. siiiiister.

  19. Alexandra Paul Armpit Stain Riddick Premiere
    r diggity
    Commented on this photo:

    Riddick-ulous pit stains

  20. Simon Cowell Baby Mama Lauren Silverman Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Damn these sweaty man hands!”

  21. Jason Segel Scooter Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Dad always said “scooters are like fat girls, they’re alright to ride around on until your friends catch you on it”.

  22. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini On Top Giant Rock Instagram
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Jump you insufferable little pig!”

  23. EL James Cleavage See Through Shirt Chateau Marmont
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    A hot girl does not need to write such a book.

  24. Natalia Borges Panty Flash Upskirt Gravity Premiere 70th Venice International Film Festival
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    The latest fashion accessory. Paste on pubes.

  25. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is the buffet over there?”

  26. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini On Top Giant Rock Instagram
    Grafikman
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s the Kraken when you need it?

  27. Kirsten Dunst Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit girl, I’m serious. I said throw some collagen in those lips!

  28. Milla Jovovich In Bodybag Cymbeline Set
    Mumbler
    Commented on this photo:

    Do you see what happens, Paul Anderson? Do you see what happens when you find an actress in the alps? This is what happens, Paul! This is what happens when you feed a stoner scrambled eggs!

  29. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini On Top Giant Rock Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    For a girl whose said she has body issues, she’s awfully quick to show it to us. All the time.

  30. Kate Hudson Cleavage Legs I Wish I Was Here Set
    Lily
    Commented on this photo:

    Ohhhh… His pecks are a teeny bit bigger than the package.

  31. Kate Hudson Cleavage Legs I Wish I Was Here Set
    broduhjenner
    Commented on this photo:

    I feel like her knee has more cleavage than her boobs.

  32. Natalia Borges Panty Flash Upskirt Gravity Premiere 70th Venice International Film Festival
    nick belane
    Commented on this photo:

    Does the carpet match the drapes? Who knows because I am pretty sure that is hardwood flooring.

  33. Ed Sheeran Hot Chick Backseat Hooray Henrys
    Commented on this photo:

    Gingervitis.

  34. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere Bill Shatner is laughing his MF’in ass off.

  35. Robyn Davidson Old Uma Thurman Tracks Photocall 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    So much for aging gracefully…..

  36. Pamela Anderson Nipples See Through Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Is it sad that every time I see a picture of her now, all I can think is; “Yo, Ma! Can we get some meatloaf!?!”

  37. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    She better be careful. I think that’s the thing that killed Tasha Yar.

  38. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “Luke I am your grandmother”

  39. Michael Bay Transformers 4 Set
    jennablon
    Commented on this photo:

    The Fonz is looking pretty good these days. I guess Richie needed some more makeup though?

  40. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “Aren’t you a little short for a…oh fuck it.”

  41. Jason Segel Scooter Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    I can get 70 miles to the gallon on this hog.

  42. Simon Cowell Baby Mama Lauren Silverman Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    She stole that shirt from Simon.

  43. EL James Cleavage See Through Shirt Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    That explains a lot.

  44. Jason Segel Scooter Chateau Marmont
    ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    He has been pulling chicks with this bar mitzvah swag since he was 13.

  45. Jamie Foxx Joe Biden 50th Anniversary of the Martin Luther King I Have A Dream Speech
    Johnnybreakdance
    Commented on this photo:

    Wa-wa-wait. Did you just say Biggie was better than Tupac?

  46. Lindsey Gort Butt Cheetah Print Skirt The Carrie Diaries Set
    Ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn!

  47. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Can someone get this red carpet out of my way?

  48. Carrie Fisher Shiny Robe Dress 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t worry everybody, George and his crew will fix it and give her a new body for the Special Edition release in a couple of years.

  49. Pamela Anderson Nipples See Through Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    NEXT!

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