I Want YOU to be The Superficial Banner Girl

June 29th, 2010 // 45 Comments

Apparently a shocking amount of you were attached to the blonde girl who used to adorn The Superficial banner at the top of the site (Note to Self: Invent fuckable clip-art.), so since she’s been wrapped up in the big shower curtain in the sky, I thought it’d be fun to make some lucky reader the Banner Girl for an entire week and let you guys pick her. Because who doesn’t love letting people see how hot you are? — Says the anonymous, faceless blogger.

Here’s How to Enter:

1. Take a side-profile shot of yourself in the style of our seductress up top. (Note: Being naked will not guarantee you a winning slot. — Or will it?)
2. E-mail your name, city and photo to CONTEST CLOSED. Entries in the form of discount Viagra prices will be immediately disqualified.
3. Don’t die of anticipation.

Submissions will stop being accepted Monday, July 5 at 11:59 EST. From there, the Top 20 Entries will be open to voting starting Tuesday, July 6 to Sunday, July 11. In the meantime, keep checking The Superficial on Facebook where I’ll be posting photos daily of our lovely contestants who, so help me God, better not be my mother.

Best of Luck and May the Hussiest Hussy Win.

[Legal Stuff: By submitting a photo you acknowledge you're the legal rights owner of that image.]


  1. PunkA

    Of course we were attached to the other girl picture. It was Lisa Dergan, and she is one of the top 5 hottest playmates of all time, and still is smoking hot and a fine piece of ass. Bring Dergan back, you POS.

  2. I’m sure you’ll get some hot chicks, but prepare yourself for dreadful images “Fish”.

  3. MSK

    PunkA, I always wondered who she was, who is the current one? Scarlett?

  4. ThatsReallyADude

    I’m so going to get dolled up and win this contest. Then when I am on the site, I’m going to post: “That’s me, and I’m really a dude.” Then you are all going to feel gay.

  5. Ann

    I vote Randal.

    • Ann you always take my breath away yet leave me ready to bang you senseless. I am so greatful for your support in this years running for The Superficial Header Girl but I must decline your admission. Ann my balls have sunk far, far to low pulling the skin on my face below the threshold for sexiness. Even my tangled grey pubes can’t hold up the giant old cannon balls between my legs.
      Ann let us both join with the other fans of this site in hoping for a fresh new face to click on while our poles are lubed up.


  6. Richard McBeef


    I will flood your email box with pictures of my cock and of my balls.

  7. its me fuckers

    lol you sneaky bastard. You just want fresh pictures to wack off to.

  8. Gene

    …and the bonus for the winner is – you get to bang the host! Dude, drugs are easier and cheaper.

  9. Bert

    Good idea, but be careful with your eyes, you might see some unfortunate things (putting it mildly) and it might be good if you have a get out clause if only uglies post their pics. :D

  10. mandiesaurusrex

    i hate my profile. so i’m out.

  11. Rough&Roses

    Who ever you pick is a Rough hater. I will personally put her through the ringer who ever she is…

  12. I would but I don’t have the ass for it…

  13. Covert Koala

    What I liked about the original was that she looked a little stuck up, but ready to blow you in the men’s room to piss off her boyfriend. The kind of woman who will put on a nice dress to get back-doored.


    Oh boy here’s my chance!! I MUST try out for this!!

  15. Fumus

    Current picture is Shakira? AmIright?

  16. tenthirteen

    Bring the superficial girl back! but this contest thing might just be the next best thing….! so we’re cool!

    • Cock Dr

      I come here to get my bitch out, and the world is better for it.

      • Cock Dr

        How much PhotoShopping is allowed? I would need to do a little something about the 6 chins & the fireworks accident scarring.
        Does the site discriminate against gingers? We’re people too goddammit!

      • Ann

        Would I have to shave my beard or could that be shopped out?

  17. stinky mcpoop

    My vote is for Amy Winehouse. Because she’s ugly.

  18. fetusmcnuggets

    i have a killer profile and pretty huge lips

    too bad ur only into blondes

    pshtttttttt superficial = hater muffin deluxe


  19. ShaniaJones

    I loved the old girl!

  20. barroom hero

    i’m sure he is receiving a full assortment of amateur pornographic images…


  21. captain america

    ……………look & be like kim kardashian.

  22. re@v.rt

    Jut revert to the old header, it was WAY better.

  23. jacobc

    WHO is the Girl in the Picture now????
    I always thought it was Hayden Panettiere, the Girl From Heroes,
    Her lips look the same,

    Actually, I like the new picture A lot more than the old one,
    And I Am REALLY sad that is going to be changed,
    if it is changed then i hope is a brand new girl, and not the old picture

    WHO is the girl from the pic now?

  24. Michelle J

    Why not just send a pic of Katy Perry and get this thing over with?

  25. parker

    my guess is that half of those photos, and probably the half that are hot looking, are just copied from some website.

  26. Jo

    Can’t believe I sent a photo…daddy issues **nods head**

  27. dee

    I will send a photo just because I want fish to perve on me!

  28. tkumarr

    Oh Boy ! She is charming and I would love to see her as thesuperficial Banner girl !!

  29. nene

    what is the price??

  30. celebstar

    My friend, I have always followed this site from blogs. I also included the same zamanad http://celebstar.org his blog. Do you make the best of everything. Awesome

  31. Kaz

    U nasty dirrty what are u talking about

  32. Slig

    Iam slig more handsom

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