How is she not stabbing people?

March 22nd, 2010 // 159 Comments

And the love affair with gas stations is back.

Here’s Britney Spears stopping for a Fanta over the weekend while brandishing probably the hardest nipples I’ve ever seen on her. Seriously, it’s a goddamn miracle no one lost an eye and I almost started screaming “SHE’LL PUNCTURE A LUNG!” at the woman stupid enough to snap a picture three inches from Britney’s face. Had that lady been holding a burrito, it would’ve been the equivalent of waving a raw steak at a lion clutching a spear in each paw. You don’t even fuck with that.

Photos: Fame

  1. The Listener

    #96 LOL

  2. Gueibor

    @79: Come on dude, that wasn’t even proper French. Try harder.
    Oh, and arigato, Ishi-San!

  3. Rasputins Liver




    …could be we’re gettin’ closer to seeing our beloved Pink Wigged Fake British Babblin’ 5150 Britney back?!


    Oh gawds I hope so! Would make this summer such a treat to be able to jump onto the net, some cold ones already down the gullet, to be able to read some daily criziness by the trainwreck of all trainwrecks.


    That year prior to her being hauled off smiling, laughing and babbling away in the back of the EMT rig were really the tabloid’s best times. She really was the bomb then when it came to total whackjobness.


    ………………………………C’MON HOME, 5150 BRITNEY!!!………………………………


  4. Dee

    Why?! Why are her tits always point downward? That is not right.

  5. cc

    Speaking of which, when are the world powerlifting championships?

  6. pat

    they are fake nipples, you can buy them in shops. that’s why they keep moving around all the time.

  7. That lipstick looks gaudy. @ 74 it does look like overdone makeup on an elderly woman.

    @ 4 – “At least she is wearing shoes this time.”
    That’s what I was thinking. She’s making real progress!

    @ 94 – “She’s clearly getting back in shape. Look at the muscles in those legs.”
    I’m starting to wonder if this is just a genetic anomaly or something. Like Jessica Simpson…looks like she runs up stairs with weights all day, but Jessica’s belly is about to explode out of her top.

  8. Man, I dont know what it is, but she still does it for me

  9. IKE

    #108 I’m with you.
    I love these nipple shots. Won’t get a complaint from this direction.

  10. Tony Blair

    Picture 12 she glides. Is there a video of them bouncing.

  11. Mal Gusto

    Damn you, penis. Why do you want the things that will kill you? I know it would be a terribly itchy and kinda stinky mistake, but I would nail her if I could. BTW, my 47 year wife has nicer tits.

  12. Nipples!!!detectors………….

  13. Mr. Nice Guy

    Based on this-
    She looks much better without the Bra.

  14. Nice titties. She looks a little on the heavy side though. She’s clearly getting back in shape. Look at the muscles in those legs

  15. soap

    another publicity stunt by fanta

  16. JoeyMontego

    I love that she wears what ever the fuck she wants to and many times that means no bra. I know I don’t speak for all men but Britney is so much sexier than the supermodel types. Her nipple errection stifness level is of the charts. Her legs are so meaty!

  17. trisha_ann_glynn

    Because a body of Fanta and a cup of coffee are not sharp objects.

    In 2008 the over-eating comments were relevant and funny.
    Now her sexy shape and her career is returning.
    The “five minutes ago” comments sound more like sour grapes.

    Now if she can actually dump, trailer trash meth head Kevin Federline.

  18. trisha_ann_glynn

    Britney Spears, this is your mission should you choose to accept it.
    Fill that body with more WATER less Fanta.
    More PROTEIN, less nicotine.

    Your legs look great. Of course that might scare away insecure, jerk-offs.
    But that is the risk we all have to take sometimes.
    Now start preparing for that cage match with Lady Gaga!

  19. I still don’t understand who lets her leave the house looking like that. If you can’t convince her to wear a bra, could you at least have the decency to let her know her nipples are pointing in different directions. Maybe put some tape on those bad boys to keep them aligned. And after having two kids how does she still have perky boobs? I’m impressed with that. Usually they go south after having kids. Maybe that’s what she’s showing off.

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  25. @92 sorry it must have been deleted! So I look like an ass. It was originally another uggs/sport shoes/whatever ad.
    I actually enjoyed the “Madame Du Traillier-Parque” comment, and I agree with your sentiments about the usual “I’d hit it,” but it wasn’t #75 when I posted my bitch-out.

  26. Also, I’m having a hard time understanding why a girl with her means doesn’t have her handlers BRING HER ANY FUCKING BEVERAGE SHE DESIRES! I just can’t believe someone in her stratosphere of income can look so pedestrian.

  27. One more thing…I’m on a roll here…

    The way she holds up the UNOPENED fanta orange is quite unnatural, no? Could this be “product placement” by our friends at the coca-cola co? They know there will be cameras….just a thought….it happens! In fact, this answers my previous question. She didn’t have someone get it for her, cuz there would have been NO PICTURES TAKEN!!! Ahhhhahahahhahaha

  28. britney!She wears a pair of ugg boot

  29. Jessi

    omg that was soo freakin funny im really LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

  30. That is hilarious. She’ll never look the same again.

  31. That is hilarious. She’ll never look the same again.

  32. John

    shes throwin up the shocker in #3…who holds something like that

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  34. Blech

    She needs to sleep. The caffeine isn’t going to help her. And she looks like she needs to hydrate as well.

    Other than that, Britney’s still cute as a button. She just needs to regain her health and look alive.

    As far as the headlights are concerned, my nipples are so sensitive, they “light-up” the damn same way at the mere hint of a breeze, even with the most supportive sports bra on. So embarrassing…

  35. hey My man
    this is thank you.. :)

  36. I’ll drink my fanta:) And I was

  37. You are my coca cola in 1000. I was der

  38. I’ve seen better heads on a stale glass of beer

  39. anabel

    what a white trash…

  40. she maybe also crazy.

  41. best wishes to you

  42. Thank you for your sharing.

  43. Thank you for this post

  44. Oh,,,So clear show to me…is not good for me..I will love it but could not get it : first welcome to MY shoes online store:

  45. she looks crazy

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