We’ve been having some serious server issues which is responsible for no less than all of the following: site not loading, comments not going through, multiple comments being posted, me not being able to post, and me wanting to kill myself. We’re still trying to get things fixed but our tech guys have no idea what’s going on. Apparently computers are made up of microchips and circuits these days and shaking them violently isn’t the fix-all solution you’d think it’d be.
Holy server problems, Batman!
August 1st, 2006 // 65 Comments
 |
Courteney Cox's Shocking Confession About Her Sex Life – Huffington Post |
 Why Was This Celebrity Booed Off This Hit TV Show? – Fox News | |
| 50 Most Scandalous Cheerleaders in Sports History – Bleacher Report | |
| Skinny Star in a Bikini Talks About Being Anorexic – Evil Beet Gossip | |
| Sasha Grey keeps doing it for the kids. – TMZ | |
| Kate Middleton Steps Out On Her Own – Lainey Gossip |
SoftBlueGlow | August 1, 2006 at 5:06 pm
I thought computers were cardboard boxes full of delicious BLT Sandwiches…?
http://www.VeryLiberating.com
Grunt Big | August 1, 2006 at 5:06 pm
sECOND!
gatorbates | August 1, 2006 at 5:09 pm
It happens. I happen to be having some problems now too. With my bowels.
CMonster0125 | August 1, 2006 at 5:13 pm
I found that if you kick the computer down a hill, it learns real quick and does the job right.
huhwah | August 1, 2006 at 5:14 pm
I wonder what good ol’ Mel would say about this?
bitmanip | August 1, 2006 at 5:15 pm
OMG what am I going to do at work now???!!!
http://www.exposay.com
LatinGossip | August 1, 2006 at 5:16 pm
I had the same problem last week. At least you don’t have herpes.
You don’t have herpes right?
Strano | August 1, 2006 at 5:19 pm
I haven’t noticed any double posts
Strano | August 1, 2006 at 5:19 pm
I haven’t noticed any double posts
UNWASHEDMASSES | August 1, 2006 at 5:22 pm
No shit.
LL | August 1, 2006 at 5:26 pm
IT’S THE JEWS!!! If they will start wars, what won’t they do?
Crush a basket of kittens, pimp out sweet little Lindsay Lohan for pocket change, fail to praise the brilliance of Mel Gibson’s movies… their perfidy knows no boundaries. If batshit crazy religious folk say it, it must be true. I’m boycotting bagels and The Daily Show.
Just kidding. They will have to pry the bagels out of my cold, dead hands and The Daily Show just cracks my shit up. I gots to have it.
mrs.t | August 1, 2006 at 5:42 pm
You just turn it off, count to ten, then turn it back on. Like with the first-generation Atari system. Which is what I use for a computer. I stenciled an apple on the side of it and reconfigured an old Pianosaurus for the keyboard.
huhwah | August 1, 2006 at 5:51 pm
Ransom starring Mel Gibson is starting on Cinemax soon. Im going to enjoy it.
Sarah Silverman is one sexy as hell Jewish babe who has sugary tits and makes makes me laugh.
Im so confused!!!
If I ever have to choose between the two of them I will choose the Jew. Ive heard she swallows.
Italian Stallion | August 1, 2006 at 6:02 pm
For some reason my laptop keeps barking at me. It kind of sounds like my dog’s when they have to go out. Oh, shit, it was the dog’s. Damn……..I need to stop smoking this shit………………*taking dog’s out*
ImSuicidal | August 1, 2006 at 6:04 pm
#12 PIANOSAURUS… …Ha Ha Hahahaha HA!
Adult Underoos | August 1, 2006 at 6:08 pm
#13 — i agree, sarah silverman is totally hot
Binky | August 1, 2006 at 6:12 pm
I began to notice tech probs at this dump when multiple posts from that pervert ‘Binky’ turned up on the WRONG thread.
Then again – maybe it has something to do with drinking in the afternoon.
Berrylicious | August 1, 2006 at 6:16 pm
Come on! Hurry I need my fix!!!! Give it to me!!!!!
Hopeless_Screenwriter | August 1, 2006 at 6:19 pm
@ Mr. Fish: How fun is this a post telling us we might not be able to post and yet here I am writing this and posting for perhaps no other reason than to post. I may be the most inconsequetial waste of sperm in the entire universe!
mrs.t | August 1, 2006 at 6:22 pm
Why did i need to click on ImSuicidal’s link. With 2 young daughters in the room-yipes.
biatcho | August 1, 2006 at 6:23 pm
Superficial – I’m pretty sure most of your issues are stemming from the super-gay ad that keeps popping up for Five for Fighting.
Get rid of the gay = get rid of server issues.
and get rid of jews too while you’re at it, wink, wink, nudge, nudge hummina hummina hummina
mrs.t | August 1, 2006 at 6:24 pm
Oh well, they have to learn about anal sex sooner or later. They are going to RULE the bus stop this year.
Hopeless_Screenwriter | August 1, 2006 at 6:25 pm
Here I go again typing and typing and typing meaningless gay shit just to type type type. Don’t kill yourself, kill me. Don’t shake your computer shake me. Still typing. It’s like my fingers are on gaylicious autopilot.
Hopeless_Screenwriter | August 1, 2006 at 6:26 pm
If your are going to get rid of the gay’s you can start with me.
Hollus | August 1, 2006 at 6:28 pm
First gofugyourself.com, now The Superficial.. WHY OH LORD WHY??
mrs.t | August 1, 2006 at 6:31 pm
It’s not the gays or the Jews-it’s Flava Flav.
biatcho | August 1, 2006 at 6:31 pm
hummina hummina hummina, because you know that I know, that you know, that I know, that you want to fuck me in the ass, so when I bend over, staaaaart fuckin!
Hopeless_Screenwriter | August 1, 2006 at 6:36 pm
@27 Hay there biatcho my boy, why are you standing there bent over with your pants down to your ankles. No problem. Hummina hummina hummina.
jrzpussie | August 1, 2006 at 6:43 pm
Holy ass-piper problems, Batman!
Maybe you can get your tech
guys over here to try to break
apart Hopeless and Biatcho, I
think Hopeless has his dick stuck
in Biatcho’s ass. Does anyone
have a bucket of luke warm water
we can pour over them? It worked
with my dog.
ImSuicidal | August 1, 2006 at 6:47 pm
#19 _Screenwriter, I don’t understand why you’re Hopeless? You are one hilarious sum bitch. You should try writing screen for that “Seinfield” show or that “My Cousin Raymond” program. Send in your resume here: http://www.monster.com/ Who knows, you may get lucky!!
@20 I’m really sorry about corrupting your daughterses moraleses. ← ←(plural)
PS The link is for Justin Igger.
S mack | August 1, 2006 at 6:48 pm
MySpace and Rotten Tomatoes have had major server problems too, like full-blown site meltdowns.
mrs.t | August 1, 2006 at 6:50 pm
#30-No apology necessary. It just saves us time on the answer to “But what were you and Dad DOING?”
ImSuicidal | August 1, 2006 at 6:58 pm
I know, 3rd comment in less than an hour, but I have to ask “theSuperficial”, whose lips are they in the photo???
lambananas | August 1, 2006 at 7:03 pm
#30 Do you need a towel to wipe the cum off your face after that grand display? My god can you suck Hopeless’s cock any harder? Is there anyone on this site that is not a complete fucking pole-smoker?
scrooge | August 1, 2006 at 7:08 pm
They should feed the hamsters.
Tha-Flash | August 1, 2006 at 7:17 pm
WTF… sort it out!
Fuck
Shit
Bitch
etrp | August 1, 2006 at 7:24 pm
hey, you also have some kind of a problem with registering new users.
I couldn’t activate my old account and when I tried to make a new one – it wasn’t activated either.
LL | August 1, 2006 at 7:34 pm
Senator Ted Stevens (an expert on the Internets) says that some of the tubes are blocked with dirty pictures of pole smokers, stolen music and movies and e-mails about Mel Gibson and how much he hates Jews and gays. Imagine how much he hates gay Jews. And if you’re a gay Jewish woman, well…. watch your back, is all I’m sayin’. If you hear incoherent babbling, RUN!!!
krisdylee | August 1, 2006 at 7:54 pm
when my computer acts up, I either flash my titties at it, sit bare bummed on the tower, or slip that mousey right on in my panties….
Works EVERY time….
henrysgirl | August 1, 2006 at 8:06 pm
Mr. Superficial, you silly boy! Don’t you know you’re supposed to shake babies, not computers, to get them to behave.
penguinwaddle | August 1, 2006 at 8:10 pm
It’s probably the wrath of God you are feeling on your computer cos he’s probably sick and fucking tired of looking at all the Lindsay Lohan posts…I know I am.
azcoyote | August 1, 2006 at 8:26 pm
#39… Please consider me your new computer… And I act up a lot…
Fucking Riot | August 1, 2006 at 8:31 pm
Community Leaders Outraged Over Porn Video
Pleasant, NC — Outraged community members are mounting an aggressive campaign against an X-rated videotape available for rent at Pleasant’s video store, claiming that the tape does not contain the “Spectacular All-Anal Action’ promised on its cover.
“Are we as citizens expected to just sit back and tolerate this sort of garbage?” asked Pleasant School Board president Edwin Thistlewaite during a protest at City Hall. “I paid to see chicks getting fucked in the ass, and that’s what I want. I think I speak for all decent Americans on this matter.”
“This is false advertising, plain and simple,” agreed area resident and mother of two Janice Ferguson, speaking before an assembled croud of more than 1500. “My husband and I have both viewed this piece of trash, and believe me, it barely shows bush until 20-minutes in– a far cry indeed from the ‘Non-Stop Carnal Cum-ucopia’ touted on the box.”
Over cheers of agreement from the crowd, she added: “Is this the sort of hardcore pornography we want in our homes? I think not! I say the people of Midvale county deserve better!”
Though the controversial video, ‘Butt-Fuck Sluts Go Nuts Vol. 29′, contains some graphic depictions of anal intercourse, the citizen’s group asserts that it does not come close to living up to its box’s claim of a “Two-Hour, Wall-2-Wall, Deep-probing Ass-Flesh Fuck-Fest.” The group is demanding the inclusion of significantly more explicit prurient material before it will relent.
“I rely on Dvd’s like this to provide me with vicarious, onastic anal thrills I crave,” dentist and anal pornography enthusiast Dr. Mark Ferberger told reporters. “I stroked myself for over an hour, and I barely even got it up once. Where’s the stuff I can really pump my meat over– the double penetrations, the all-lesbian strap-on dildoing, the spread-eagled, six-finger bend-overs? That’s what I want to know? …There are what eight or nine chicks in this movie and maybe two of them take it in the ass, tops.” ….
Lunita | August 1, 2006 at 8:46 pm
Hi I
YoMamma | August 1, 2006 at 9:06 pm
hey Lunita. You can type all the letters to your words here.
Acronyms are ok though.
TCLTC
sovay | August 1, 2006 at 10:18 pm
this is the funniest post up in a million years
penguinwaddle | August 1, 2006 at 10:19 pm
Hey Lunita,
U R:
2 kewl
2 B
——-
4 gotten
Nikky Raney | August 1, 2006 at 10:26 pm
thank god. i thought people were actually being idiots and posting their comments 10 times in a row.
Nikky Raney | August 1, 2006 at 10:27 pm
thank god. i thought people were actually being idiots and posting their comments 10 times in a row.
Nikky Raney | August 1, 2006 at 10:28 pm
thank god. i thought people were actually being idiots and posting their comments 10 times in a row.