Here’s Lindsay Lohan’s Definition of ‘Not Partying’ For New Year’s Eve

January 2nd, 2013 // 69 Comments
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On Saturday, Lindsay Lohan‘s “friends” (Read: The blonde who clearly just puked in her own purse up top.) told TMZ that she’d be having a nice, quiet evening at home for New Year’s Eve to make a good impression on her probation judge. Which she did provided the judge’s idea of a good impression is watching a convicted felon flee the country and get shithammered drunk for the last 48 hours of 2012. I hear they prefer it. “Mr. Smith, it appears you decided to show up promptly to your hearing and obey all laws since we last met. Where do you get off…

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    I dreamed a dream in time gone byyyyy… Shit, I’m jus’ as good an actress as that Anne Hath’way. Look, see, I can prove it, I’ll show the world my cooch…”

  2. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    lalaland
    Commented on this photo:

    fist yes i mean fist

  3. Jack Ketch

    And Dina Lohan’s version of “I have NEVER partied with my daughter,” and “Lindsay is clean and sober!” Two used snotrags that the world could do without, thank you. Utter garbage.

  4. I wonder… are the children in strollers (“prams” in London, I guess) safer from Lindsay’s vehicular reign of terror because she’s driving on the left side of the road? How does her coke-addled brain deal with the switch? Are the Brits too smart to let her operate a motor vehicle? So many questions so early in the new year…

  5. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    caryn
    Commented on this photo:

    This looks like Charlie Sheen in Logan drag. Amarite?

  6. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    MILF
    Commented on this photo:

    “Goodbye, career.”

    • Jimmy

      To be fair, she never really had much of a career to kiss goodbye. Seriously, until very recently she was usually refereed to as “Herbie Fully Loaded star Lindsay Lohan”. That was the most popular movie they could reference to try and remind people of who she is.

      • Veronika Larsson

        Actually, it’s “Mean Girls star Lindsay Lohan.”

        Mean Girls was released in 2004.

      • When they were referring to Lindsay’s role in that Disney movie, I think they were putting the emphasis on the “Fully Loaded” part. Maybe the “Herbie” part, too.

  7. Arlene

    Why do the Papparazzi keep chasing down Emma Stone’s relatives? They are private citizens, for Christ’s sake. Leave her Mom and Grandma alone!

  8. Cock Dr

    More money to be made when they hire out as a mother-daughter tag team. The uber rich and kinky are always looking for a new sexual novelty act….just make sure to lock up all the vaulables before they arrive.

  9. Veronika Larsson

    Lindsay and her Mom made a huge mistake in Lindsay’s “career”: they should have married her off when she was younger and less, erm, “worn”, to a very wealthy older man (with no pre-nup or a very favourable one).

    But that train has sailed, as Austin Powers once said. And let’s face it, the Lohans are not capable of thinking that far ahead. You know that old saying, live each day as if it were your last? This is what that advice looks like when actually implemented.

  10. zomgbie

    hey dina, havpny nroog ryeerah!
    wooo!!!!!!

  11. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture looks like when you throw old Polaroids of your ex into a fire and they start to melt.

  12. Rapsutin's Evil Twin

    Let’s see, her birthdate is July 2, 1986. she’ll turn 27 this July, but we may not have to wait til then to start the Forever 27 Club countdown.

    Face it, folks, this will not be pretty. Now, who wants popcorn?

  13. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sir, excuse me, do you know how much coke these old Playstation wires can get me?”

  14. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    Can anyone tell me which one is drunk off their face and which is stoned as shit due to high levels of coke consumption?

  15. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Livinus Nwambe
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a busted-up Trina Michaels in this shot.

  16. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    Shrunken Dina Lohan Head Accessory sold separately.

  17. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    She is Claymation. That’s the ony way to explain this photo shoot.

  18. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “You know what really grinds my gears? This Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan with all those little outfits, jumping around there on stage, half-naked with your little outfits. Ya know? You’re a… You’re out there jumping around and I’m just sitting here with my beer. So, what am I supposed to do? What you want? You know, are we gonna go out? Is that what you’re trying to – why why are you leaping around there, throwing those things all up in my, over there in my face? What do you want, Lindsay? Tell me what you want? Well, I’ll tell you what you want, you want nothing. You want nothing. All right? Because we all know that no woman anywhere wants to have sex with anyone, and to titillate us with any thoughts otherwise is – is just bogus”

  19. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    One
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy. Shit.

  20. What an idiot

    So… white oprah’s daughter, who has been in rehab 7 times and is still fighting her addictions, decides she wants to go out drinking on New Year’s Eve, and who accompanies her? Why, white oprah, of course; they both get shitfaced falling down drunk, which is sure to impress the judges in her upcoming court cases. Can you say “DUMBFUCK ENABLER”?

  21. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    gab
    Commented on this photo:

    Wynonna Judd is that you??

  22. I wonder if they have a mother/daughter escort special? That might be fun and interesting.

  23. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    LOSER>>> GO TO JAIL….

  24. “Lindsay, I’d like to introduce you to Amy Winehouse.”

  25. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    Check out her mom in the background trying to navigate a sidewalk…

  26. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, Lindsay, put your left titty into my right hand…”

    “Oh, you silly man, I couldn’t possibly…could I?”

  27. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and doing it this way you never lose even ONE drop!”

  28. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “Just push out a little like you’re trying to poop…it’ll go in much easier that way…”

  29. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    I simply LOVE seeing Lindsay Lohan all dolled up and dressed to the nines…

  30. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “Thank you for helping me out of the car, except who in the fuck ARE you?”

  31. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “Look, buster, I let you ass fuck me in the back seat, and you were nice enough to help me out of the car, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to dance with you.”

  32. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    EEEWWWWWWWWwwwww… I don’t think my dick would even like to see that coming…

  33. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    “You can’t tell I’ve been drinking, can you?”

  34. anonym

    Lindsay is such a boner shrinker now, and she spends too much time around her mom

  35. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    After so many repetitions, Lindsay just assumes this position by reflex when she gets invited into a club.

  36. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Juch
    Commented on this photo:

    “You balls must hang this low to enter.”

  37. anonym

    Mom and daughter now look like sisters.

  38. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    fucking hideous face.
    I want to slap it with my dick

  39. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a lost cause. I feel the end drawing near.

  40. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Kisses4Katie
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck are the old av wires for? Did she steal an old ass console to try to pawn?

  41. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Danny
    Commented on this photo:

    whatever she’s on i want some

  42. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Danny
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s on a Good one. share?

  43. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    I find Dina quite sexy wearing this outfit while she is drunk. I would have liked to see her fall on her nice ass.

  44. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    I want Dina’s coat and dress that she is wearing.

  45. she’s not fooling anyone. says she doesn’t drink?? why the fuck does she look wasted all the time

  46. Whenever I see Dina wearing this outfit, I really want to fuck her for some reason.

  47. quest

    Sister Ali though not. Why she whores Lindsay, Ali no whores. What Ali does: better for Lindsay no Dina for Lindsay better for Ali with because she doesn’t do stuff with that Dina is doing bad.

  48. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Commented on this photo:

    Dina is quite a fucking sexy lady when she is drunk

  49. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Perhaps we could hurry this along. Someone give them grain alcohol, so they can just get it the hell over with, and I don’t have to watch it on TV anymore.

    (Holy shit, I’m a dick. Ah fuck it, Submit it is.)

  50. Lindsay Lohan Drunk Dina Lohan NYE
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Meh. The more I look at these pictures the more I just feel pity for her. Her life will not end well.

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