Heidi & Spencer honeymoon in Mexico. Yes, that Mexico.

April 28th, 2009 // 84 Comments

Because Jesus prohibits the learning of natural selection, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are honeymooning in Mexico this week. Turns out there’s some sort of influenza going on down there. Maybe you guys have heard of it – everywhere. Anyway, they had some free time to call in to Ryan Seacrest this morning which is exactly what I’d be doing with my fake-breasted bride on my honeymoon. If a stingray ate my penis. People reports:

On a “pre-honeymoon” in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, the pair are “wearing face masks everywhere we go. We’re in isolation, we’re in full hiding,” Pratt told Ryan Seacrest on his KIIS-FM radio show Tuesday morning.
The couple, who held a wedding Saturday in California, went to Mexico for Montag to shoot a music video.
With the outbreak of the flu, which has so far killed 149 people in Mexico, the couple is being extra cautious. “Every second we’re washing our hands,” Montag told Seacrest.
“Since it’s a recession,” said Pratt, “we just might go to Santa Monica Beach.”

Dear Mexico,

Mucho dinero. Muerte para los diablos blancos.

The Superficial

superficial

  1. mikeock

    I’m sorry, but who, exactly, are these two goons?

    Oh … FIRST, losers.

  2. Geoff

    He’s such an idiot, his tie still has the store tag attached (last pic). I really hope they get influenza and never come back.

  3. Mike Hawk

    Just like him to bring a pig to a swine flu party…douche

  4. Ummmm……..just exactly are these huge breast?

  5. I CALL LINDA A WHORE IN THE BODY OF THIS MESSAGE

    Oh yeah these two will last forever. How long until Spencer realizes he’s young and needs to try out some more Vag before doing some dumb shit like this.

  6. Zanna

    Great. Now Horseface Heidi is in Mexico creating another hybrid strain of flu. It will be Equine & Swine. Swiquine.

  7. Lettusaurus

    I don’t care what you all say. I would wreck that chick. Her body is smoking.

  8. daguz

    fuck you for constantly reporting on them. fuck you. fuck you.

  9. wishing real hard

    With any luck they wont be allowed back…

  10. sirrix

    Thrice in one week. Fish, you’re a douche.

  11. whoa

    Hahaha…does the stupidity ever end with these two?

  12. KG

    I hate both of them, but that dress is very hot.

  13. lizzy

    UGHHH it drives me INSANE that they give each other such LAME kisses!!!! if they’re so in love and all that bullshit, can they at least kiss each other like they are? they kiss like fucking 5th graders playing spin the bottle, it’s PATHETIC!

    it just proves (to me at least) that they are full of fucking SHIT and probably aren’t even married, dating, together, whatever, and never have been. they are just two morons who like to get paid lots of money to put on a show for the tabloids.

    hate hate hate hate.

  14. sam

    #14 — hate hate hate hate.

    Well said, Lizzy.

  15. Barrack Obama

    I will do everything I can to go up against those who still deny the holocaust, such as these creeps: http://holocaustdenialvideos.com/

  16. rupert0

    god the fucking damm u are stupid .. Mexico City has and outbreak .,.. CABO SAN LUCAS in BAJA HAS 0 reports of swine flu cases..

  17. b

    She is sooooooooooooo HOT!!!

  18. tigerbaby

    She’s like, 25 years old and already has gnarled old lady hands.

    Sad.

  19. ok

    could these two being and dumber? a recession huh? since when did the recession have any effect on no-talent reality stars? mtv is still paying them, what a moron.

  20. sarah

    He’s already not wearing his wedding ring!?

  21. ok

    typo – could these two be any dumber?

  22. ok

    typo – could these two be any dumber?

  23. Speidie Die

    Wait, isn’t this their 3rd “marriage” to each other? Certainly their 3rd “honeymoon”. Oh, yeah, and what about their April Fool’s day prank- the immaculate conception “pregnancy”?
    I hope that the old story of “The Boy Who Cried Wolf” comes true, and we don’t ever hear about them again- even if they sprout wings and fly to Mars.
    These two publicity sluts probably went to Mexico on purpose, believing it would get them more air time and photo ops. They would go to the opening of a can of Spam, if it got them in the tabloids.
    I hope these wretched creatures go into “isolation” forever. Preferably with each other. Then the rest of us don’t need to be troubled by them. God knows they deserve each other…

  24. They’re lives are so scripted, I wouldn’t doubt it if they’re “honeymooning” at an MTV set somewhere.

  25. I will bet my left tit that Spencer is a homicidal maniac, who, as a young boy, would murder innocent woodland creatures and keep their hides in a shoebox under his bed. Every once in a while, he’d take them out and masturbate with them, calling them Mommy.

    Now, if he murders his twatwaffle of a wife, then, well, there just might be a god.

  26. Randal

    Thanks to The FISH for responding to my request to continue posting about Heidi & Spencer, the two of you are my favorite!

    May you continue to enjoy the company of each other during your special moment in Mexico. Be safe and stay away from the locals.

    Randal

  27. gosyco

    Does a black dress trump an empty cranium?

  28. @26

    Dear Randal,

    Please join these two in Mexico.

    Love,
    Everyone on the Superficial

  29. Shockalator

    In that last pic, you just know he is asking, “I have to put my tallywacker in where? Ewwwww…gross!!!”

    P.S. I hope they’re both french kissing every fukking pig they see.

  30. JPRichardson

    She’s an idiot but has a SMOKING HOT body.

  31. MightyD

    #8 #10 #13 i5

    DIE!!!DIE!! U STUPID USELESS DICKLESS TWATLESS BRAINLESS BLOND MOTHER FUCKING RETARDED DOUCHES!! DIE!!DIE!!YOU GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING STOMACH TURNING UGLY BUTT FUCKING IDIOT WASTE OF HUMAN FUCK’N SKIN SCIENTO FUCK’N MORONIC DESIGN LOVING PIECE OF SHYTE!!!!!!!!!

    …and FUCK YOU PHISH!

  32. Edna Bambrick

    #8 has been reported.

  33. Edna Bambrick

    #31 has also been reported.

  34. MightyD

    Kiss the inbred incest blond twin couple Edna…and my left nut. Regards.

  35. Chatham

    Why did she bring her Trapper Keeper on her honeymoon?

  36. Beans Baxter

    Someone rub a pig on them

  37. swine flu

    They need to be detained in Mexico and never let back in the country. Nay, the public. Don’t want the swine flu being spread to more people, right? And whatever happened to the Heidi/Spencer ban? Please reinstate it.

  38. Maria Gomez

    Dear Superficial Writer,

    Gratis. Con mucho gusto.

    Atte,
    México

  39. --

    Gorgeous dress!

  40. sarah

    Bet he’s going to return his shirt and tie after the evening’s over.

  41. Photoshop Police

    Fish… as a representative of all who hold your refusal to stop posting the douchebaggery of the speidi with contempt….

    WE QUIT YOU!
    SERIOUSLY!
    WE MEAN IT!
    WE’RE LEAVING.
    NOT COMING BACK.
    FOREVER!!!!

    (see you tomorrow)

  42. Speidie Die

    #’s 24, 25, 35 &36-
    Bwaahahahahaha!
    Hilarious!

  43. Rebecca

    Oh god, I’m dreading her getting pregnant.

  44. Speidi's future fetus

    #43 That’s OK, I’m planning to escape by week 12.

  45. Speidie Die

    Oh, and Spence-her’s tie with the tags still on it? That’s so he can return it tomorrow, and get his money back. That’s how Spence-her is planning to get richer. Soiling things that you and I may be next in line to purchase.
    Grotesque gargoyle goblin fucker that he is…

  46. Joe Blow

    Last photo:

    “What do you men you’re out of penis with zesty man-sauce? You call yourself room service????”

  47. Fuck U

    Dear Randal,
    Please die very soon.
    Dear Edna,
    Please shut the fuck up.
    Dear Fish,
    Please accept my heartfelt…Fuck You.
    Dear All Others,
    Please pray that those two assholes die in Mexico…I know I am.
    Sincerly,
    Fuck U

  48. dk

    This is FUCKING BS posting this shit man!

  49. Galtacticus

    I hope they have a great time.As long you don’t meet Mexicans it’s save to visit the country.

  50. asdf

    @7

    Yes.

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