Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt eloped

November 24th, 2008 // 84 Comments

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt reportedly eloped in Cabo San Lucas on Thursday November 20. The two exchanged vows, and Spencer, keeping true to his deep spiritual connection with Heidi, bartered his with Perez Hilton for some free publicity:

Heidi, from the moment you came into my life, I knew my life would never be the same without you. You are the light in my life like the sun to the earth! Your loving warmth makes me want to be a better person. Being with you, I feel complete. I’m honored to even be able to call you my wife. You are the most amazing, loving and caring woman on this planet. I will love you forever and always.

Wrapping up this post quickly, I should be honest and admit I bought these two a wedding gift. While taking personal joy in watching their last feeble grasp at relevancy, I couldn’t resist picking up a copy of “Phil Hartman’s Guide to a Successful Marriage.” May it guide Heidi and Spencer on their journey of love, discovery and, God willing, heated arguments with a loaded firearm handy.

Cheers.

superficial

  1. first?

    oh great

  2. Farhana

    Yuck!

  3. p0nk

    wait, today’s not april 1.

  4. lula

    all together now-WHO THE EFF CARES?

  5. LOL!!

    Phil Hartman… that’s wrong.

  6. wasnt he banned on this site? The second pic is priceless! he look like he just bathe in richard simmons douche water! nice woopsy leg!

  7. p0nk

    I now pronounce you Mr. & Mrs. Douchenozzle.

  8. easymilt

    eighth

  9. Jimbo

    She is HAWT!!!!!

  10. ChuckleHead

    That’s great.
    That is great news.

  11. veggi

    With tears in my eyes…

    So many nights I sit by my window
    Waiting for someone to sing me his song
    So many dreams I kept deep inside me
    Alone in the dark but now
    You’ve come along

    You light up my life
    You give me hope
    To carry on
    You light up my days
    and fill my nights with song

    Rollin’ at sea, adrift on the water
    Could it be finally I’m turning for home?
    Finally, a chance to say hey,
    I love You
    Never again to be all alone

    You light up my life
    You give me hope
    To carry on
    You light up my days
    and fill my nights with song

    You light up my life
    You give me hope
    To carry on
    You light up my days
    and fill my nights with song

    It can’t be wrong
    When it feels so right
    ‘Cause You
    You light up my life

  12. Rufus

    OMG, lets all hope they do NOT reproduce!

  13. Rachel

    You keep promising me no more Heidi and Spencer and you keep breaking that promise. You make me cry.

  14. Fourteenth

    Phil Hartman deserves better than to be associated with these clowns.

  15. Superfish tallied the #’s yet? i got this in the bag!

  16. Don’t tell me these two ass wipes are going to reproduce now? Can you imagine what butt ugly plastic little kids they are going to have??

  17. Randal

    Finally, some big, BIG news in the entertainment industry today with this announcement!

    Heidi, you entered the industry with a loud splash as your delicate ability to capture the TV audience was felt by all in their living rooms and on their couches. Your smile warms even the coldest heart in the darkest hour.

    Spencer, you’ve stood by your lady for years now, giving her support when it was needed the most and it clearly shows how much of a man you’ve become over those years.

    I want to wish the both of you the very best and offer you my congratulations.

    Randal

  18. Yea - blah blah

    Come on guys…

    You know she only married him to get into his ass……

    For reference see: Nick Lachey…

  19. michelle

    i hope they don’t breed anytime soon (or at all).

  20. B

    I thought there were to be no more Douche & Douchette posts? Was that not something that was promised? Explicitly?

    To wit: http://thesuperficial.com/2008/10/heidi_spencer_get_used_to_this.php

    And yet, every week, every fucking week, there is at least one post about the dipshit twins. These two have never once done anything newsworthy or even remotely useful or interesting, and yet, every week, there’s more pictures and some useless story about them not doing anything worth writing about.

    Seriously, do they pay you to post this tripe? Just say so, and I’ll understand. Otherwise, what the fuck?

  21. michelle

    i hope they don’t breed anytime soon (or at all).

  22. Pee Wee From Porky's

    I hope Jon Lovitz sucker punches you.

  23. Key

    Don’t joke about Hartman :’(

  24. ac

    You said no more speidi. you promised. Why have you lied to us so many times? Just tell me why! *uncontrollable sobbing*

  25. nsfnsf

    Honestly, as retarded as Heidi and Spencer (even if he’s a fag and the marriage is a sham) seem, and they do seem retarded, they are a breath of fresh air compared to some of the turds (Amy Winehouse, Madonna, LiLo, Brangelina, KK, etc.) featured as celebs here.

  26. pat

    another interesting comment by Randal, I admire his ability to put a positive spin on anything. I presume he’s being deeply cynical when he writes these – or maybe they’re just practice for his real profession. Advertising, PR, politics – lots of places where Randal’s skills are often used.

  27. Mike

    Rough Daddy, you are going to need a shit load more than $500 worth of Botax to make your face look good.

  28. What the hell?

    What happened to no more Heidi & Spencer posts? This is very disheartening.

  29. What the hell?

    What happened to no more Heidi & Spencer posts? This is very disheartening.

  30. B

    please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduce please don’t reproduceplease don’t reproduce….PLEASE?!!?!

  31. I wont win Mike! curb the jealousy,,,Rough Daddy is not family friendly…btw my mug is fine according to my mom!

  32. I wont win Mike! curb the jealousy,,,Rough Daddy is not family friendly…btw my mug is fine according to my mom!

  33. what the hell? how did double post happen?

  34. Amanda

    Oh wow, very distasteful gift! I love it.
    Maybe these two won’t be able to reproduce because they’re hybrids of horrible creatures, and sterile, like mules. Let’s hope.

  35. ummm...yeah

    Fish is a liar!
    Randal is an assclown.
    OMFG! What the fuck does it take to get rid of these two assholes once and for all??
    Fish you fuckin gutless wonder! Simple fag!
    NO MORE OF THESE TWO… WHO THE FUCK CARES????!!!!!!!!!!

  36. glace neuf

    i’d hit it, then cry.

  37. Nev

    I HOPE THEY DIE.

  38. Mike

    RD, That is what I heard, you have a face only a mother could love.

    @37, can they take Rough Daddy with them?

  39. jen

    ok seriously, what happened to the promises of no more spencer and heidi??? was that a joke? trying to lure us back in to the site? I’m so sick of hearing about these two!!!

  40. haha Mike=gullible

    Let me ask you something mikey! how come i never notice anything you write unless theres RD is in the sentence?

  41. Ian

    Someone PLEASE just kill them, they are so f’ing annoying.

  42. le fag

    believe when i say i can spot a queen anywhere anytime, and #40, you are sooooo a queen!

  43. CJ

    A joke about Phil Hartman? Low. :(

  44. I do you detect anything seating on a gaydar?

  45. LoLa

    Why couldn’t these horse-faced assholes be in that plane that injured Dumbass Barker and DJ Former-Fatso Stomach Stapled AM, and killed 4 of their friends? Why Why Why?????? But more importantly, why the fuck is Fish posting ANYTHING about these asstards?
    Who gives a shit if they eloped? Who gives a shit if they die? Who gives a shit that Heidi’s entire face is as completely fake as her “relationship” to this pube-colored moustache fag? Please, enough already.
    If they eloped, congratulations to the both of them. Tomorrow will be a better day. Because they’ll be announcing that they got divorced.

  46. youve come a long way huh “lefag” back in the days i wouldnt even type to you in order not to catch aids!

  47. Matthew

    @6 yes they are beanned but the fish keeps breaking those promises on those two Ass clowns.Please fish No more mr and miss douchebags on this site and also Who the hell care about them getting married! and a joke on phil hartman…low may the sprit of phil hartman haunt you superfish!

  48. Ananana

    the photo of spencer holding up the flag makes me want to cry :(

  49. fabu

    I think online dating is really nice. I meet many nice people at the millionaire & celebrity dating club ^^^^^^MillionaireLoving. C O M^^^^^^. You can find your soul mate at this site. You have many chances to date with a millionaire there.

  50. le fag

    #46, do you not realize “rough daddy” is a term used by fags? it refers to older men who enjoy having sex with young boys. douche bag.

    and thanks for the ignorant AIDS comment. you ought to be beaten for that disgusting remark.

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