Heidi & Spencer love America and confirm Lauren Conrad made a sex tape

April 29th, 2008 // 151 Comments

When they’re not busy posing for horribly fake photo shoots (I call this one “America: Ain’t We Retarded?”), Heidi and Spencer love to expose their Hills co-star Lauren Conrad as just as fake as they are. This morning, the couple dropped a bomb on Tyra (video after the jump) and confirmed that Lauren did, in fact, make a sex tape. Tyra asked Spencer if he actually watched it and he said he’d rather throw up making it the first time I actually agree with the douchenozzle. I’d rather watch a video of my vacuum cleaner humping my couch. I wonder what that would look like… *hunts for camcorder*

UPDATE: Okay, is it legal to marry a household appliance? Because, guys, I think I’m in love.

superficial

  1. bar room hero

    I am soooo sick of this slag….

  2. Schniffer

    why is she “not allowed” to elaborate? i sense lies….

  3. #17, that’s about right..

  4. Karmacidal

    I still don’t know who these people are – I only see them here and on TMZ.

  5. dude_on_a_wire

    Her affection for the lens has gone psychosis. I prefer psycho-chicks that steal husbands instead of narcissistic tendencies – Brit is an exception because she is bonkers on a whole other level – but Heidi – she tries way too hard and is now overdone.

  6. veggi

    I hate them with all my heart and half my liver..

  7. A

    she is the whitest women in the world

  8. dumb blondes!

    ughh, these people r idiots. this spencer guy is an idiot. who the fuck names their kid spencer anyway? and this heidi biatch had a childhood dream of becoming a hooker. but now she walks this dog around with her, as a prop in her photos! i cant wait till we hear the prattster coming out, and heidi confirming that she has rabies!

  9. Who is this and why is she on here …where is Prince Von A Hole !

  10. Who is this and why is she on here …where is Prince Von A Hole !

  11. Who is this and why is she on here …where is Prince Von A Hole !

  12. #57 pretty sure there is only one of her..

  13. Leeks

    DAMMIT I was happy to be living a country away from LA and these morons, and now I find out they’re here prancing around my city. Makes me want to vomit.

  14. If not for you, I wouldn’t even know these two existed. Thanks. Thanks a lot.

  15. tallytastic

    what is this crossed-leg pose?

    it looks like she has to pee really bad.

  16. Quinn

    they are confirmed idiots. Stop posting their pics on this site please!

  17. Harry

    Actually, I would like to see a Lauren sex tape. She may be a retard, but she’s cute. And what straight man wouldn’t want to see that. Now, a sex tape with Lauren and Heidi: that’s the home run.

  18. Cons_Fnd

    shoes legs shotrs bobos hiar face- are all workng 4 me. But th’ shotrs appear to be maternty.

    As hot as this gril is, it’s no wonder Spencer looks like an exhausted, rumpled hobbit all the time.

  19. Jamie

    I FUCKING HATE THESE TWO MORONS!!!! AN IDIOT AND A STRIPPER. HEIDI IS SO JEALOUS OF LAUREN’S SUCCESS THAT SHE PUTS HERSELF OUT EVERYWHERE EVEN THOUGH SHE LOOKS LIKE A DUMB BITCH. WE DON’T CARE ANYMORE!!!

  20. Michael Roscoe

    Both these morons need to realize no one would know who they are if it wasn’t for Lauren. The fact that I know who they are probably hurts my IQ.

  21. Racer X

    THIS IS NOT NEWS!!!

    /dude.

  22. sandra

    Even though I know nothing about their supposed “reality” show, I love Lauren Conrad for the simple reason that she seems to be blow-up girl’s nemesis. And she still has a real face.

    I hate these two more with each passing post. Mostly because despicable as they are, they seem to be having more fun than me, and probably a lot of you, too.

    At least we still have our dignity. Right?

    And who the hell has NOT made a sex tape? All two of you please rais your hands.

  23. Boatie

    America’s crappest couple!

  24. Boatie

    And Heidi looks chunky.

  25. sharpeidude

    This is why I know we didn’t go to the Moon.

  26. Chupacabra

    I swear, she has the look of someone who has never really *had* an orgasm… you know… like she’s just faking it? She couldn’t find her own g-spot… see, she doesn’t even know the alphabet, much less her own pleasure centers. Jesus Christ.

  27. Grunion

    The look in this horse- faced freaks eyes say “I would kill you all with my bare hands if meant I would be more famous”

    Concentration camp guards had more soul than this evil cunt.

  28. joes_garage

    Apparently you are unfamiliar with Frank Zappa’s epic “Joe’s Garage”. Song called “Stick It Out” is about making love to an appliance described thusly: “it’s a cross between an industrial vacuum cleaner and a chrome piggy bank with marital aids stuck all over its body” from the “First Church of Appliantology “. That should answer the age old question about marrying household appliances.
    Maybe we could get Heidi and Spencer to re-enact the song on a Hills episode.

  29. Chupacabra

    @48. 21st century digital boy … “They look like Ken and Barbie propaganda androids manufactured in a CIA lab.”

    …And Dick Cheney is laughing all the way to the bank… in his underground lair.

  30. Cpt Obvious

    Little bit of jiggling cellulite on her legs. Pass. Except the titty fuck. I’d still do that and come on her chin. Can’t miss that target.

  31. TheMoMo

    UNCLE! Enough of these two nonentities, please! At first they were annoying but still fairly cheesetastic…now they just make me want to bang my head against the monitor until the burned-in images of her fake tits, stilettos-with-everything “style” and gaping sex-doll mouth are drowned by the pain.

    Is it not enough that Paris Hilton is a “celebrity”? Do we really have to legitimize these two fucktards?

  32. ileana

    you can notice the slightest wrinkles of cellulite on heidi’s legs on the retarded pic of spencer holding her up

  33. swweets

    reminds me of my neighbor horrible vagina face

  34. Ted Mosby

    She says she knows for a fact and then is like I dunno.

    Still want to see the beef curtains.

  35. teamLauren

    lmao. i love how heidi and spencer are so milking this sex tape drama. that’s not even the half of it cus heidi wouldn’t even be freaken famous if she didnt meet lauren and now shes bashing her , probably to get herself more famous cus shes probably tired of being in lauren’s shadow. sucks how she has to get fame because of someone else. doesn’t really though cus she’s about to marry the moron of all moron and since she’s a fame digger, she’s marrying someone of her sorts. who really thinks spencer wants to marry heidi because he loves her or because she’s famous and he gets to be on tv? oh well, at least lauren’s going stay famous unlike this heidi while she’s getting her 10 mins of fame.

    by the way, why are their corny ass pictures posted everywhere. not like anyone really likes to see them but heidi and spencer.

  36. angela

    Why, oh why do you guys keep posting pics of these two idiots? Please stop giving them the attention they so desperately want. Maybe they will go away if you do so….

  37. Sam

    I hate this whore.

  38. vicente

    I think I would rather watch that sex tape than keep seeing pictures of these two morons.

  39. dizzle

    who keeps taking pictures of these people?

  40. NY Ted

    Air head or not…I’d plug Heidi’s holes with my dick like the little Dutch boy trying to plug the dyke!

  41. adaman

    i honestly think these two people deserve to get thrown in front of a train.
    GOD BLESS AMERICA.

  42. Sapphire

    That’s not cellulite that’s just her ass hanging out of her short shorts. You’re just mad that FINALLY a picture of someone with decent legs was found. It was difficult but it was done. We should applaud this accomplishment.

  43. hmmm

    Im not criticizing how amazing her legs look, but I think it is crazy that she is only like 5’3. Those pictures ( along with her heels) make her legs look sooooo long. In real life, she comes up to my nose.

  44. souper

    haha shes not wearing a bra…..awsome

  45. ldsqtbea

    love her shoes !!! :-D the shorts … yeah no

  46. hooplaaah

    uggh.. good fucking grief. -.-

  47. sameshitdifferentyear

    Someone should have given her a flag of Great Britain or France to hold instead.

    I swear, she would not have known the difference.

  48. Gabrielle P

    I’m so irritated by this couple it’s ridiculous. From the momment I saw her “Body language” video, i’ve wanted to straight up-punch her in the face. Ughhhh !! Lets hope she catches ebola and dies. Now that would be something to talk about.

  49. no1justminda

    Where were the aliens to blow up the White House THEN!? Geez!

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