Heidi & Spencer are ‘End Times’ prophets now

July 1st, 2009 // 147 Comments

After becoming social pariahs thanks to their shenanigans on I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Outta Here!, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have officially taken the final dive into full-blown religious hysteria. The two appeared on conspiracy nutjob Alex Jones’ radio show where Heidi talked about 9/11, Obama bringing on Armageddon and the evils of birth control. Via Jezebel:

I was just saying about birth control, because I got very scared about it the other day and I felt like God was telling me that this was something just created by the government that is really bad for my body and I was just getting sick, and I researched it, and one of the founding people who invented birth control said it was the worst thing they had ever done, they wished they’d never created it, how it morally corrupted society, it’s just sickening to him. How it devalues women, how it causes depression, how it can cause cancer, how it sterilizes your body, and what it does to your body, how most women are suicidal sometimes on it, and in fact, in order to even stabilize the population right now, each woman would have to have three children, that the population is decreasing so much that population control is just a myth.

At one point, the conversation turned to nightclubs that are allegedly having customers implant microchips in their hands to have access to VIP areas which, for those who don’t know, is what modern evangelicals believe is the mark of the beast:

“You would have to kill me before I get a chip, that would never happen. The fact that people are even already OK with this is sickening, I could throw up right now. A chip? are we dogs? Not even dogs deserve chips. It says in the bible that it’s the mark of the beast and that is a sign of worshipping the devil – so over my dead body would I ever get a chip in my body. My body belongs to Jesus Christ, to God alone, and no one will ever put anything in me, I will not worship the devil, I will not be conformed to this world, that will not happen.”

Somehow I missed the part in the Bible where Jesus spoke about the dangers of microchips. Must’ve been right after his sermon on the virtues of fake tits, posing for Playboy and drunken gun ownership. Yeah, that sounds like Jesus.

Thanks to Maggie who was, literally, the first person to write me who didn’t think I should spread the truth about microchips. Not even joking.

superficial

  1. WingWang - David Carradine's club-footed surrogate

    I can’t wait for the gangbang bukkake video with this tramp to come out.

    You know she’s a dirty little whore deep down inside….

  2. marcus

    she needs to shave that thing between her legs.

    Oh yeah, birth control has morally corrupted society. That explains why she whores herself out for cash.

  3. Pissed.

    It’s a pity they are such retards, because Birth Control is one of the shittiest most disgusting things ever invented, and they are right about half of it. But since it was those retards that said it, no one will be paying any attention and think it’s the best thing since sliced bread.
    No I am not happy about being the only sex to have to take these dangerous pills and be more at risk of breast cancer, and cysts in my ovaries, ectopic pregnancies, suidical depression, weight gain, constant bleeding, acne, dark hair sprouting all over my face and chest, and whatever else they cause that I am pretending to not care about

    But fuck off heidi, the world is never going to go for that whole abstinance thing

  4. sally

    if she’s worried about cancer, then she should lay off the peroxide and stick to her real roots…i’m sure those chemicals have screwed her up mentally. also, she’s friggin nasty. even with all the plastic surgery, still looks your average hick from a small town who comes to Cal trying to make it big. go away.

  5. sally

    if she’s worried about cancer, then she should lay off the peroxide and stick to her real roots…i’m sure those chemicals have screwed her up mentally. also, she’s friggin nasty. even with all the plastic surgery, still looks your average hick from a small town who comes to Cal trying to make it big. go away.

  6. Yeah

    Someone needs to murder these two.

  7. Rabbit

    Damn, I would SO wreck that chick!
    ROFL

  8. mandeer

    She is so nasty, I think I just vomited in my mouth. God she looks pathetic. I just want to rip out her hair extensions and punch her in the face :)

  9. mary

    Please please please stop enabling these people – I don’t know who they are or what they do other than they are featured on your blog and I only go to your blog for a good laugh and they are not funny.

  10. oscar

    nobody cares

  11. ug

    I wish their parents had practiced birth control or at least stopping idiocy beyond belief control… please let the 15 minutes of whoring out end soon

  12. oscar

    nobody cares about them.

  13. I agree with Heidi 100% about the birth control thing, but someone should probably make her aware of the fact that those two sillicone discs that were shoved into her chest last year aren’t exactly what Jesus had in mind for her body either. Nor is the new shnoz. I’m just saying…

  14. I agree with Heidi 100% about the birth control thing, but someone should probably make her aware of the fact that those two sillicone discs that were shoved into her chest last year aren’t exactly what Jesus had in mind for her body either. Nor is the new shnoz. I’m just saying…

  15. I agree with Heidi 100% about the birth control thing, but someone should probably make her aware of the fact that those two sillicone discs that were shoved into her chest last year aren’t exactly what Jesus had in mind for her body either. Nor is the new shnoz. I’m just saying…

  16. I agree with Heidi 100% about the birth control thing, but someone should probably make her aware of the fact that those two sillicone discs that were shoved into her chest last year aren’t exactly what Jesus had in mind for her body either. Nor is the new shnoz. I’m just saying…

  17. H

    I just don’t even know what to say about this. They are just so dumb it hurts.

  18. Mama Pinkus

    do tell us what God thinks of breast implants and whoring one’s body for money and fame, Ms. Heidi

  19. Marc

    I find it funny that when someone questions mainstream media they are conspiracy nuts. I don’t care for heidi ad spencer but I agree with what there saying. No superficial writer Jesus never spoke of microchips but the mark of the beast is something you will have to have in order to buy sell or trade. Now look at two events going on in the world 1 microchips with personal info allowing to pick up bar tabs are being introduced. 2 countries (japan for instance) are pushing for a cashless society. It doesn’t take a genius too put those two things together and assume they may be a food thing. @25 the bible doesn’t make me scared of these things it makes me aware. I’m not scared over the carbon tax Obama is passing that will allow govn to control everyaspect of your life and cause the price of goods to sky rocket I knew it would happen even now as most may deny it the bible has made me aware and therefor removed all fear. Anyways my point is maybe they have changed I’m sure slot of the people posting have just as many if not more problems than heidi and spencer do.

  20. Matthew

    damn it fish No more post of miss and mr.douchebags!!!!!!!!!!!

  21. titsonsnack

    I have yet to see a photo of her where she isn’t making that guffawing “hee-HAWWWW” face. Since I’ve never actually seen her on any of her shitty TV shows or whatever the fuck she does, I imagine that she always walks around like this with her top row of teeth bared, and her jaw jutting out. Eating, sleeping, talking, brushing her hair, all with the hee-haw mouth.

  22. Fuck U

    Noone will ever put anything in her huh? What about the director she fucked to get on that god awful show The hills? What about that Whoredy?
    These two make me want to vomit my guts out. She should just shtthe fuck up. The ONLY thing that bitch should say is:Yes, I will suck your dick!

  23. titsonsnack

    Oh wait there’s a video right there. Nevermind I’d rather keep it a mystery, and keep on visualizing the 24/7 hee-haw.

  24. Funeral Guy

    Ya gotta give the bitch one thing. Her body is SMOKIN’!!!!!!!!

  25. Do FreeBird

    Only a real dick would go in the water with his shirt on.

  26. marcus

    I don’t know which face I’d like to pummel more, his or hers.

  27. lala

    This is crazy- those two are horrible- I cannot believe it!

    UGH!

  28. Eob Forts

    Amen #69 Marc

    As much as I loathe Speidi, I don’t think she is talking rubbish in this instance.

    And Fish, I don’t think it’s fair to call Alex Jones ‘conspiracy nutjob’
    I think he’s actually more accurate than most Mainstream media.

    Check out his website:
    infowars.com

  29. Christina

    Someone should really inform Heidi (and several people who have already commented, apparently) that there are multiple birth control options available…ie condoms. I fail to see how a latex sheath devalues women and causes depression, cancer and sterilization. Hormonal birth control obviously has side effects, which is why there are also condoms. It isn’t rocket science people. Oh, and if Heidi is worried about the possible side effects of birth control, I wonder what her thoughts on the side effects of implants are.

    But seriously, these two need to shut the fuck up. I like how in the audio she goes off about this being a Christian nation despite the fact that people first came to America to get away from religious persecution… which means that we do not force religion onto anyone. They’re so fucking stupid… I would love to be the one to punch them in the face.

  30. actually 9/11 was an inside job, anyone who is smart enough to look at the issue for one second would learn that there is much more than what we are being told. so screw the moderator of this site for discrediting anyone who questions the events of that day. dont be a sheep, research for yourself

  31. Darth

    They’re pretty realistic from their point of view with these ‘end times’ prophecy.

  32. Nero

    Who are these two?

  33. Jim Jones

    Wow. People should stop interviewing and re-printing what these idiots say simply because of the ignorance they spread. Bad for dogs/animals to be chipped? She’d rather her lost puppy gets euthanized because the pound couldn’t locate the owner? And don’t get me started on the birth control thing. Fucking retards.

  34. Scott

    “80. Abby – July 1, 2009 7:01 PM

    actually 9/11 was an inside job, anyone who is smart enough to look at the issue for one second would learn that there is much more than what we are being told. so screw the moderator of this site for discrediting anyone who questions the events of that day. dont be a sheep, research for yourself”

    STFU you vapid cunt. The ‘research’ you speak of is nothing but bullshit. Its loons like you who buy into any fucking conspiracy theory they can get their fat little snausage fingers on, that look like sheep. Literally, and figuratively, in this case.

  35. FUCK YOU thesuperficial.com

    Thankfully SOME PEOPLE GOT ON THEY SHOW THAT ARE “INFAMOUS” or “FAMOUS”

    The INFOWAR Movement is Spreading, letting people know even more about EUGENICS, NWO, ILLUMINATI, TREASONOUS CIA OPERATIONS, EVERYTHING is Being Blown wide open

    Now this INFOWAR, WILL NOW BE FOUGHT BY By the Newer Generation, YOUR KIDS, Thank SOMEONE, we needed More SONS and DAUGHTERS in this Anti Illuminati Movement

    DEATH TO SECRET SOCIETIES

  36. I81B4U

    It’s easy for anyone to make remarks about these 2. I invite everyone of you to check out the websites infowars.com and prisonplanet.com and find out a little bit about what’s going on here in America and in the world. Go ahead and call them names but go ahead and look into microchipping. Check out the documentaries The Obama Decpetion and Endgame. I think some of this information will blow the lid off your head. Don’t take anyones word. Look into it for yourself.

    http://www.infowars.com
    http://www.prisonplanet.com

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAaQNACwaLw

    http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1070329053600562261

  37. Jane

    STFU you vapid cunt. The ‘research’ you speak of is nothing but bullshit. Its loons like you who buy into any fucking conspiracy theory they can get their fat little snausage fingers on, that look like sheep. Literally, and figuratively, in this case.

    Actually, the evidence does point to foul play in terms of 9/11. Its common practice in corrupt governments to stage false flag attacks in order to push their agenda through. (Hitler did it with the Reichtag Fires–blaming a communist for setting fire to the Parliament Building in order to justify suspending civil liberties to protect the common good-meet Homeland Security). I know its hard to accept, but I would watch Loose Change on Youtube before I went condemning others of being conspiracy theory nuts; then you will see we are dealing with conspiracy facts.

  38. Jane

    STFU you vapid cunt. The ‘research’ you speak of is nothing but bullshit. Its loons like you who buy into any fucking conspiracy theory they can get their fat little snausage fingers on, that look like sheep. Literally, and figuratively, in this case.

    Actually, the evidence does point to foul play in terms of 9/11. Its common practice in corrupt governments to stage false flag attacks in order to push their agenda through. (Hitler did it with the Reichtag Fires–blaming a communist for setting fire to the Parliament Building in order to justify suspending civil liberties to protect the common good-meet Homeland Security). I know its hard to accept, but I would watch Loose Change on Youtube before I went condemning others of being conspiracy theory nuts; then you will see we are dealing with conspiracy facts.

  39. conspiracytheory

    @86 I think you need to stop believing everything you read on the internet – please go and join these vapid idiots, they’re laughed at for a reason and I think you just proved it.

  40. robynnn

    “NO ONE WILL EVER PUT ANYTHING IN ME!!!!”

    i know other people already commented about that genius statement, but i just had to quote it one more time. Fabulous!

  41. justifiable

    #88 What the “evidence” points to is an inept government bureaucracy mired down by interagency rivalry and jealousy that didn’t catch the FIRST Trade Center bombing until it was too late – and then rolled over and hit the snooze alarm afterwards rather than try to prevent or predict another. It’s much niftier to grant the government super-secret-hyperintelligence-mastermind capabilities to cook up a scheme like this than it is to admit we were vulnerable and complacent and got fucked over by a group we didn’t think was a real threat. Bush never gave a fuck for the Constitution, any more than Nixon did when he launched COINTELPRO – if you seriously think 9/11 was engineered solely in order to bring about the Patriot Act then you deserve to have this braindead preening Barbie bimbo and her deadweight merkin of a husband as your poster children.

    They’re total cockbibs, so good luck to you all.

  42. I81B4U

    #89 Never do believe everything I read. You could say that for everything: news, websites, newspaper, radio programs. Once you gather information from many sources, through critical thinking you can start putting things together. You know? Or no?

    I did enjoy your reaction to my post though. I’m sincerely crushed by your words. Honest.

    Easy to insult everyone. Harder to put yourself out there.

    Good day.

  43. GG1000

    Yikes. It is the End of Days and these two idiots are the First Sign.

  44. Shazzer

    Good fucking gracious.

    I love that the first thing she thinks of researching is NOT what it does to her body and how it makes women temporarily infertile, but the person who invented it… Right, because Viagra came onto the market because researchers were TRYING to make a boner pill…nothing in the pharmaceutical industry is haphazard. Of course.

    I also enjoy all the raving secret society and other half-crazed conspiracies that were motivated by, ready for this?, a dumb blonde with verbal diarrhea and a propensity for uttering the name “Jesus”. If this is what sparks you to talk about the injustices of the world (and, ironically, not the injustices that continue in say, Darfur, or Tibet), you have zero credibility. It’s like saying something’s true and citing the movie was based on the fact.

  45. @92

    @89 hey do you happen to be a fat Asian guy with no life? You sound a lot like a guy I know.

  46. conspiracytheory

    Actually there is a difference between random websites and newspapers, one has to account for their mistakes, and gets paid to do I don’t know actually research. If you’d like to read the Wall street journal or the Economist you’d realize that there’s nothing behind your theories which basically consist of Obama not being from America …Oh no!!!

    And since you did respond, sorry to have hurt your feelings!

  47. hmm

    Oops sorry I meant @92!

  48. Rabbit

    Yo baby, you ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?

  49. Jane

    #91 So, its more likely that a rag tag bunch of arabs in the desert could single-handedly infiltrate and successfully deliver a blow the worlds most powerful nation; because “they hate our freedom” than it is for the worlds most powerful nation to orchestrate a false flag attack on it’s own shore as a reason to bring in more control, gain capital, and push for world government. Just look at who stands to gain.

  50. fred

    So having your breasts sliced on the underside and a couple of bags of silicone or saleen or whatever they use now inserted in them is better than a microchip? Oh ya and all of this pleases Jesus too. You know, getting fake breasts so that you can expose your body more and sell your body to the highest bidder via photography. Yep Jesus likes that. Completely lying about premarital sex, he likes that too. Acting like a spoiled dittzy brat whose only goal in life is to look good, thats one he likes for sure. Oh god I could go on………………..even funnier is that Alex Jones just pretends that he doesnt see all of this when she’s saying it.

    oh please FISH no more of these 2, JUST THINK YOU COULD BE THE ONLY CELEB SITE THAT IS “HEIDI AND SPENCER FREE SINCE…” YOU GET WHAT I’M SAYING.

    WHO’S WITH ME!!!!!!

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