Heidi Montag’s piehole is a portal of dumb

April 21st, 2008 // 64 Comments

Heidi Montag unveiled her new clothing line Heidiwood at Kitson over the weekend. For those of you who haven’t seen it, I posted about it a week ago and, it’s really stunning stuff. I’m talking the general elegance of a $5 hooker that you’d think about tipping, but will probably keep that dollar for a McMuffin instead. Anyway, Heidi spoke exclusively to Us Magazine about doing a spin-off show with Spencer:

I would love to eventually do a spin-off with Spencer and I,” she tells Usmagazine.com. “We’ve had a lot of ups and downs, and if we make it through this season, I’d love to look down the road to a spin-off.”

“If we make it through this season.” Are you fucking kidding me?! Look, I’m just a jackass who makes poorly-delivered jokes about blowing up Paris Hilton and claims laser beams come out of my cock (They do.). But even I know that The Hills is complete bullshit. The season was finished taping months ago and Heidi and Spencer are still together. In fact, here’s their dumb, stupid posed mugs in Central Park on Thursday. I’m absolutely flabbergasted that folks are out there watching The Hills and thinking “Golly, gee, I’m watching their life truly unfold on my TV.” Seriously, we need to get these people away from the boob-tube before they do something crazy – like vote for John McCain. WHOOOOAA! Didn’t see that coming!


  1. Carli

    Whats more stupid than the fact that people out there might actually be believing they’re watching people’s lives unfold on TV is that Heidi Montag actually believes that people are as stupid as she is.

  2. Jack

    She is so beautiful. I love her. I saw her profile on “S e e k i n g R i c h . c o m ” last week. Is she single now? Just curious.You can contact her on that site.

  3. Did the freak ex-pop star get a coffe today?

    Who is this chick and why do I care? She is not hot, so what does she do?

  4. Holly

    Is it proper to call a girl a tool? cause if you can.. then she is the biggest one in the tool bag.

  5. Stop posting about these two and giving them the publicity they crave. http://www.finickycritic.com

  6. Ty

    Heidi Montag’s piehole is a portal of cumb

  7. ElizabethZ in San Diego

    I AM SO SICK OF THIS STUPID ASS GIRL AND SPENCER. WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL ABOUT THEM. THANKS SUPERFICIAL FOR ALWAYS POINTING OUT HOW ANNOYING AND USELESS THESE TWO ARE. WHAT A WASTE OF LIFE, THEY DO NOTHING FOR ME AND NOTHING FOR THE WORLD SO WHY THE HELL ARE THEY SO FAMOUS, WANNABE ASS LOSERS!!!!!!!

  8. Carter

    #35

    VOTE DEMOCRAT.

    Obama may have made 4 million and Clinton made millions too, but they are willing to give up great tax breaks in order to help the other 97 percent of Americans that do not get the greatest tax breaks like the elite 3 percent.
    US cannot afford to have anymore Americans die in a war that cannot be won like in Vietnam.

    US cannot afford to spend anymore money on the war in Iraq.
    The only people benefiting from the war in Iraq are the corporations profiting from the war as follows:

    Mismanaged & Wasted in Iraq – $10 billion, per Feb 2007 Congressional hearings

    Halliburton Overcharges Classified by the Pentagon as Unreasonable and Unsupported – $1.4 billion

    Amount paid to KBR, a former Halliburton division, to supply U.S. military in Iraq with food, fuel, housing and other items – $20 billion

    Portion of the $20 billion paid to KBR that Pentagon auditors deem “questionable or supportable” – $3.2 billion

    Before the war, White House economic adviser Lawrence Lindsay estimated the cost at $100 to $200 billion. So the White House got rid of him and “re-estimated” the cost at $50 to $60 billion. It’s now over $500 billion

  9. H.A.L.9000

    She’s so fake. She even has mannequin-hands.

  10. EuroNeckPain

    What’s the hanging sack ? Is it a skirt ? A mall stairway parachute ? That’s ugly.

  11. annaki

    Hey! New Heidi Montag Sex Tape! Really worth seeing!
    http://yetmorefun.net/mov.php?v=Heidi_Montag_Sex_Tape

  12. Wow Heidi AND a presidential debate in one comment section?? What’s wrong with the world?

    Oh and Heidi sucks.

    http://www.nikkibgoss.com/

  13. Mi

    is it me, it seems that every time I see Heidi, SHE HAS HER MOUTH OPEN, is there someone on the side always trying to throw something in her mouth, I have some dirty socks I would love for her to taste:)

  14. Elle

    DOES THIS WOMAN EVER SHUT HER MOUTH ???

    “OMG!!!! You, want to take MY picture???”

    She looks so surprised, “I’m just a girl from a small town in blah, blah, blah, blah………………………………SHUT THE F UP HEIDI…..YOU MAKE ME WANT TO PUKE………

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