Heidi Montag is ready to show her nipples now

Heidi Montag is negotiating a second spread for Playboy and this time around she’s willing to make it less Jesus-friendly because, goddamn, fake tits cost are expensive. Via The Scoop:

“She is currently speaking with (Playboy photographer) Matthew Rolston (about) a steamy, soapy, shower concept showing her boobs through the shower door,” said the source. “The figure being discussed for the exclusive is in the seven figures.”
“She could use the money, and she’s finally ready to pose topless, so she is negotiating with the magazine,” according to one of Montag’s friends, who spoke to In Touch Weekly.

I wonder if the first time it was less about her Christian values, which she’s since bailed on for yoga gurus, and more about Heidi legitimately being afraid to show her old body naked. Then again, she pranced around in a bikini every other day, how frightening could her nipples have been? It’s not like they were surgically altered to look like Spencer’s face. — I immediately regret solving that mystery. Who wants to hit me in the frontal lobe with a mallet until I’m color blind? Anyone?