Heidi Montag really will put anything in her mouth

May 24th, 2009 // 83 Comments

Here’s Heidi and Spencer on the set of a Pizza Hut commercial which is exactly why I order Papa John’s. (Also, I’d stab my grandmother for extra garlic butter.) That said, it seems Spencer clearly has experience handling large, snake-like objects. Wait, so that’s why he was in Kevin Casey’s hip-hop video. I get it now.


  1. FIRST, Mother fucker

  2. el nino

    I’d put my stinger in her mouth too

  3. Mother of god I said first already, didn’t I?

  4. Heyyyy, yeah I got it. Hells yeah. Profanity and all.

    1. White – May 24, 2009 5:04 PM

    FIRST, Mother ***er

  5. Geoff

    I hope that snake swallows them BOTH ALIVE. And while she’s at it, she can swallow #1, #3, and #4. And she can swallow the Fish writer too so we can finally have a new one who can keep his promises.

  6. danny

    You know, her face is almost as big as Rumer Willis’ ain’t it?

  7. suzeee

    yippeee!! more things for me to boycot!! nothing personal Pizza Hut you asked for it. Like who does Pizza Hut marketing???..I am who DID cause they are probably fired by now.

  8. Maybe its some new hollywood diet

  9. Megan

    The snake not eating or strangling either of them makes all of snakekind look bad. Sigh. And what the hell is up with his facial hair. It’s like he’s trying to deter Heidi from wanting him to go down on her. Because it disgusts him and he likes co– OH, I get it now!

  10. Zed

    Photo #2 – Heidi’s blowjob face.

  11. Humpinfrog

    It does a heart good to know that “The Chin” and “McGruff the ButtStain” are finally making themselves useful. This is obviously a PSA about the inherent dangers of PizzaHut. Mainly, these two asswipes might show up at your house. Possibly for, you know, attention.

  12. Darth

    I’d almost suspect her from jaw surgery! Holy shit! Any wider isn’t possible i think!

  13. Mama jamma

    Heidi – Sgt. Slaughter called. He wants his jaw back.

  14. FromOutofFrakkinNoWhere

    Oh the Humanity, DAMN U FISH!!!! You said you stop posting these douche bags. It’s not fair the snake didn’t strangle him and the scorpion didn’t sting her, life’s a bitch.

  15. Nero

    Any further and the back of her jaws would push her eyeballs out!

  16. LISA


  17. Sammy Shank

    Here’s what I think is good about Heidi:

    1) She doesn’t have gross, disgusting, fat, cottage cheesy butt cheeks and thighs like KK.

    2) She’s a virgin. (Having sex with Spencer can’t result in a loss of virginity, even to a hamster.)

    3) She’s a Stepford Wife (a la the original film, released in ’75), which is to say android-like. It’ll be years before science can produce robot girl sex toys as realistic as Heidi.

    4) She has a nice butt. (See #1.)

    5) She doesn’t just look young from a distance to the near-blind, she IS young and looks young close up (unlike 40 something cougar Phoebe Price, for example).

  18. Jennyjenjen

    Then pic 8 is Spencer’s blowjob face, while giving a handjob at the same time.. He’s good.

  19. qb

    i wish that shit fucked off heidi and then kill specer mother fucker

  20. Realist

    I don’t understand why people use these two for anything. I’ve met about 5 people that actually like them. I’ve seen them out and about on several occasions at restaurants and clubs. She is much prettier in person. He is exactly the same in every way…

    I enjoy meals at Wolfgangs less thanks to these two as well. Not a fan.

  21. Guy

    Picture 5:


    100% true.

  22. Yours Truly

    Who are these people and why should I care?

  23. Yours Truly

    Who are these people and why should I care?

  24. Rhialto

    They think it’s a deadly scorpio but it’s a harmless crayfish lol.

  25. J

    it would suck if that thing bit heidis tongue which would cause it to swell and then she would die of asphyxiation. now that would be an interesting pizza hut advertisement. haha

  26. Venom

    I would love to put my stuff in her mouth.
    That is a hot bitch and yes, it would be great if the snake ate Spencer.

  27. Anonymous


  28. I am just not a fan of this chick.

  29. Yeah

    You promised you would stop posting about these fucking loser assholes.

  30. Put her through a Gang Bang test and lets see how many cocks at a time she can put in her mouth. ;)

  31. Jo

    What the fuck is people’s fascination with these two douchebags? I thought it would be impossible but they’re more fucking retarded then Paris! How the fuck did they get famous?

  32. get used to it.
    ………………….PROSTITUTES DO, folks!!

  33. Dorito Man


  34. cookie

    For singles …. I found a hot place where you can find your rich and sexy partner…
    Try your best to enjoy life..****SugarBabyMeet.com *****

  35. Swollow it! it will bite inside you

  36. Her jaws and the popping eyes lever effect!

  37. There must be a purpose for the snake in the commercial!

  38. dkny

    omg speidi, you guys are retarded.
    get a life, please.

  39. Boogeyman King Dong


  40. Gando

    Why shouldn’t we eat insects? lobsters look like insects too.

  41. mondo270

    i love the garlic butter sau….

  42. hmna

    Fish, remember this post?


    The above doesn’t meet the criteria. Come on now!

  43. sundnay


  44. sundnay

    She is so sexy and delicious. I found a hot place where you can find such partners.
    *** S e e k b i Co M ***Try your best to enjoy life.I bet you can find your lover there

  45. Beeotch

    Dear Mr. Fish,

    The reason these no talent ass clowns think they are famous, is because sites like this keep posting gay shit about them. Please stop, because these two are pathetic.


  46. Alli Watermelon

    Her head/jaw reminds me of the character they rarely show in FAMILY GUY who has such a large jaw…you can’t understand a word he says. I hate to pick people apart on here, but that girl is just annoying. She does have a nice body though, minus the ice cream scoops on her chest. And Spencer, he just looks like he would drive a big industrial van with a sliding door…selling “candy” to the kiddies. Seriously, slap a ‘stache on his face and you’ve got yourself a chester the molester…

  47. Alli Watermelon

    P.S. Why is she holding her hand like a damn puppy in the first 4 pictures? That’s a good girl, yessss that’s a good girl! Yes she is!!

  48. wet newspaper


  49. Gourmet Vagina

    She’s gonna look like Ann Coulter in exactly 5 years.

  50. These two leave a bad taste in my mouth. They should just go away. For real.

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