Heidi Montag or Barbie with a circulatory system?

January 13th, 2010 // 149 Comments

Completely out of character for an attention-starved blow-up doll, Heidi Montag hasn’t been photographed by the paparazzi since late November. Turns out she’s been spending a small fortune having her chin sanded down and giving the ol’ jugs an extra quart of saline. But to prove Heidi’s still the same vapid pile of “MEEE!!” under there, she’s making up for lost publicity by chronicling her experience for the latest issue of People:

“For the past three years, I’ve thought about what to have done,” the reality star tells PEOPLE. “I’m beyond obsessed.”
And so, on Nov. 20, Montag’s total transformation began. Keeping even her family in the dark, the starlet chronicled every painful moment of recovery and her journey to become “the best me.”

Good for Heidi. I’ve always felt a woman shouldn’t stop getting questionable surgery after questionable surgery until the voices in her head tell her she’s finally beautiful. Kanye’s mom knows what I’m talking about.

Photo: Courtesy of People

  1. Ariana

    My god what the fuck has she done to herself.

    will this bitch please go away.

    When talentless people become famous.

    god . i want to scratch my eyes out LOL.

  2. The amount of self-loathing in this cunt boggles the mind….

  3. momzducky

    lol. She’ll look like that cat lady Jocelyn Wildenstein before too long.

  4. gotmilk?

    40, who cares?!! it’s kanye we’re talking about. and his mom who so desperately needed plastic surgery after being advised not to by credible doctors, she went to some hack to have it done and paid the ultimate price. i’m not really seeing the problem here.

  5. ing

    but now her Leno chin is immortalized in Playboy

  6. Her husband has a flesh colored beard

  7. conando

    wow this slut is ridiculous. plastic surgery is ridiculous. just be happy with what you were born with.

    i hope she dies mid surgery for her fucking “obsession”

  8. jim eh

    She looks horrid, I mean she looked somewhat Hollywood ok before, but now she’s fugly.

  9. eddy

    She used to be okay-looking. I mean, she was vapid and irritating but… y’know, she had some individuality. Comparing those two pictures, one of them looks like a human and the other one looks like a shopfront mannequin.

  10. Another procedure or two and that nose looks like it could be on the fast track to Jackson-town.

  11. Mama Pinkus

    normally I dislike the results of major plastic surgery because it seems to take the character and personality out of a person, but with Ms. Montag it is hard to tell because that vapid gal has never really had true character or personality

  12. gen


    She was mildly cute before. Too bad for her. Stupid, vain, vapid cunt.

  13. Lou

    Is it just me or does she now look like a post op tranny???

  14. Dr.

    Looking good Heidi. One more cup size and then please stop there.

    Then you’ll be absolutely PERFECT.

  15. Enna

    “Normally I dislike the results of major plastic surgery because it seems to take the character and personality out of a person, but with Ms. Montag it is hard to tell because that vapid gal has never really had true character or personality.”

    Exactly what I was going to say. Thank you.

  16. whatever

    for all you guys complaining about how bad she still looks, if you didn’t know this was heidi montag and just saw her on the street, your jaws would drop. i think she’s improved her looks but probably shouldn’t do any more. too bad there’s no surgery for personality.

  17. dontneedone

    why did you have to do that superfcial? that comment about kanye’s mom was wrong. all these people who think its funny, yet when he made fun of artie’s suicide you were all up in hiss ass about how he was a jerk.

    too bad you are showing your true colors superficial. you are one hateful motherfucker, thos comments just dont need to be in there, you’re funny but then you throw in some hateful remark. what for? jerk off.

  18. anonymous

    Gawd. I find her one of the most irritating people on earth…but I do have to admit that she WAS really pretty. She used to look cute, young and something like an actual human being with a unique(ish) face. Now she looks like…well…blah. Yes, “attractive” – but older and boring. Utterly forgettable.

    And I’m sure what Jesus would really be PO’d about is that she’s spent all that money on tinkering with her face – which had nothing wrong with it to begin with, while millions of people around the world don’t have enough food to eat, proper sanitation or even the most basic medical care. She doesn’t need a plastic surgeon – she needs mental health intervention.

  19. A Woman

    Sweet Jeezus, she’s starting to morph into Michael Jackson! She’s already got the nose and eyes! :(

  20. spicy

    Hah. Go ahead, be obsessed with plastic surgery, Heidi. Get 45 procedures. We know youre only doing it so you can get your Spenc to stop looking at other bimbos. But then what happens after your 46th procedure when you look like a a fucking alien trying to disguise itself as a dumb twat american citizen. Your ass will be dropped and all you will have left is a bunch of plastic and some medical bills to pay.

    Idiot. Your children that you so desperately want wont even resemble you.

  21. snowpea

    God she’s a piece of shit.

  22. Gee, I think she looked better BEFORE she had the work done!

  23. L

    I am going to say “FUTURE ANNA NICOLE”!!!

  24. Joe Simpson

    Stil looks like a fat old tranny!! She deserves to be in a casket along with Casey Johnson…Too bad they couldnt switch places….Hopefully soon!

  25. kayla

    definitely looks like a post op tranny
    she doesn’t even look like herself anymore

  26. cc

    With self-esteem issues like hers, she should spend that money on therapy. When she’s 40 (maybe 35) she’s going to look like an old handbag.

    Apparently her new boobs are DDD, and she’s planning on increasing them again. Seriously, she needs more than DDD?

  27. Heathen

    I certainly hope you don’t go to hell for such comments…’cause I certainly couldn’t go a day without the Superficial. Keep up the good work!!

  28. LMS

    @ #16…

    Yeah but then she’d probably just sit there and say: “Like…Oh my God…like at least I don’t look like THAT! hehehehe…Like when’s my manicure?”

    I dont usually comment on her and the likes of Paris Whorton, but enough is enough! Stop giving these fucktards attention and coverage they DONT deserve and they’ll go away. This worthless, vapid, self centered, hypocritical cunt needs to step in front of a train! She is a joke!!!

  29. This woman is so ridiculous. Enough already!

    My last blog post: http://www.readheadreviews.com/2010/01/09/spotlight-room-to-read/

  30. me again

    that’s a disease. she needs mental help.

  31. gigi

    this has to be a joke…… Spencer’s behind it right? some kind of trump the Guido’s move, and it’s all photoshopped?? right??? yiiiiiiiiikes

  32. pirhan

    I’m excited to see her later this year on AwfulPlasticSurgery.com when her face collapses. :’D

  33. DeepThoughts

    Yeah because looking like a transvestite is every woman’s dream. Or at least that’s what Spencer told her.

  34. JV

    she looks like SHAUNA SAND now!

  35. Monica

    Kanye’s mom comment= too soon?

  36. bf

    this makes me so sad. she has always been a little annoying but STUNNINGLY beautiful. she looks terrible now… totally different. her chin was soooo better before. what a shame

  37. Stacy

    She is soooo hot. I love her. You just don’t like her b/c of her politics. If she was left wing, gay loving, pro abortion, you’d be slobbering over her beautiful body.

  38. Looking pretty downhill on that people cover. She can disappear now. I’ll be alright with that.

  39. Candy

    This girl has serious issues. An eye lift at 23???? Her cheek implants look scary!! She looks like a pornstar…this is not beautiful! She used to look stupid but sweet…now she looks scary! Her face does look a lot more mannish. I feel bad for her, and all the other Hollywood broads who look to fill their emptiness with the shallow adoration that others give to their fake bodies. Disgusting. This is what’s wrong with America. Next thing, she’ll be running for vice president, preaching about empowering women. Perfect, just what we need more of. I predict by the time she turns 30, she’ll be one of those freak show circus acts. So so sad. Can someone give her gun and end it already, she’ll probably die under the knife some day anyway. And when did it become normal to your face up and be proud of it? It’s like a new breed of super shallow, useless, ugly, empty human-bots are taking over the media. Whatever sells right? Welcome to America.

  40. ang

    ugh. she looks terrible. her nose looks like shit and she sanded her chin down too much. looks like she got cheek implants. gross.

  41. is it just me or does she now look like a tranny trying to look like Teri Hatcher?

  42. haha lol

    The other day somebody posted a comment in one of the Tila Tequila posts that they would rather have Heidi and Spencer back instead of having to hear about that goblin. I think satan does exist.

  43. ham

    I didn’t recognize her at first, but that’s because her mouth is finally closed.

  44. Ren

    looks like Meryl Streep to me!

  45. Veronica

    @Candy — exactly. Nicely said.

    How awful is this girl that I was thinking that she makes Paris Hilton look good.

  46. Roughgasm

    Chin reduced? she is taking what mongrels off the internets type to heart…

  47. sahara

    she looks so much like janelle pierzena in that pic

  48. cc

    If she dropped in on her parents, they’d probably be ‘No thanks, we don’t need any Avon products. OH! It’s you honey! You should have called ahead.’

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