Heidi Montag needs look-alikes for fashion show

March 27th, 2008 // 89 Comments

Heidi Montag is launching her new fashion line. It’s called Heidiwood (Not even touching that.) and will debut next month. In the meantime, Heidi needs nine girls that look like her to help model the clothes. Although, judging by Heidi’s chin, dudes are probably welcome as well. Us Magazine has the details about the line which is like so better than Lauren’s and junk:

“Lauren’s line is not necessarily something I would wear,” she told Us Weekly. “She’s trying a high-fashion thing, but it’s a little overpriced. Mine is fun and flirty for the everyday woman. Most people can’t afford $200 for one dress.”

Note to self: Show up to Heidi’s fashion show. Act like douche. Score vapid blondes with fake tits. If douche-nozzling is not achieving success resort to fail-safe plan: Dollar bill hung out of fly. Shoot fish in barrel. End note.

For those of you interested in applying, here’s a link to the contest. And also here’s my phone number 1-800-LZR-DONG.

Thanks to Sara who apparently has a pointy tail.

Photos: Getty Images

  1. Sidney

    Her implants have that nasty looking gap which is where the cleavage should be!

  2. V

    MAKE IT STOP!!!!

  3. Feel_the_velvet

    Her heidiwood is a full 3 inches long.

  4. Auntie Kryst

    Can this Heidi puke enter into her own contest? She still sort of looks like herself.

  5. lucy

    if i ever saw her face to face, i’d puke all over her and her nasty implants.

  6. shutupwhore

    God, what a dumb and vapid cunt-ry. I can’t believe this is the shit we glorify.

  7. gotmilk?

    if the clothes are only designed to fit clones of her, then what is all this talk of clothing for the everyday woman?

    plus, she’s dressed like an ass half the time. who would willingly want to look like her? not I.

  8. fergernauster

    I nominate Tori Spelling as the front-runner for horseface Montag’s look-alike.

    Anybody wanna second that?

  9. Paige

    Um, it shouldn’t be too hard to find several vapid, bleached-out, implanted anorexics in L.A. Try walking outside.

  10. insecthero

    ” judging by Heidi’s chin, dudes are probably welcome as well.”

    Ha ha! That’s exactly what I thought when I saw that picture.

  11. She looks like a horrible lay.

  12. Meaghan

    When my grandmother passed away, my Mom took all of her old dresses and made my brother and I a quilt out of them. I am wondering if this idea would work with heidi montag???

    Incorporate her material into a quilt…either full size or a tiny one for new babies???

    (on the subject of quilts, I had a friend offer me hers but once she got it out and looked at it she said I needed my own special quilt. She ended up offering to help make one (pricing it made it more expensive than buying commercially made though) and then she helped me alter it to be more modest for my taste. When I took my quilt in to the thrift store here the staff were very pleased… there’s a lot of demand. It would be sad for someone to be denied their wedding dream just because of economics. I must admit tho’, if I’d thought of the Christening shawl idea before giving the quilt away, might’ve had second thoughts. But the quilt was gone from the thrift store within an hour of its being put on the rack so hopefully someone used it to make their wedding a wee bit more special!)

  13. V

    I nominate Texas Tranny..

  14. Seriously, why is the fake tramp famous? Why do people give a crap about her at all (besides the big fake tits that is).

  15. Grammar freak


    So, how long have you been a Troll?

  16. Lee


  17. gotmilk?

    12, wtf is up with you? Try getting a job so you don’t have as much time to post these lengthy diatribes because no one cares. Better yet, get your own blog so we don’t have to be subjected to your annoying as fuck posts.


  18. mike

    @16 Meaghan is hot too. She likes it up the ass.

  19. meh

    I never thought about it before, but you’re right…she does look like Tori Spelling. That’s pretty sad.

  20. V

    Reading Meaghans posts = looking at heidi’s face.

  21. kevin

    I hate this phoney nasty couple !!! can’t we just boycott them ! no more pics of these two LOSERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  22. I accept……………..

  23. Meaghan

    lol i bet if they came to your house and wanted to you would be like “uhhhhhh n-n-n-no thanks…”

    also, what the fuck do you people think is funny about her?? she is so stupid and not funny at all

  24. That’s a raher manly looking jawline on that dude in a dress

  25. Spencer needs to dump this plastic bitch. Getting engaged is a mistake, getting married is a disaster. He’s a very handsome young man and he’s got his whole life ahead of him. It’s foolish to mess that up with women.

  26. Dude

    She needs look alikes? ,,,

    1. Blonde
    2. Fake tits

    …next stop California. I think there’s a couple girls out here that can satisfy those requirements.

  27. She looks like a pretty version of Tori Spelling, which is to say like an ugly version of my anus.

  28. Missy

    I think Meahgan has been drinking the alcohol she told us should be outlawed!

    @ #17 AMEN!

    @ #20 LMAO!

    Heidi is so ridiculous! I would be so embarassed to be her.

  29. Meaghan

    If you assholes treat me nicely I may tell you about my alien abduction next week. Ask me nicely…

  30. mike

    I love you Meaghan! Will you have dinner with me tonight?

  31. veggi

    ah, clothes for the everyday woman.

    An Easter dress meant for a 5 year old, 5-inch hooker heals and a stuffed animal as an accessory.


    I hope you can buy the “make your face glisten like the inside of a microwavable popcorn bag” make-up too!

  32. Anonymous

    OK, Meaghan, I’m asking you nicely to tell me about your alien abduction, but you must do it NOW. Out with it.

  33. Meaghan ( with sloppy fishy soaking wet oozing douche cup)

    How big is you cunt stick Mike?

  34. Tom Cruise

    #25 – I suspect we have shared interests. I have many types of lube. Call me.

  35. Grammar freak

    Y’all leave Meaghan alone now.

    (That girl has her own Everest-size problems)

  36. Vince Lombardi

    She really comes off as a discount-store bimbo. Her breasts were done on the cheap, she won’t pay for a decent dermatologist or at least a bottle of whatever it is that Jessica Simpson uses, and on top of ALL that, she doesn’t even carry a tissue to get the booger hanging from her left nostril in picture 1.

    I’m kinda diggin’ Britney a little more after this broad.

  37. How the fuck does she know I don’t have 200 bucks for an outfit?? That’s what my credit cards are for. Bitch.

    Oh yeah, I’m in debt..

  38. Another thing.
    I have a similar hairdo as she does ( with a lot more native hair ). You can start by applying the dermmatch, little bit. then apply rogaine to the hair. the rogaine will act like a gel & hold hairs which are far apart together. Now sprinkle the toppik fibers on top to complete it.

  39. #38 WTF are you talking about??

  40. criss cross

    Whats with the crossed legs in all the photos? I thought that if they took the time to set up all these damn pictures she would at least have enough time to take a piss…. Thats what you get for thinking I guess

  41. alex

    someone call tori spelling

  42. lets goooo

    She said she was a virgin on E! News. Some interview with Ryan Seacrest. I don’t believe it. But who cares. She’a stupid, fake bitch.

  43. mike

    @33 Meaghan, It is big enough to make you say “OH GOD’ just before you pass out.

  44. For years, I had noted down my thoughts, stories and verse in order to “do something with them”, one day – but lacked the courage to have them constructively commented on. But life is short ~ if you ‘let it be’, so here goes:

    A beacon of hope, of strength and desire
    - becomes nothing of substance, just an extinguished fire
    The lack of endeavour to create a career
    - because of an apathy ~ that’s just based on a fear

    C & C please.

    anyway – Heidi still looks good enough to eat.

  45. LBot

    Hello Jay Leno….is that you????

  46. sla

    She can buy a bunch at the Adam and Eve site. The link below goes to “Jesse Jane,” which is a pretty good likeness except the boobs are much more realistic. And it’s probably better in bed.


  47. Bettie

    Chris Crocker should definitely audition!!!!

  48. michy

    black shoes, pink dress and white purse!?!??!?!?this girl doen’t know anything about fashion!

  49. Bettie

    Chris Crocker should definitely audition!!!!

  50. #44 who ARE you??

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