Heidi Montag is gonna make it

With The Hills being taken out to a field and shot, Heidi Montag is excited to begin her career as a “full time motion picture actress.” In fact, she even wrote a screenplay to get things started. I’m not even joking. Via People:

One of the characters Montag wants to play is “a lifeguard named Summer” in a script she wrote herself.
“I am making the first 3-D beach comedy about a shark that attacks a small beach town and I save the day with my 3-D boobs,” Montag says. “I’ve even written a role for Dolly Parton to play the town mayor!”

So let me get this straight: All this time Heidi Montag has secretly been the greatest screenwriter of our generation? Jesus Christ. Who saw that coming? James Cameron’s probably stealing this pitch for Avatar 2 as we speak. “Okay, remember how they were all on that crazy planet with the messed up shit? This time it’s on a beach patrolled by Heidi Montag’s 3D tits. You give me money now.”

Photos: Splash News
Tags: Heidi Montag