Heidi Montag finds happiness with fake breasts

September 26th, 2007 // 153 Comments
0926_heidi_montag_birthday_00.jpg

Heidi Montag confirmed that she had breast augmentation and rhinoplasty surgery in April. For those of you keeping score at home, Heidi got implants and a nose job. The reality star gave an exclusive interview to Us Magazine about the experience:

On why she had surgery:
“I’ve always been very insecure about my body. My whole life, I looked at my chest and was like, OK, they’re going to grow. This is my year! And it never happened. I was less than an A-cup. I wore pushup bras, which cut into my skin. If I was with a guy and there was a girl next to me with big boobs, I would be like, Oh, my God, he’s looking at her!”

On being teased about her appearance:
People would say, “You have such a big nose!” And they’d make fun of me for being so flat, and say mean boy things, like, “If you nailed two nails in a board, they would be bigger than you are.” I was tormented. And when I was older, I’d want to be intimate, but I’d feel insecure. My boyfriends always had bigger chests than I did!”

On going under the knife:
“But surgery is a very big deal. Right before I went in, I was like, What if I don’t wake up? Oh, this is scary. Then I thought, I don’t care. If I don’t wake up, it’s worth it. I just wanted it so badly.”

Okay, no one ever told me The Hills taught people moral lessons. I’ll still never watch it, but it’s good to know positive messages are being sent to young girls. Either have great breasts or get elective surgery that you might not wake up from. I’m practically crying that such a pure, wholesome example is being set. Bless you, Heidi Montag. Bless your large fake breasts and skewed world view.

Note: If you completely missed the sarcasm above, it’s time to lay off the reefer and think about getting a job. No rush though. Make sure you click on a few ads first. You know what; on second thought forget what I said. Light up and enjoy some fine gossip. You earned it.

superficial

  1. Her testicles aren’t as big as TT’s.
    TT came over last night and I sucked he/she’s big fat cock. I couldn’t swallow the whole load, so TT busted the rest all over my face. I really love that sissyboy juice.

  2. bob

    yeah 47, i was wondering that myself.

    43, i don’t think violet sin said a word about Heidi’s appearance. so try some reading comprehension while you’re learning english, fuckstain.

  3. @51 Fuck you troll, go blow your dead brother. You know you still dream about him coming into your room and sliding you the high hard one!!

  4. ROFL AT YOU GUYS

    What EVER!!!! WTF!! Can’t you guys totally get a fucking life?????? I HAVE a life. A real one. I don’t come here to do what you do!!!!!!!!! Which is being totallly lameos. I’m like, whatever!

  5. Texas Tranny

    @51,
    Yeah, what the real Jimbo said.

    Fucking shit-for-brains

  6. Sadly, she does look a bit like Tori Spelling-just prettier.
    Such a mean girl though-that makes her really ugly
    no matter what she has done to herself.

  7. Fuck! Why did I say “hard one” in that last comment?! Spontaneous ejaculation. Again. And I already used up my spare office pants this morning. Fuck!

  8. I tell you, that dream is always getting me in trouble. The last time I had a girl over, I fell asleep and had the dream, and she woke up and saw me moaning into the pillow with my ass all up in the air. She grabbed the $100 off the bedstand and bolted! Fuck!

  9. ssdd

    45. ROFL AT YOU GUYS – September 26, 2007 3:14 PM
    and i honestly this is how you people spend yoru lives, ive read the horribly pathetic comments on here once and thought never again, until he footnoted the post
    leave this people alone you fucking ugly hypocrites
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~

    LOL First off… are you drunk??!… Second, or are you joking ?… You’re calling other people a hypocrite when infact you yourself portray one in your comments very well.
    Oh well ..doesn’t matter …………Fuck ya to hell FAT BITCH.

  10. bob

    so apparently 43/54 took did take english lessons…from Heidi. good choice, retard.

  11. ROFL AT YOU GUYS

    Apparently, bob is back with his/her vagina.

  12. You guys are cracking me up today. So much so that I am willing to share my lunch with all of you. Egg salad anyone?

  13. Ooba Gooba

    Man…..this chick needs a personality transplant, and quick. Talk about “into herself”…….

  14. bobisnotmyname

    yes bob is back. so i guess the name on here has to be my real name?? bob are my fucking initials ass-raper.

  15. Wow she just turned 6 judging from the cake, and if you click on the cake pic, you will see demon pedophile eyes. Seriously, do it. They will burn your soul!!!

  16. Pinko

    Next will be a “stolen” sex tape and she’ll get all excited when one (deluded) internet blog comment says she looked hot.

  17. FRIST – wow, are you high?! And will you share?

  18. I LOVE the pic with the fingers-frozen-in-snap-position. The snapping while dancing is in my top ten Hilarious Insecure Club Behaviors. Goes hand in hand with worrying that your date is checking out the woman next to you with bigger jugs.

  19. Uncle Eccoli

    I could never respect any woman with breast implants. Poor self-esteem and the practise of defining one’s self-worth by cup size (in either direction) is VERY unattractive.

  20. I find it hard to believe that anyone finds her interesting enough to interview her, in fact I’m bored just talking about how bored I am with her, so BYE!!!

  21. sera

    Now, all she needs to do is get rid of the sack dresses!!!

  22. Beth

    This woman is NUTS. Here I am a size 4 with an F cup. They get in your way and it’s impossible to golf. The backaches are daily and one day she’ll wish for her AA cup.

  23. Kinda jumpy today, FRIST. Are you in withdrawal?

  24. Dave

    Beth,
    Got any pictures of your F-cups, you’d like to share?

  25. i was in the areola so i decided to drop by

    Poor Beth. She has to dial a “1″ to talk to her nipples.

  26. TS

    #’s 1 and 2, I didn’t know this was a race to see who was the biggest dork. Veggi, you are a seasoned veteran, act like it. More is expected out of you.

    On a different note for a change, am I the only one who wants to beat the hell out of this dude? No blonde moustaches. This guy reminds me of the rich fem-boys who got BMW’s for their 16th birthdays in high school. I can’t decide if I want to bash his face in or grab him by the collar, spit in the palm of my hand and bitch slap him about 15 times in a row in front of his “girlfriend.”

  27. And those boobs are all she is going to have for the rest of her life, till they fall off. http://www.gossipgonewild.com

  28. Tabitha

    Actually I think the dress suits her. All it needs is a bar code and “White Girl” in black lettering.

  29. OOhBeth

    Beth,
    I know it is adolescent of me. But If you ever want someone to oogle your boobies, well hell, I will. Doctor Fish says F-cup back ache is relieved when the female in pain hears the sighs of a male who is oogling her boobies. Don’t believe all that Dick Matters talk cuz boobs are boss.

  30. Tits McCholo

    Speaking of Trolls…

    The guy and girl this post is originally about, are just plain, boring… and wannabe celebs. you know… some people think Fame=success/power, and they want that. They don’t realize, real power comes from knowledge and wisdom.
    Neither of which they have. In fact, they came up wanting.

  31. are they that important??

    whoopi goldberg has bigger tits than jessica alba, but people generally prefer jessica alba. i wonder alessandra ambrosio ever worries about being in a room with your average lunch lady that would have bigger tits than her….
    TITS ARE NOT THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT IMPORTANT!!!
    ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS LOOK AROUND TO REALIZE!

  32. yukadoozer

    A real Original. What a special young lady-brains, talent a strong moral code now Beauty!

  33. tribalhulk

    You guys are stupid. She’s hot as fuck. I would wreck that.

  34. I don’t know, she’s rather plain looking.

  35. flapping labia

    I just had explosive diarrhea that was sexier than her. I’d like to punch this bitch in the cunt.

  36. should have gotten a new chin for that still big & fucked up tooter

  37. ssdd

    They are the New Tori Spelling & Ian Ziering of 2007 …Post *90210
    Notice how he has the same Brillo Pad Hair …it wouldn’t lift up from his scalp in a hurricane ~ and most likely, when he jumps out of the pool it dries instantly like a dogs hair.
    She’s got the Tori look down pat in pic 4 ..
    Assclowns.. LOL ..

    and 81~ “whoopi goldberg has bigger tits than jessica alba, but people generally prefer jessica alba.”

    Uh .. well .. I can’t believe you just coupled these two in the same sentence under the same circumstance. Jesus Christ what the fuck are you smoking?..
    WHoopie Goldberg should only ever be mentioned in the same sentence with that of Alpo, Gravy Train … or something along those lines.

  38. Kelley

    They are irritating just to look at.

  39. riley

    “Then I thought, I don’t care. If I don’t wake up, it’s worth it.”

    that speaks volumes.
    i sometimes wish we could take everyone who agrees with that statement and just gas them and get it over with.

  40. jacknasty

    I was at the airport yesterday, Hiedi and Lauren were on magazine covers right next to eachother…..Hiedi is WAY WAY uglier

  41. r33d

    who the hell writes for this site, it’s so uninspiring and repetitiously boring

  42. 49 – thank you, you made my day. ;P

    43 – Lessee… I didn’t say anything about her body, have nothing to hide regarding how I look or earn my living (FFS, I link my site), and mentioned myself that I have a natural not-barbie body. Not really sure what you are trying to say here, buddy.

  43. LAUREN

    DONT KNOW IF ANYONE ELSE NOTICED…. SHE’S NOT WEARING HER ENGAGMENT RING IN ANY OF THESE PHOTOS!

  44. IKE

    If she was feeling THAT bad, then the surgery is a good thing.

    As for the ring…..
    “HAVE BOOBS WILL TRAVEL.”
    lol

  45. FatDrunkAndStupid

    What bothers me is that she looked MUCH hotter before the surgery. The boobs look fake as hell and her previous nose gave her face character while now she just looks like your run of the mill LA stripper. What these dumb bitches don’t understand is that guys like boobs, and it doesn’t really matter what size they are. When she was next to that big boobed girl, her boyfriend probably was checking out that chick. And now, when she’s next to a small breasted girl (or a girl with a rack just as big as hers, only natural) he’ll be checking that girl out. That’s just the way guys are. You looked good before Heidi. Now you look worse. Dumb move.

  46. titsmcgee is RIGHT

    Right.
    I don’t feel sorry for her.
    Deal with your nose and fucking tit size. That is not torture. Every single person is uncomfortable about something – that is just part of life. I don’t know a woman at all who hasn’t suffered extreme self-consciousness or dislike for a body part, etc.
    Fuck this sad bitch with no personality. She is still blank on the inside. And 21. What a loser. Now she has no feeling in her tits, but that’s okay because they are only for other people’s pleasure, right? Way to be a woman. Puke on her. Fucking Hollywood needs a reality check!!!!

  47. scooter

    Pix 8, 9, 11… she should get some shoes that fit. Those make her look like Minnie Mouse or sumthin’…

  48. 23apples

    I remember when the before/after pictures of her were on the covers of the tabloids. My roommates and I would look at them while waiting in line at the checkout… she looks the same to me. Her boobs are probably bigger, but if she was going to spend money on getting her nose done, why didn’t she opt for something aesthetically appealing… as opposed to a slightly smaller and uglier looking nose?

  49. I must sayy that you all are freakin hilarious.

    But everyone knows- tits were so 1990′s, 2000′s are alll about the boooty!

  50. Me

    you know, she may not be the brightest bulb, but I see her going further than Lauren Conrad. She’s not so cute, she’s got an ugly boyfriend, but she is talented in that she can at least sing. oh well, you can’t have it all in life, now can ya?

Leave A Comment