Heidi Montag is ‘Officer Busty Jones’

October 31st, 2008 // 94 Comments

These are pics of Heidi Montag decked out for Halloween, and while I dodged a bullet yesterday, there’s no way I’m not posting this latest set to hit my desk. Chins McJugs dressed up as a slutty cop? That’s everything this site stands for. When The Superficial Writers came over on the Mayflower trying to touch some Pilgrim boob, we dedicated ourselves to celebrating giant mammary glands regardless of race, creed or vapid C-wordiness. That said, I tried to leave Spencer out of these pics as much as possible. Mostly because I’m an artist and want to make sure you guys capture the inner beauty of these photographs. (Read: Heidi Montag’s large, stupidly fake breasts.) Trick or Treat!


  1. hahah There goes everybodys breakfast

  2. kevin

    First ! can’t we just put them in quarentine for a while

  3. maeby

    paris wore that a couple of years ago

  4. Teef

    Not first..maybe 3rd? Yay for me, where’s mah cookie?

  5. superstar

    Nice outfit, but I swear the outfits are supposed to be scary?

  6. tylerdurden

    Goddamn, she’s so ridiculously ugly.

    Stop breaking your promise SW! Even if there are titties involved.

  7. Chins mc jugs! wow youre on a roll superfish,,,,but she look so bangable though

  8. Ted from LA

    That’s a very unique look. There will only be 2.6 million of those across college campuses tonight. Slutty nurse will be a close second. Hockey Mom, distant third.

  9. Katey

    I wish they would spontaneously combust..

  10. bort

    you superfuckwit guys are fucken lying idiots.. probably get rimmed by spencer.

  11. bho

    She is so hot!!!! It is said she is dating friends on a sports dating community ==mysprtsdate.com== Her sexy photos are found there.it’s the real place where hot cougars and milfs hang out with sexy young men!! My friends told me so, gonna check it out!!

  12. Lee

    She is so ‘busted’

  13. Ted Kennedy's tumor

    Too bad the gun isn’t real and she blows hos freaking gay head off.

    Nice rack though.

  14. lala

    I hate you for doing this to me so early in the morning…

  15. Carson

    I’d still hit that.

  16. Thigh Highs

    She isn’t very pretty….just average. I don’t see what all the fuss is about!

  17. Carson

    I’d stick that gun straight up her arse

  18. Cliff Clavin

    The douche twins are more irritating than Mimi!

  19. Ted Kennedy's tumor

    Oops, make that “his”….blow HIS head off.

    Still, nice jugs though.

  20. DStar

    They are both sooo ugly.
    I hope they don’t have kids.

  21. literarycritic

    I hate to say it, but she looks 10000000000x better than Paris in that outfit.


    Sad, really — it says more about how skanky/ugly Paris is than anything about how “attractive” Heidi is.

  22. Naddy

    she looks like a tranny, that horse face of hers

  23. Deuce Bigalow


  24. sirrix

    Fish – you’re pathetic. You “tried” to leave Spencer out of the pics? Why didn’t you just “actually” leave him out of the pics?

    The only reason I have ever heard of these asshats is because I’m a loyal Superficial reader. That’s just awful.

  25. Crushie

    I think you guys are just jelous… howcome u never right something good?

  26. glace neuf

    i’d hit and then bust it for ocular assault.

  27. Mr.Peanut

    @27—Welcome Spencer! I see your grammar and spelling have improved.

  28. Derek

    Seriously? One had after we have to look at Paris Hiltons armpit in order to avoid a Heidi picture you post this?

    Thought you decided unless she was naked or in a bikini there wouldnt be anymore of these two airheads.

    These two are famous for nothing and get over a million a year in their attempt to be celebs. With our country tanking financially it is insane to hear what these two pull in.

  29. LOVER

    OK, so i dont really like them cause they are pathetic losers and just want attention, but shes gorgeous i think. Whos ugly is Megan Fox lol shes so fake.

    Anyway, Heidi is a bitch and a loser, but i give her props for being so darn beautiful

  30. ToTellTheTruth

    She’s STILL a fugly looking slut…

  31. Fat Chicks Suck

    It’s obvious the owners of this site receive compensation for posting Heidi/Spencer pictures. I’m sure it’s not much…but regardless I don’t see anything wrong with making a few bucks for the service they provide us. Beyond that…I think Heidi has a smoking hot body and I never get tired of looking at it. I’m not a big fan of fake tits…but her body is ridiculously nice. I couldn’t care less if this website is making money by posting them. Yes they’re morons…but she’s hot and why not make a few bucks off of the idiots?

    Any guy that says he wouldn’t knock this chick’s pussy out of her asshole is full of shit. Her face isn’t perfect but it’s not like it’s unattractive and her body is nearly perfect. She’s hotter than 99.5% of women and if all I’m doing is looking at her I don’t care how worthless she is otherwise.

  32. Maximus

    Ok. Just this once, I’ll forgive you for posting Heidi. But next time I see that douche Spencer, I’m going on a rampage.

  33. mikesh

    shes not hot at all dear #12!!!!

  34. Rant

    She wanted to be something for Halloween that she will never be….RELEVANT!

  35. Help me!

    I am actually beginning to enjoy the shameless cheesiness of this duo’s antics. It sometimes seems like an unintentional satire on the degraded values of our deteriorating culture. Could this be the first sign of encroaching dementia? Mental illness? The complete erosion of my taste and intellect?

  36. Agent Zero

    What the hell, did she get her breast implants taken out or something?

  37. Right Fury

    Lollohahhelol. Spencer…is…in…jail. His secret wish has come true

  38. simplicity

    why do you continue posting about these people?
    they arent famous
    they arent celebrities
    they arent important
    what do they bring to anyone’s lives?

  39. joline

    She is so beautiful and charming. She is my favorite. Just saw her on the fitness & celebrity dating club ^^^^^^FitnessKiss. C O M^^ ^^^^last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that

    site.Is she single now?

  40. Rant

    Nice one #39…..he will drop his soap constantly.

  41. frank

    DUde it’s time you came out and admitted your secret love of Spencer. May god help your soul.

  42. missy

    i do not like they but i love to hate them

  43. Sport

    Trick. Bastard.

  44. mike

    Fuck you queers. She’s totally hot in these pics! Doesn’t make her any less of a ass hat, but seriously, there’s no way in hell I’d kick her out of bed!

  45. combustion8

    more like Officer Horseface

  46. tig

    @29 – Exactly. But, come on. #27 isn’t Spencer. Spencer does have thumbs, does know all of the alphabet letters ( maybe not in order), and is over the age of nine – Ok, emotionally that isn’t true.

  47. Joe

    Both Atom and RSS are broken. Neither are showing images. I’m guessing at this point that Heidi Montag is smarter than your systems administrator.

  48. Mike

    Ass hat or not, she’s fucking hot, and even more so in these pics. I’d push ‘em both off a cliff, but unless you’re gay, this has to turn you on.

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