Heidi Klum is all kinds of nude

October 30th, 2009 // 191 Comments

It’s Friday, so I honestly can’t think of better way to start the day than Heidi Klum all kinds of naked and covered in chocolate sauce. Here she is in photographer Rankin’s just-released coffee table book Heidilicious which is probably the most moving reading experience I’ve had since that time a stripper punched me in the face for reading The Da Vinci Code during a laptop dance. How was I supposed to put that thing down with all the suspense and Jesus wifery?

Pics link to NSFW versions.

Photos: Rankin

  1. jklhjkh


  2. No way

    There must be a lot of plastic surgery and a lot of airbrushing involved because a woman just isn’t going to look like that after children. That defies nature.

  3. Rough intentions

    Heidi go clean up that Seal goop off ya…

    That whore of a goddess is a machine, wasnt she pregnant last week…

    Yeah Fish I missed booty Juice fridays…

  4. Shea

    yummy, id be all over that. now wheres the whipped cream?

  5. Wow…that pretty much is the tastiest photoshoot I’ve ever seen.

    God damn, god damn!


  6. havoc

    Are you sure she just wasn’t in a Porta-Potty that someone pushed over?

    It could happen.


  7. JADE

    These can’t be new didn’t she like JUST have a baby. If they are new all I can say is *I hate her*!!

  8. Anon

    Women can look like that after pregnancy. Just not the women who spend all their time on the internet jealous of women who get their figures back.

    Don’t hate her for having better genes before getting pregnant.
    Put the cake down, do some exercise and who knows.

  9. Jenna

    She just had a baby? Like last week? If so, then these can’t be accurate. Even with superior genetics, her breasts would be completely engorged.

  10. D

    These are not new! I’m not even sure if she is back to work yet. But these are after she had her other kids and all I can say is not fair. Seal is one lucky bastard!

  11. Jenna

    I need to go Google Image what her beast-herd looks like. The laws of karma dictate that if you are voted the sexiest model alive after going through childbirth a million times – your children are doomed to be hideous. ;-D

  12. Jenna

    It’s totally possible, even with bad genetics, to look that good after pregnancy. All you need is a staff to watch over the kiddos while you rush back and forth between the gym and the plastic surgeon’s. Because I’d totally want to go through all that work and money to go home to Seal and get the “I wouldn’t kick her out of bed” approval of all the computer jockey’s that frequent The Superficial. :-D ;-*

  13. JADE

    @9 your an ass.
    Not jealous at all I lost the baby weight real fat too, but she had the baby less than a month ago. Was just saying there is no way she lost the baby weight to look that good that fast. She isn’t super human.

  14. KIKI

    She is fantastic. Kudos Heidi. Although I don’t like foodstuffs on the body, it looks yuckky.

  15. e-rock

    Come on guys, these shots are not new, they are pre-pregnancy. Still…. NOT FAIR, NOT FAIR, NOT FAIR. That woman has the genes of a Godess, and probably the most genetically gifted woman on th planet. WTF, her boobs are priceless!!!! Seal is one lucky man!! I realize she has help with kids, probably has a personal trainer, and chef, but come on… NOT FAIR. And I doubt she has had any plastic surgery.

  16. Catani

    What the hell happened? She could get to bathroom in time? ….Or did a army of burrito eating babies took a dump on her? Either way…..mmmm…interesting.

  17. Meugh

    [Deleted for being a racist with a tiny penis. - The Superficial]

  18. Mister Bored

    She’s beautiful, these pictures are rather cool… her losing prior baby weight… she’s a MODEL. That’s her job folks. She doesn’t lose the weight, she has no job.

    Anyway, I’m surprised the typical racist crowd hasn’t appeared upset that she’s being “ruined” by a black dude… blah blah.

  19. KIKI

    @ 16. Do you really think those boobs are God given? I think they are incredible works of plastic surgery but that is my opinion.

  20. She looks like Carrie in the pig-blood scene. Very Halloweenish.

  21. Mister Bored

    @18 – I was just soooo close to being in before that type of response.

    Oh well… WHYTE POWAH! Enjoy that beatdown from Jethro. Idiot.

  22. Can't Stand Her

    Several years ago this bitch was F’n Flavio Briatore & tried to trap him into marriage by getting pregnant, against his wishes. As soon as she sprang her trap on him, he kicked her worthless ass out. Was a brilliant move on his part.

  23. Turkey Waddle

    I’m a woman and I think she’s breathtaking. You just cannot make Heidi Klum ugly. If she done these pics after giving birth, then more power to her. I love to hear stories of women snapping back in shape after having babies. It’s not all doom and gloom and stretch marks, ladies!

  24. pappy smeary

    I could easily jerk off to her giving birth!

  25. masmi

    Um number 18′s comment needs to be taken down immediately. Your behavior is unacceptable and sad.

  26. masmi

    Um number 18′s comment needs to be taken down immediately. Your behavior is unacceptable and sad.

  27. I Clouseau

    Those crazee Euros, always want you to touch their monkey!! Can’t wait till she’s 65 and flashing the saggy with her daughter on the Blue Coast…

  28. e-rock

    @ #20 Kiki- Nah, those puppies are certainly God given. Mine are actually paid for, and look pretty good, so I can spot implants a mile away (Bar Rafaeli, Salma Hayek, Allesandra Ambrosio- small but yes, Gisele Bunchden, again small but yes, Marissa Miller). As much as I would love to believe Heidi’s are fake, nope. She really was born perfect. Bitch. hahaha
    And can the racist idiots please go to some racist site, and stay the hell off of this one? Really, you give white people a bad name. Seriously.

  29. Jessica

    this are her POST PREGNANCY tits?

    nature is just sooo unfair

  30. __

    That is exactly what perfect brests look like. Fake, real, whatever. They’re 100% flawless.

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  33. KIKI

    @ 29: Do you like your surgery? If I was gonna get em done I would take in one of these photos, but you think it isn’t possible, huh? I hate the racist fucktards on this site as well.

  34. SoloBoy

    She may be dumb as a post and wed to a man-beast, but she’s still tasty!

  35. Dave


    No coochie?

  36. F2

    One girl, no cup?

  37. Ein

    If this shit isn’t photoshopped I can affirm she is some sort of arian experience done right.

  38. Ein

    I mean’t experiment.

  39. therusskie

    Kids or no kids, pic 16 is AMAZING! So sexy! I’m not gay, have a very happy sex life with my man, but I will say this: her behind looks AMAZING! Look at her little ‘package.’ Tell me which men would not wanna hit that?!

    So hawt! You go girl!

  40. ling

    hate to break it to you guys, but these pics are part genetics, part science (expensive treatments to stay young-looking/possible plastic surgery), part cosmetics, and part photoshop…

  41. Rosie

    Photoshop, kids, surgery, whatever Heidi looks good and you can’t take that away. She is IN!!

  42. Anon

    #14 Jade.
    I really got to you.
    If you have to say you’re not jealous then you are. And I believe you lost the weight when you had your sprog but what was your weight before you got pregnant?
    Nothing near Heidi I’ll bet.

    *waits for the obligatory comeback where she tries to convince us she had the same figure as Heidi*

  43. mike

    did seal melt on her?

  44. sunshine

    Your body can look like that after having children – if it looks that good before each pregnancy. You don’t immediately look like you are 9 months pregnant, it’s gradual. Stretch marks are genetic. some people get them, some don’t. But you can’t be carrying extra weight for years, then get pregnant on top of it and expect to look like this afterwards without medical help.

  45. cracka ass

    2nd pic is damn sexy.

  46. someguy

    If this doesn’t give you a throbbing boner then you at need to go out and buy a boner so you can beat off to those nipples.

  47. Gregg

    Either these are photoshopped or this is: http://www.ultra-celebs.com/hentai/heidi-klum/heidi-klum_07.jpg

    I’m betting these.

  48. Christina


  49. JonGosselin

    They’re fake.


    There isn’t enough support in that second bikini to turn nothing into perfect boobs. Nice boob job, though.

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