Heidi and Audrina’s breasts got cancelled

Civilization just became slightly less doomed. The Hills is going off the air after this season which essentially marks the end of Audrina Patridge and Heidi Montag’s careers, if that term even applies. Sure, they could fade away for a while, focus on their acting classes and try to land legitimate roles, but that’d be a tragic waste of fake tits. No, really, as I was typing this, the Indian from that TV commercial walked in here and shed a single, solemn tear.

Then whipped a tomahawk at me for using the word “Indian.” Dammit, Chief Squeezes Boobs!