Heidi Montag is Researching Stripping

Apparently Heidi Montag is still in the music business despite her album Superficial selling five copies, even with my name on it, because she plans on shooting a new video next week. That or she found a convenient excuse for all those job applications she filled out the other day. Via Twitter:

Going to Hustler strip club want to pick up some tips for my music video Ill do it that I am shooting next week

This might come as a shock to some people, but I’m actually on board with this. Think about it for a second: The end result will be a video we were all going to be subjected to anyway except now the large-breasted star has been trained by strippers. It’s like eating your last meal only to find a lap dance hidden in the mashed potatoes. Sure, a gun would’ve been nicer, but who’s going to argue tits aren’t the next best thing? It’s not like there’s a version of humans walking around with their own personal pair. Ha! Could you imagine? It’d be like a science fiction movie.

Photos: Splash News, WENN, WireImage