Heidi Montag celebrated her [Insert number of years since her manufacture here.] birthday in Vegas over the weekend where she demonstrated the latest feature in top of the line sex-dollery: Life-Like Drunkeness (Now With More Sloppy Bedwetting). On that note, I love this photo of her and Spencer which really captures a day in the life of their marriage. Mostly because he’s entirely oblivious to her gasping for air thanks to him going with the cheap, knockoff windpipe. “You’re just paying for the name,” he said.
Photos: Splash News, WENN
What an absolutely NOT-HOT mess.
Yikes…
WOOOF. the only word to describe her.
Man she was hot once, remember those fake/ poser pic stories she used to do with spencer, like the baywatch ones, now she looks shit shite,… wtf,… I mean how can some ppl not recognize what they are doing to themselves,… like the tanning bed-leatherskin thingy,… I don’t get it,… so fuckn sad :(
Would love to humiliate this bimbo by busting a thick, stringy one all over her face!
i would love to squeeze the milk out of her tits
Apparently Madonna had sex with her
You might want to google some urologists.
Semen should not be that stringy. Have u seen a doc?
Best looking 50 year old in hollywood!
How she is relevant completely eludes me.
“I said, I’m gonna go suck that guy’s dick! Be right back.”
“Don’t forget. It’s your birthday. No freebies!!”
After seeing this pictures, her plastic surgeon crawled out if his grave and drove himself off a cliff again.
Haha.
OMG, best one today!!
So winning!
I’m not usually one to put down a woman’s weight, but she’s built like a plastic barrel now.
Paper bags are free…
She really needs to do porn.
Lindsay is a hooker now, so why not.
I hear ya. Heidi literally looks like one of the latest batches of porno stars.
Fuck you. Lindsay is hot. Madonna is sexy as hell.
I really have to lol alot at the people who make fun of this gal…lets break it down::
. no talent
. lot of plastic surgery
. fake tits
…isnt that every single girl on every porn site that 99% of the guys on here beat off to every single day..??..??
Nah, if I beat off to a girl, it’s not a porno actress. It’s someone like Kelly Brook for example. Not me pal. I don’t find any porno slag scorching hot at all. Not even Tabitha Stevens.
Her posing in front of that “VANITY” sign= Palin posing in front of a “STOOPID” sign.
I’m not going to lie, she has a great body, she should have stopped with the implants after her first boob job though. They looked perfect then. The face is another story, a horse is a horse is a horse of course.
I haven’t heard a single rumor of her fucking anyone lately. Is this an indication that she can’t anymore? If not, she’d better work on suppressing her gag reflex.
Apparently Madonna is fucking her
She had it paved over when they were altering everything else. Because she looked at Spencer.
Heidi who?
How low can she go now?
How can we forget her if you keep bringing her up? Sheesh!
Probably took 36″ of #10 rebar up her ass to counteract all those pounds of silicon and get this bitch in an upright position.
If you look carefully at picture #6 you will see a scientific anomaly that should be front-page news worldwide: a woman with her asshole in front of her.
Love it !
guess what? i’m finding myself sexually attracted to the place where the side boob meets the arm pit and shoulder. that sexy, bald crease. what do you call that body part? anyway, i don’t find heidi attractive in any other area, but she has a sexy whatever that place is called, and i’d like to make love to it.
It won’t be long before she leaves Spencer for the cowbell player for Sly and the Family Stone.
Who am I kidding? I’d hit that in a second., even with the bionic jaw and man-made boobs.
That’s s dude.
“Spencer, look out! Death Eater behind you!!!”
A collection of parts indeed; Frankenmontag.
Donatella Versace is looking a lot better.
Is she fat now or is that just the dress?
her face looks awful.
she is not photogenic at all.
That’ll make the price of gold go down. Hefty, hefty, hefty.
At this point her wax figure would look more life-like than her.
“Oil…oil can”
Lol!
“Come at me, bro.”
I would so fuck that hoe!
Mouth still open, always. This chick probably never shuts up.
But I do love her, when will she do porn dammit.
Beware, for the creature must feed once every year on the sixteenth day of the ninth month! Watch in horror as it gorges itself upon the flesh of it’s own husband… hmm, partner?… business associate, yes thats it…
I’d bang the living hell out of her rear end!
she looked much better after the first boob job and nose job. Now she looks hideous! Aged herself by 15 years and looks trashy. The wig is repulsive as well. Im sick of all the fake hair. Is there any shame left amongst the people anymore? What, you remove your wig, eyelashes, spanx, make-up, eyebrows and smoosh your big plastic titties on someone and they don’t mind? I am truly perplexed.
I am sure there’s a perfectly rational explanation as to why her chin looks like Gaston’s.
HAHAHAHAHA
Looks more like a man than ever. Great job on the plastic surgery. Cheers
She was cute before she threw away all that money for the replacement parts. Cute, but stoopid!
Here comes the spew. RUN!!!
OMG! Is she turning into BritBrit?
Yes, Heidi. It is a tumor. It’s also cancerous. The sooner you have it removed, the better your chances of recovery.
She was cute once …
You say you hate this bitch and yet you post 31 (thirty-one) pictures of her… doing absolutely nothing.
God, she’s disgusting.
The plastic surgeon did the best he could with the masculine architecture that is her face but unfortunately he didn’t have the strength required to chisel down that jay leno chin.
She should fix her man-jaw.