Heidi Klum’s Cleavage Is The Crap We Missed

Welcome to the words below the breasts. It’s a little lonely down here, so I’ll pretend like some of you stuck around to find out why there’s a change in format today. Last night, Fish and I live-tweeted the Oscars, resulting in me not getting my usual headstart on an event-laden weekend along with a bee’s nest of crazy that’s not even worth mentioning. However, my Oscar weekend coverage did yield an event that I felt grasped the essence of what a Crap post normally includes. From the awkward, forced interactions with Steven Tyler or Chris Brown, to this side shot of Kim Kardashian that she would have you believe is all baby bump. This event really did have it all. Salvador Sanchez was there, as well as this magical creature that I’m almost positive is a unicorn and there was even a douchey smirk-down between Topher Grace and Ian Somerhalder.

Random boob, you ask? Ahaha, my children! Would I even bother otherwise? Your Crap post awaits below,

- Photo Boy

Photo: Getty, Splash News, WENN