Heidi Klum’s Breasts Will Make It All Better

November 12th, 2012 // 25 Comments

It’s been a tumultuous morning of love torn asunder and puppets having gay sex with minors (allegedly), so here’s Heidi Klum looking awesome at last night’s MTV EMAs to remind us that there’s still beauty in the world. Also, Taylor Swift did that thing where she actually looks hot and not the same old boring teenager who’s already writing a song about marrying you even though you only looked for one second. ONE SECOND.

Photo: Getty, Splash News, WENN


  1. The Royal Penis

    If this dress doesn’t say “cum on my tits”, I don’t know what woud.

  2. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and the winner of this year’s Best European Album goes to That Guy Who Plays Oompah Music Through His Butt!”

  3. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    The Royal Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    Hope she washes that hand when she’s done.

  4. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mmm…smooth. My ex-husband Seal—you know how his face is all cratered? His ass, too.” (Except in German.)

    • USDA Prime McRindfleisch

      Mmm … glatt. Mein Ex-Mann Seal-Sie wissen, wie sein Gesicht ist alles Kratern? Sein Arsch, auch.

      • I was originally going to post only the German version, but that wouldn’t be funny enough for most people. Also, I think “glätt” is the adverb and “glätten” is the adjective, but I could be wrong about that.

      • USDA Prime McBeef

        Just no russian posts and you should be OK. Fish hates cyrllic alphabets.

  5. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    European MTV has hot German moms spanking firm, young asses. American MTV has Teem Moms who didn’t get spanked enough. That seems fair.

    • Trek Girl

      The MTV awards and Teen Mom are two different things. Apples and oranges my friend, apples and oranges.

      • USDA Prime McBeef

        TG, you might just be an idiot.

      • Trek Girl

        Nope, I am not an idiot. I’m just pointing out who odd it is to lump an MTV music award moment with the show Teen Mom, even if it is for a joke. I just like being contrary, you know? Yeah, you know.

        I will say this, though: isn’t it crazy that the European MTV awards had a hot, German mom spanking firm young asses, and we got…well, not that. Pfftt, what a jip.

    • There’s a lot of wisdom in that statement.

  6. Don’t fall for the “sexy Taylor Swift” bit. She’s on the prowl for another poor soul to trap in her web, fuck him for a few months then reveal her clingy, psychopathic side. And when the dude inevitably drops her ass. she’s got material for her shitty music.

    Somebody needs to put a stop to this.

  7. Grand Dragon

    She isn’t fooling me, I’ve seen those fried egg tits uncovered on this site.

  8. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn. I’d let her into my camera room. Let her adjust the F-stop and everything.

  9. She has a really perfect face. But I can never get the VS show out of my mind where she’d just had a baby something like two months before. Her stomach was super lumpy and just strange looking. She’s back on point now, but MAN that was just too early for her to be on the runway after having a kid.

  10. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Seal is the biggest fool ever.

  11. richie

    Now you see why I watch Project Runway!

  12. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    tooo old!!!!

  13. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    My boner just exploded…I should probably see a doctor about that…

  14. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s where my 7th grade German comes in handy,
    Hot Fraulein!

  15. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d still tap that any day

  16. tlmck

    Maybe it’s the camera angle, but Heidi is looking a little wide these days.

  17. Heidi Klum Cleavage MTV EMA
    Commented on this photo:

    In or out… pick one.

  18. SFRowGuy

    That dress (!) couldn’t look worse if it was lying on top of a pile of trash. Someone got paid for that? The yellow belongs on the same pile.

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