Heather Locklear is MILF-esque when bikinified

April 25th, 2008 // 99 Comments

Heather Locklear is photographed here filming her new movie Flirting with 40. According to IMDB: “A divorced mother approaching her 40th birthday falls for a younger man while on vacation.” That’s funny because Heather Locklear is pushing 50 in real life. So Heather not only flirted with 40, it had its way with her then, ironically, ditched her for Denise Richards. True story that I’m willing to ignore to have sweet granny sex with Heather. Afterwards, we’ll snuggle up for some Matlock. See? I’m romantic.


  1. theseanshow

    …yes please

  2. ldsqtbea

    she looks good :) (at least i think she does)

  3. Airbrush Those Quick, Please

    I’ve never been impressed by this chick in any aspect. And now, even less.

  4. Eh...

    What is that above her crotch in her baithing suit? She’s alright I guess. For an old lady…

  5. gotmilk?

    wow, her hair is almost as thin as Richie Samboras.

  6. Somuchsoap

    Better than Denise Richards. I don’t think Heather’s had a kid. Kids mess you up.

  7. Over 40 Hottie

    Everyone is going to grow old someday, so why not maintain a hot body!

    Heather is hot!

  8. mimi


    What is Britney doing today?

  9. morga

    she looks real good for 35, much less 50

    though the knees/feet give it away

  10. They White Urkle

    Nice back fat! I would still stick it in her pooper hole though. She is still kind of hot.

  11. gotmilk?

    6, did you not hear about how her ex drove a car drunk with their child in it?

  12. Trover

    She is HAWT! MILF-a-licious!!!!!!!!!! My pee pee sings for her.

  13. YesAndNo

    yes, she has had a child. she looks great regardless of her age.

  14. tp

    FAT ASS!!!!!!!!!

  15. Seun

    White Girl ass. Noassatall!

  16. Diamond Dave

    This site should be renamed to “Gunts on Parade”

  17. bobby bo bo

    what’s that weird patch below her navel? The hernia scar?

  18. When did AARP take over the Superficial???

    Ok, cut it out. No more “…for her age” pictures. Please post pictures of girls who don’t need modifiers surrounding the word “hot.”

  19. Eh...

    #18 I agree! If I wanted to see this crap I would visit the Senior Citizens Center

  20. i bet she eat chinese foods. I’m not saying for sure, but I am pretty certain about it.

  21. MassGrrl

    Nice body. Ugly face without her makeup.

  22. Young hottie

    Like all the old chicks Fish has posted recently, her body has visibly fallen. Just check out the side views, which are always pitiless. An older chick can look pretty good, in the right light and make up and swimsuit and whatever else, but only from a head-on shot. From the back, you get your choice of either “UGH!” or a diaper look, if she’s picked the bikini that’s “right for her age”. But from the side, it’s like the rings on a tree trunk – a degree of droop for every year, until it looks like both her tit and her buttcheek lost something and are looking down at the ground for it.

  23. Ok, enough with the lean meat. I can get that shit at the soup kitchen. Get me some thing to chew on you jackass

  24. nipolian

    I’m sure that Scott Baio is somewhere jerking off to these pics. Just ask Howard Stern if you don’t believe me.

  25. Tatttoo Removal SCAR and Pain

    # 4 -

    That UGLY THING above her bathing suit bottom line is an obvious attempt at a tattoo removal. Why do all people over 15 think that tattoos will never be regrets someday is beyond me.

    There is no way to completely remove a Tattoo without any change to the under skin or the outline of the art. This means: SCARS AND DISCOLORATIONS way uglier than the original tattoo. Oh, did I mention great pain, too, if you think getting the tattoo was bad, the removal is 500% more pain and then there is the expense, did I mention the expense….

    The lesson for today is, if you want a tattoo kids, get a decal so you can change it everyday and the colors will stay fresh forever, or learn to live with your mistake.

  26. Ted Mosby

    She looks hot when she’s not trying to kill herself.

  27. Customer

    Say, this package has been opened and the expiration date passed a long time ago. When will the new products arrive?

  28. angela

    Maybe that discoloration is a make-up job for the movie that went awry in the water?

  29. VtFarmboy

    So like i was wacking off to pics of her when i was in high school back in the late 70′s….. looks like everything old is new again. I will give heather credit for keeping up the good looks. There are many younger babes that dont look half as good(britney spears)

  30. restingonlaurels

    @26, good call! makes me happy i never went through with that moon goddess tattoo i always wanted.

  31. Zim

    “There are many younger babes that dont look half as good(britney spears)”

    Ah yes. Make Britney the standard and sure, Heather looks pretty good. Well, Britney’s current body, to be exact. Britney’s pre-Kevin pre-babies body makes Heather look like an old lady in a bikini.

    Which reminds me – why are we looking at an old lady in a bikini? Again?

  32. ph7

    Is this old hags week on the Superficial?

    Jeez – what demographic are your trying to reach – granny chasers?

  33. bored

    Sooooooooo …. basically, it’s White People How Stella Got Her Groove Back?

  34. Ted from LA

    You’re all jealous because you know she gets 10% off at Denny’s.

  35. monkeyfightclub

    Her body looks pretty damn good. I’d insist that she take her dentures out before we commenced with the sexual relations.

  36. T

    OK I just added another hour to the workout tonight. I’m doing 4 hours on the elliptical and an hour on the treadmill. Maybe after I’ll run the 4 miles home.

  37. woeisme

    She is HORRIBLE looking and has been for decades. Major plastic surgery on her face, bad implants with nipples pointing at the sand, tats removed and ugly scarring left behind.


  38. Lindsay

    I keep seeing every attractive woman on this site has a comment regarding them that they’ve been on “meeting wealthy.com” etc. etc., – is this just a shameless plug from this website???

  39. Oreo

    #26–wrong, the discoloration is a most likely a birth control patch. Look up “Ortho Evra.”

    Save the diatribe.

  40. Sex Nuts & Retard Strong

    I would ruin her GILF ass, then, because I’m caring and sensitive, would rub Bengay and Aspercream on her aching granny joints and muscles.

  41. will

    @38-yes, they are identity spammers.

  42. Perry M. O'Pausal

    @39-Women pushing 50 don’t need the Ortho Evro patch – or any other birth control, you douche! Think back to 8th grade health class.

  43. Your Mom

    I liked it better when it was called “How Stella Got Her Groove Back”

  44. cookie monsta

    oh yeah, Heather looks WAY BETTER than the Richards SKANK …

  45. 80'sChild

    I wanted to be or look like Heather since her T.J. Hooker. Ironicly enough I was in love with T. Lee and…Richie !!!!! I still love the long hair !!!! Although I still love 80′ hair bands & “heavy metal. I’m a bit embaressed now !! Imagine that !!!!

    I say good for her !!!!

    Too bad good looks wasn’t universal ( as the norm ).


  46. 80'sChild

    Not to mention Brett Michaels even though short lived.

    God DAMN!!!!!!!!!! I should hide !!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!

  47. lisa

    looking good heather!

  48. Maritza

    She is looking quite good for her age. It’s not easy to maintain beauty once your 50, but Heather is doing a good job a it.

  49. S

    The spot above her bikini bottom is the Ortho Evra birth control patch.

  50. friendlyfires

    I like her little pot belly. Very sexy, for me.
    The sad story is she will not be a hot GILF when sixty knocks on her door. Nope, my spidey senses tell me she’s gonna inflate the same way Shirley Winters, Serena Blaquelord and Sally Struthers – hey, Marilyn Monroe was heading in that direction, so, maybe it’s for the better she left when she did, you know?

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