Heather Locklear was arrested by the California Highway Patrol for suspicion of driving under the influence of a controlled substance. She was picked up in Montecito after someone called 911 to report an erratic driver. The LA Times reports:
Locklear showed bizarre behavior, driving back and forth over a pair of sunglasses on the pavement and revving her engine. After leaving the parking lot, she stopped her car on the street and stumbled into the traffic lane, according to the caller, who followed Locklear out of concern, Marshall said.
When the CHP officer arrived, Locklear’s car was parked on State Route 192 partially blocking a lane, Marshall said. The officer talked to her and determined that she was disoriented and “under the influence of something.” She was taken to the CHP’s Santa Barbara-area office to be tested for alcohol and drugs.
Locklear tested negative for alcohol. Other drug tests will be returned in a few days, Marshall said.
Judging by her mugshot, there’s no way Heather Locklear will even realize she’s been arrested until at least Wednesday – of next week. On that note, I’m convinced she’s either trying to steal my soul or order a pizza telepathically. What’s that, Drug-Face? I don’t think “Denise Richards is a gaping whore” counts as a topping. But I’ll ask.
mike | September 29, 2008 at 9:02 am
asswpe fr
mike | September 29, 2008 at 9:02 am
asswpe fr
Ivanushka | September 29, 2008 at 9:04 am
actually, if you look past the “i just got hit in the freakin head with a iron frying pan” expression- she looks like of good for her age.
Ivanushka | September 29, 2008 at 9:05 am
actually, if you look past the “i just got hit in the freakin head with a iron frying pan” expression- she looks kind of good for her age.
Annik | September 29, 2008 at 9:08 am
5th?? :O
Dura | September 29, 2008 at 9:08 am
I’d still hit that.
mattk | September 29, 2008 at 9:10 am
Who gives a crap about the DUI…
She STILL looks that good wasted and with no makeup?
HOLY F, I would break one off in her… isn’t she like 50? Def. deal with Ol Mr. Splitfoot.
Rough Daddy | September 29, 2008 at 9:13 am
she’s morphing into Nick Nolte…
ph7 | September 29, 2008 at 9:17 am
She has from a smoking hot fuck to a batshit fuck. Nevertheless, still a great fuck. Except with a batshit fuck, you don’t spend the night or hand around for breakfast.
havoc | September 29, 2008 at 9:24 am
A wasted Heather Locklear is actually a dream come true….
I would hit that but for real……
.
Slut | September 29, 2008 at 9:25 am
Shit….I would have a drink too if I once dated Tom Cruise and Scott Baio…
zsfgnzb | September 29, 2008 at 9:27 am
Stupid white sheeple watching talmud-vision look exactly like that. Idiots.
Exo | September 29, 2008 at 9:28 am
My god women are pretty with those tearfilled eyes!
Could fill a whole wall in my apartment with pictures of crying females.
Not because I´m a sadistic bitch, tough.
They are truly angelic and so beautiful.
lloyd johnson | September 29, 2008 at 9:29 am
yeah considering this is a mugshot of a wasted 47 year old woman, I’d say she is smokin hot!
David ? | September 29, 2008 at 9:34 am
You guys talking about hitting it…go right ahead, with an open hand.
She was a bitch and a smelly one at that. I could never emphasize to her enough that she had to wash inside her vagina daily.
It just flat out stank. Like a pygmies pheromones on acid.
She drank so much it fermented her innards.
Ill bet Paul Newmans ass today doesnt stink as bad. Unless you use some of that shitty dressing he sold and donated .0000000001 % to charity.
youtube video | September 29, 2008 at 9:40 am
saolas?n
Giggles | September 29, 2008 at 9:43 am
$5 says this whole thing gets kicked….
Lola | September 29, 2008 at 10:04 am
WOW…. Like who cares? Paul Newman passed away. No one gives a fuck about this useless talentless bitch who’s husband left her for a chunky whore… To hell with all of Hollywood. These people get away with alot of shit regular people would be locked up for. Paris Hilton gets away with DUI and driving with no license. Lindsay Lohan, look at all that shit she did before, no jail time whatsoever. Shia LePoof 360 degree his car and nothing. Nick Hogan, practically kills his passenger and he’s getting out in 2 months or so. Now if this was any other “regular” person, I can guarantee they’ll be in jail for 5 years the least. Stupid fuckers… I hate em all
martin | September 29, 2008 at 10:07 am
“suspicion of driving under the influence of a controlled substance”: this one had me laughing out loud. what the hell of an accusation is this? that does not mean a thing. american crime system looks like as if it is based on pure moralism.
Mugato | September 29, 2008 at 10:07 am
“She’s screwed more musicians than Napster”
gotmilk? | September 29, 2008 at 10:12 am
her hair looks just as fried as richie samboras. i didn’t think that was even possible. the 80s really did a number on these whores.
La Rach | September 29, 2008 at 10:28 am
#20? yeah that was actually said about Pamela Anderson on her Comedy Central Roast. But whatevs, I guess.
gerard Vandenberg | September 29, 2008 at 10:32 am
I’m expected to have diner now!!
APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION?
Deacon Jones | September 29, 2008 at 10:36 am
Jesus, you guys are especially vicious this morning. The bitch is mid 40-something years old, give her a break. She looks like she’s 35.
That was my facial reaction when Andy Reid called a handoff to Buckhalter on 4th down last night in Chicago.
The Rock n' Roll floosie clown | September 29, 2008 at 10:52 am
KU KA KU KA KA KU!!! I DO COCAINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
church on sunday | September 29, 2008 at 11:11 am
why the fuck do so many celebrities think they’re entitled to drive like fucking retards, not even SLIGHTLY drunk, but fuckd out of their minds, endangering so many people? make an example outta this bitch like they did paris hilton. this shit is fucked
HorribleJudgment | September 29, 2008 at 11:15 am
God, look at her! She’s had so much plastic surgery I doubt she can even move her face! Aw, that explains her expression in the mugshot. :) Looks like her eyes, nose, lips, cheeks, chin, and forehead had work done. And a facelift as well. She looks for stretched out than Burt Reynolds!
Her eyes look retarded, like wide and propped that way permanently with toothpicks–disgusting and repulsive. And, oh my god, look at those horrific lips! Is she the joker now, or what?! The wall of time has hit this woman hard! So sad for her. :(
Jimbo | September 29, 2008 at 11:16 am
That’s exactly the expression a chick has when she’s totally wasted and it dawns on her that she just went ass to mouth.
oh yeah | September 29, 2008 at 11:19 am
Looks like she needs some facial cream
Harry | September 29, 2008 at 12:21 pm
Is this what happens to hot chicks when they hit the wall and realize nobody ever liked them for their mind?
ubee0173 | September 29, 2008 at 12:21 pm
cokehead
blah | September 29, 2008 at 12:27 pm
All I wanna know is…why the heck does it look like Heather is sporting some sideburns in that picture??? Seriously, wtf?
Prof | September 29, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Now pay attention kids, here’s what Heather Locklear’s exact “moment of clarity” looks like right… NOW!
Message Paid For By The California Highway Patrol.
Ted from LA | September 29, 2008 at 12:53 pm
Her pupils look like two cell phones.
jennifer | September 29, 2008 at 1:29 pm
I hope she can get the help she needs. Obviously it’s more than rehab. She still looks DAMN good.
Ted from LA | September 29, 2008 at 1:46 pm
I’ll bet her poop smells good.
Id like to feel it.
Mike | September 29, 2008 at 2:11 pm
@36
I eat my neighbor’s with a knife and fork
jennifer_hammond | September 29, 2008 at 2:14 pm
Someone needs to notify her hair stylist that the 90′s are over. Gawd, that hair is so blelached and fried out.
Tammy | September 29, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Everybody goes to the zoo from time to time….When you’re famous, the public goes with you.
Flubbermaid | September 29, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Hey, Mommie, how can you tell if someone is fu*ked up out of their loopy-loop mind?
Well, Dearie, you look at their eyes.
Their eyes??
Yes, Dearie, their eyes. You see their eyes will be like two big, black saucers full of nothing. It’s called pupil dilation, dear.
Oh!! Like Heather Locklear when she got nailed?
No, dear, not like that. She’s been nailed so many times she doesn’t even react anymore. She’s numb. It’s like when they took her mug shot after she was arrested for driving while stoned out of her fu*king mind.
Oh, THAT time! Now I understand.
Good, Dearie. Now, go back to grinding up the kittens…
Flubbermaid | September 29, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Run!!! She has Bender eyes! Robot Satan is surely coming!
arroyo | September 29, 2008 at 4:33 pm
oh please, that’s her driver’s license picture i.d.
malicious | September 29, 2008 at 5:05 pm
so their kid has two wastoid parents who get hammered behind the wheel and need rehab
SueMe | September 29, 2008 at 5:25 pm
Yeah I heard about this that she was straight wiggin out.
Starcasm | September 29, 2008 at 5:52 pm
Starcasm.net has a strand of Heather’s hair! Oooooooo – what will the lab tests show?
We miss you Heather! How in the world didn’t you get a roll on Desperate Housewives? Maybe the CW will reprise Melrose like they did 90210. That network seems to understand that America owes a great deal of gratitude to the uber-bitches of bad television!
Thomas | September 29, 2008 at 7:06 pm
She got treated for anxiety earlier this year, I would bet anything it was benzo related like Xanax or Klonopin.
Narcissist | September 29, 2008 at 7:13 pm
At least she didn’t have Jocelyn Wildenstein face in her mugshot.
Jack | September 29, 2008 at 11:12 pm
Got Milk?
dfdfdfd | September 30, 2008 at 4:29 am
Last.
Flubbermaid | September 30, 2008 at 11:54 am
Lastest.