Health Experts Call Another Gwyneth Paltrow GOOP Diet BS

Look, after hearing about how Gwyneth Paltrow had to deal with Harvey Weinstein in a hands-on hotel meeting, I wanted to give her a pass on some of her GOOP nonsense. Unfortunately, that’s damn near impossible when they keep cheating rich suckers into thinking that their health bars and vagina crystals will cure all ailments and make dudes want to bang them.

The latest comes from celebrity diet guru Tracy Anderson, who published a piece on GOOP, which claims you could lose 14 pounds in 4 weeks if you cut out carbs, work out constantly, and eat the crappy meal replacement bars for sustenance (and flavor!). One of the flavors is called Sport Cherry Pie, and health experts immediately called them out because you can’t eat fucking sports.

GOOP representatives responded with the same kind of non-binding mumbo jumbo that you hear on the Home Shopping Network…

The company has responded to claims that it is endorsing an unhealthy and “potentially harmful” diet plan after it published weight loss advice from celebrity fitness guru Tracy Anderson.

In a statement to E! News, a representative for Goop said, “We would never advocate for an unhealthy diet or extreme routine. As Tracy said in the interview, you should make choices based on what is best for your individual body.” (from E! News)

Basically, they’re saying: “We’re legally obligated to say that this might not work because it probably doesn’t but fuck you, we’ll take your money for Sport Cherry Pie bars and vagina crystals because our business revolves around suckers who hate themselves.”

Maybe I should invest in some diet bars with crazy flavors like Pussy Magnet Mango and Banana Dick Blast. Then, tell people that it may or may not help them get laid. Dudes in India would totally buy that shit up.

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