Hayden Panettiere reads to children, I won’t hold it against her

October 15th, 2007 // 68 Comments

Hayden Panettiere spent an afternoon reading to schoolchildren. I can think of better ways for her to spend her time. They involve me, several palm branches, and a bowl of grapes. Also, nudity. Mostly her, not so much me. I’ll be wearing a tux. Sometimes I like to pretend I’m James Bond. If that rental place forgets the poison-dart cuff links, I’m going to be pissed. Clearly, those people have no sense of romance.

Note: For those of you who wonder if NBC pays me to write posts about Hayden Panettiere, the answer is no. However, I’m not opposed to the idea. NBC, feel free to call me at 1-888-LUV-HAYP. I accept cash, gold bars and/or rare religious artifacts that can melt a man’s face off. No PayPal.

Photos: Splash News

  1. fuckpeople

    Binky, most people are mindless brainwashed sheep, why do you even bother?

  2. Andrew C

    I give her a year before she turns into the next Lindsay Lohan.

  3. TetterkeT

    Am I the only one who thinks this bitch is fat?

  4. Good for her ! Its nice to see a celebrity doing something positive

  5. Auntie Kryst

    @54 Yes you are right, with a full cadre of photographers to capture the PR event. Bet this wee tart doesn’t do shit unless it’s a photo-op, selfish little twerp.

  6. Mike

    #53, i think she is plump. she is short and stumpy and will prob never have the body of a grown woman. she looks like a cute 13 year old, but im not into that so much.
    she was a child actress, it is good when child actors are naturally short because they have a longer shelf life for childrens roles, and can act better than somone younger but the same size.
    unfortunately, she is no longer a child. she will always have stumpy-ness and child like proportions. her face is pretty… but it isn’t enough.

  7. mooty

    excellent choice of outfit for reading to children in. really. bravo hayden. but can you shift around in your seat a little, i don’t think i can QUITE see your brunch.
    and why can not a single hollywood dog walk without holding a cup of something in their hand? does it balance them out or something?

  8. ness

    oooh i bet all the kiddies were paying real close attention!!!

    to her CROTCH!

  9. I like her…shes cute. Its nice to see a celeb be normal for once. I just hope she stays good.

  10. kitty_kat

    She’s not nearly as famous as she thinks she is.

  11. chickiepie

    I’d like to let you know….I got the reference to Indiana Jones. Did anyone else?

  12. LiSA

    That bitch needs to do something about those nasty caterpiller eyebrows, with all that money, you know she can afford to get them waxed.

  13. Manny

    This chick’s no dumb blonde. And I highly doubt she’ll end up like all the other broken in, party freaks in Hollywood.

    And her eyebrows are fine.

  14. DUH

    Hayden is definitely cute but is NOT hot. She has a pudgy body that looks like a little kid’s. I’m sorry. Pretty face, ugly body.

  15. DUH

    #56 I totally agree with you.

  16. Chauncey Gardner

    I wonder how many orgasms she can have in a row before she’s too tired to continue?

  17. Gloria

    she is so lovely in this blue dress, her profile on sugarcupid.com is also popular.

  18. Rafa

    you’re all stupid…

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