Hayden Panettiere licks butts

June 27th, 2007 // 107 Comments

I get the feeling these are old, but they’re making the rounds on the ol’ interweb so I’m putting them up anyway. They’re personal shots of Hayden Panettiere – the cheerleader from Heroes - licking a statue’s butt and then, um, paying her friend to spank her? I guess? She doesn’t turn 18 for another two months, so whatever you’re thinking it’s probably illegal. Unless you happen to be thinking about a cure for cancer. That’s, you know, especially illegal.


  1. She’s just fooling around. No bid deal. Blah, people just don’t have anything better to comment about.





  3. MassGrrl

    amma must be a fat, old spinster. :-)

  4. haha I love her! Click on my name for more!

  5. Madonna

    Like I said people were doing “FIRST” back in 1996. It’s old as balls. I’ll do a search on googles archive and show you. I ain’t doing that fuck that. People who still do “first” just discovered the internet or something. It’s embarrassing. I’d fuck Hayden Pantiesassierre.

  6. jrmafia27

    everytime I see pics of her the words I and LOVE and YOU come to mind.

  7. Rachael

    Bern you rock. you never fail to brighten my day at work! Love the swear jar clip!

  8. Jimbo

    @54 Cassie – No naked picture of you on your site?

  9. Rachael

    I think i might put one on my reception desk!

  10. Jimbo

    Can I have one?

  11. GOD

    I agree with all of what you said except that there is nothing lamer than paying for internet porn.

    To actually spend money to look at naked whore’s who does that? Obviously it’s the ugly, the deformed, the fat, the lonely, the current and future rapists, the lamer than lame, and those who have no chance of seeing, touching or doing a real live naked person. In a word; MEN.

    I come here because of my rampant hatred of celebrities. The ass on here is only impressive to virgins and those who live in small towns filled with ugly people.

    Honestly whether you pay for porn or not it’s an insanely pathetic addiction. How many hot girls have to pay for nudity or go on line to find it? That’s why most women don’t spend their money “going to the nudy bar man”. A hot chick can snap her fingers and get it (it being whatever the ‘fuck’ she wants) any second. Men on the other hand being the genetic douchebags that they are ALWAYS have to pay for it (just a glimpse of nipple, a whore’s tit in the face, a little dance around their lap pinky etc…). Whether it’s with a credit card on-line, singles at the local fatty filled strip club or a shitty chick flick and some stale popcorn; MEN are always going to have to pay for skin.

    Life’s a bitch, and so is GOD

  12. proteon

    Who the fuck is this chick? She is almost as hot as your garden varitey internet porn star but I suspect it would take way more effort to see her vagine. By way more effort I mean a few years of miserable D list fame and a few dozen slimy paparazi.

  13. Chauncey Gardner

    Hey, God – you don’t exist.

  14. It turns out The Almighty Our Lord God is a bitter woman in a house dress.

  15. What an idiot.

  16. MissPMS

    I heard she rimmed Wilmer Valderaama while she fingered his vagina.

  17. Mia

    You might not like they’re opinion, but god and amma are fucking right…

  18. #28 that’s funny. I’m hoping that it’s not true.

    She’s always licking stuff. Wasn’t she licking the stanley cup a while back, too?

  19. Chauncey Gardner

    Mia, GOD, Amma, et al -

    You’re missing a key reasons why Men pay for porn/sex:

    A lot of Women are rotten, self-centered, spoiled, temperamental cunts, and we don’t always want to deal with their fucking shenanigans. Pornstars, strippers and whores don’t fucking *judge* Men. They know why you’re buying what they sell, and they’re happy to have the business.

    What they DON’T do is *withold* it, because you forgot to do the fucking dishes, or stayed out late with your friends, or ducked out of going to the in-laws’ house on Thanksgiving. You can fucking go to sleep afterwards if you feel like it and not wind up being a ‘pig’ because you didn’t stay up for three hours listening to her complain about stupid, menial shit that only Women care about.

    Besides, even if you have a girlfriend or wife, you’re still ‘paying’ for sex. Bitches are expensive, whether they’re pros, or cunts like you. So, why shouldn’t Men pay for some sex that doesn’t have ‘opinions’ about everything? Why not pay for a broad that you don’t have to go down on everytime you get a blowjob – IF you get a blowjob.

    I can’t imagine what turns you bitches on, other than being self-righteous puritanical cunts, but even YOU have your proclivities. Maybe it’s phallic-shaped vegetables or trashy romance ‘novels’, or, maybe just the rush of being in ‘control’ of sex all the time is what turns you on. Whatever the case, we all know you fucking masturbate just as much as anyone else, and you love guys with money. That makes you sluts and whores to some degree, so get off the pulpit.

    Honestly, what I recommend for you bitches who complain about Men and sex is RITUAL GENITAL MUTILATION. If you’re that offended by sex and what people will do to get it, give back all the presents and money men have bought you just so you’d let them into your dirty slits, cut off your clits, and go be ‘good little girls’.

    And, whatever you do, SHUT THE FUCK UP and don’t play in this playground. We’re sick of hearing your shit all the time.

  20. Chauncey Gardner

    Oh, by the way…

    One more reason why pornstars, strippers and hookers appeal to men: they’re hotter than you are.

  21. vodka

    thats not vodka on the table in the bottom left hand corner

  22. Vegas

    I have six words and three letters for you:
    “Hi, I’m Chris Hanson from Dateline NBC.”

  23. GOD

    Oh Chauncey it looks like someone is still bitter about what happened in the “garden” of Eden.

    Boy some bitch or bitches must have really messed you up BAD. Defensive much?
    With just one little post on my end you and ‘Madonna’ got your tighty whities in a big old bunch. Just remember that constriction isn’t good for your ‘package’ which if I don’t exist begs the question; Why are you always praying and begging me to make it bigger?

    You must have been with some real pieces of work. I would have been offended but none of what you wrote applies to me (you basically described the opposite of me but I’ve met lots of annoying, whiny, “blah blah blah”, money hungry, teases that fit your description perfectly) but thanks for throwing generic insults my way which only show what kind of miserable whores you and your manhood can attract.

  24. Kevin Kunreuther

    Just so you know, she tosses my salad regularly, and uses a special garnish when she feels especially rambunctious. Oooo, I’ve been spritzed, I gotta go!

  25. Mia


    You say that women are selfish, self-centered bla bla bla…

    But all your post shows that MEN are selfish and self-centered. MEN don’t want to listen to women, MEN want to hang out late, MEN want to have sex to way they want it, men only care about their own pleasure, etc. What a poor, unsignificant, selfish stupid dick you are. No surprise you have to pay for sex.

    Oh, and 1 thing porn star, hookers and strippers don’t have that we, regular girls, have : a brain.

    And many things they actually have that we don’t : std.

    And I won’t teach you about historical reasons why women want a man with money and power cause obviously, you’re not smart enough to understand and accept it. You are what I like to call an intellectual homosexual. You prefer men, you prefer their company, attitude, manners and thinking and you dislike and HATE women. You only want them to empty your puny balls. Thats all. I’m happy you pay for sex, cause I wouldn’t any respectful and intelligent member of my own gender to have to deal with you. Hookers and strippers are paid for it. And they are well paid to endure your company.

  26. Men are disgusting for looking at porn? That is such an archaic bullshit statement. There is nothing wrong with an adult looking at sexually explicit content in the privacy of their own home, as long as they use discretion when kids can see.

    I did note: Chauncey did say a LOT of women, not ALL women. Props for that, at least. Some of us have no problem with sex–I happen to publish erotica.

  27. frenchie

    Who is this homely girl? Nothing like a big Texas blonde weave on a plain jane bore-a-roma. Ugh…those side sweptbangs! That dotted purple skirt with a contrasting dotted pink waistband! Those A&F jeans! This better be 8 years ago! WTF!!!

  28. Mia

    And by the way, if you’re attracted only to ”hot” girl, no surprise that you are a little bit disappointed when your balls are empty.
    These skank on this site, like alessandra, jessica and jessica and jessica and paris and all those hot girls are hot cause they are selfish. To look like they look they have to stand a long time in front of their mirror. They have to care about theirselves, they’re mean, superficial and egoistic. What do you expect from these girls, silly?? That their job to be self-centered! Find yourself a regular cute girls who allow herself to go out without makeup, who can talks about something else than the newest comestic product, who is independant, who can pay her own bills. Find yourself someone normal. Not a selfish, hot bitch like your penis want. You have a brain up there. You are no more an animal. Just pretend you are an evolved being.

  29. Mia


    And A LOT of men are disgusting pigs who hate women only because we don’t serve them anymore.

  30. DigDug

    Looks like The Butterscotch Stallion has met his match, oops I meant to say Owen Wilson.

  31. Mia

    Maybe men are those who should do the ”genital mutilation” thing. Cut off your dick and your balls. Maybe you’ll start thinking with your brain.

    And don’t say it is in your nature to be like this cause human beings are animals. Animals do not denigrate and enslave the other sex. Animals do not rape, beat up, mutilate, humiliate the other sex. Animals do not want to soil the other sex. Animals don’t hate the other sex. Only men do this. And they try to find some reason to treat women like this. They say we are selfish, that we cost a lot. Stupid dicks. You put us in this situation where we didn’t have money, where we weren’t allowed to possess, to work and to inherit. You made us eternal minors who depend on you. And you blame us for it?? Leave us the fuck alone! We are a loving, peaceful, smart and useful gender. You are a destructive, agressive and stupid one and you are jealous cause women can give birth and have multiple orgasm.

    And don’t come and say that i’m a frustrated and agressive bitch. I’m independant, smart, I buy more presents to my boyfriend than he does and I want more sex than he wants. I’m not a cliché woman and I bet that there are more women like me.
    You ask for this shit by speaking about horrible practices like genital mutilation in such a superficial way. You ask for it and I give it to you. So don’t say that i’m selfish and not generous.

  32. AnyTime

    STOP pursing the lips…STOP IT, STOP IT, just f’in STOP IT!!!!!!

  33. miss oblivious

    #34; okay, I see your point. I kind of get it now. But then I still don’t think she’s particularly attractive. I would think there are many much more attractive typical young blonde cheerleader types out there than her. And my gosh, the hostility on here! Let’s face it; people are people, whether they are male or female; some are assholes, some are not. I personally love men and am about as heterosexual a woman as you can get. Yes, for the most part men’s and women’s minds work differently (espc during “hormone” time); but it all comes down to the individual. There’s good and bad in all. Just remember that, before you both stereotype everyone. I’ve met plenty of whiney, bitchy men in my day. As well as plenty of aggressive, demanding women. But I’ve also met wonderful people of both sexes. And as for the person who posts as “God”, thats pretty arrogant and nervy to post as God, whether you’re kidding or not. I find it hard to believe someone who would do that is not an egotistical person or someone w/ a really low self esteem…or maybe just a weirdo.

  34. Wanky

    shes hot! i wanna tap that!

  35. farty_mcshitface

    hmm, so she likes to toss salads. or at least it looks like she is prepping herself for the day when she scores herself a piece of ass.

  36. astella

    what a lindsay lohan wannabe.
    monitor her closely, she might start spinnin’ bread knives next.

  37. stranger

    i think the friend is paris hilton.

  38. Chauncey Gardner

    Mia -

    If you’re life is so ideal and your boyfriend treats you well then stop fucking complaining and go suck his dick. He deserves it, after all the passive-agressive psychotic anti-male bullshit you probably subject him to.

    GOD -

    It’s ironic that you chose “GOD” as your moniker, because you singlehandedly created this flamewar with your defensive anti-male rant. Go suck Mia’s boyfriend’s dick. He probably deserves it just because.

  39. wedgeone

    #14 – so long as she doesn’t run the Starving Nachos, John Mayer, Wilmer V., Joe Francis, Josh Henderson, Brandon Davis circuit picking up all of Paris’ and Lilo’s diseases, let the baring of the flesh ensue!!

    #23 -LMAO: nice comeback. But if that’s you in #26, you wore it out too quickly.

    #69 -70: Chauncey – I wish that you would have posted the executive summary to your doctoral thesis first instead of second. It would have saved a bunch of time that way. Try to help a brother out in the future, plz.

    I found the link to Hayden licking the friend’s tit:

    All we can say about this little hottie is … “CAN A NIGGA GET A TABLE DANCE!?”

  40. kix

    Another classy American. Lucky us.

  41. elliot

    the friend is hotter by far

  42. Mia


    A believe there are certain limits in what is acceptable and what is not. And talking about genital mutilation is not. I hope your just a stupid teenager who says anything that would make him cool, cause if your and adult, your just a psychopath. This site is called ”the superficial”. That means you talk about this girl, how stupid she looks, about her clothes etc. There are too much racist, sexist, nationalist and xenophobic comments in here.
    Being agressive doesn’t make you look cool. Grow up, start thinking, and someday maybe you’ll regret all those horrible comments you’ve said. Or you will just finish your life in prison. Or in a wal mart.

  43. Mia

    And for your information, I don’t suck my boyfriend’s dick. But he’s the one who lick my pussy, cause I deserve it. CASSÉ.

  44. CountDrunkulaXxX

    right on Mia!! Its cool to be sarcastic, even a jerk… but when you start talking about banging little girls, thats where the line gets crossed.

    Ya’ll could learn a thing or two from Mia!!

    leave her the hell alone! This girl will be 18 in a few months… then all of you horny bastards can say all the degrading things that you want.

    And it is NOT all guys nature to want to hit up a little girl. My husband is soo grossed out by things that typical men like. Not every man is a pig… apparently, just the ones who frequent this site! But with all the nip slips and shots of coochies, who can blame ya??

    Seriously… cool off til this thing turns 18. Then, Ill join in on the hootin’ and hollerin’ as well!

  45. lambman

    she’s cute, talented and seems like lots of fun….and yeah she has some bad friends like Paris Hilton and the Laguna Beach boyfriend of hers….but since she has a full time job its a bit harder for her to get in trouble.

    plus she hates Lindsay, and you know that will be one hell of a catfight!!

  46. Spanky McFish

    That butt statue is at a restaurant called Trattoria dell’Arte on 7th Avenue in Manhattan.

  47. omg, what’s the big deal. that’s some old picture.
    you’ve never liked an ass before?

  48. What a sweet girl.

  49. Italian Stallion

    @97 I like all kinds of ass (on women). I think what you may have been trying to say is “you’ve never licked* an ass before”. Maybe you should take some of that “extra income” and buy yourself some English lessons, fucktard………

  50. Lick mine ;)

    Is what i’d say if I was a perv.

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