In case you haven’t received your government-issued telegraph informing you of the news yet, Hayden Panettiere has bangs now. However many pots of gold she offered her publicist it seems to be worth it considering this is seriously the most pervasive celebrity item of the day. So here’s Hayden trying to save the whales last night by offering what I can only assume is rear-entry midget sex. I’ll take two, please. Because sea lions mermen whales truly are the delicate flowers of the ocean. (Is cuddling mandatory?)
Photos: Getty, Pacific Coast News, WENN
MikeD | November 16, 2009 at 3:42 pm
The sight of this broad makes me want to butcher a dolphan…
Veronica | November 16, 2009 at 3:46 pm
Dolphin.
Career ending alarm going off in T minus 2 years… Book that Playboy shoot now.
SO RIGHT | November 16, 2009 at 3:46 pm
Here’s my feeling about bangs…very few people look better with them and those people have perfect noses, big lips and nice eyes. If you have a round face already (like Hayden), don’t get bangs.
Mr Obvious | November 16, 2009 at 3:47 pm
Someone has to say it…. I would totally “bangs” her.
Actually, I read the headline as “Hayden Panettiere has bang EVERYTHING.”
Bella | November 16, 2009 at 3:48 pm
oh jeez
glace neuf | November 16, 2009 at 3:48 pm
let me be the first to make an awful pun about BANGing her. wait, does that count? if not, then i would make like her haircut and BANGs her until i laid some ropes on her forehead…
Crusty | November 16, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Picture # 3 shows panty lines. Go thong or go nadda..
BangingAGirlWithBangs | November 16, 2009 at 3:54 pm
Midget sex with a girl with bangs would be awesome.
cherry | November 16, 2009 at 3:59 pm
not doing a whole lot for her
Joe S | November 16, 2009 at 4:06 pm
” 3. SO RIGHT – November 16, 2009 3:46 PM
Here’s my feeling about bangs…very few people look better with them and those people have perfect noses, big lips and nice eyes. If you have a round face already (like Hayden), don’t get bangs.
”
Well, thankfully, no one really follows your advice, eh? Being that Hayden looks far better WITH bangs than without.
Jessie | November 16, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Hate to break it to everyone but those bangs are fake… look at pic #22.
Photoshop Police | November 16, 2009 at 4:14 pm
BANGatierre!
dee | November 16, 2009 at 4:16 pm
SHE’S WEARING A WIG PEOPLE! It’s so damn obvious!
Mitch Haase | November 16, 2009 at 4:39 pm
I am not gay in any way shape or form, I just don’t find her even remotely attractive.
Jay | November 16, 2009 at 4:40 pm
It it just me, or does that look like a wig? she looks cute. I would like to swap bodily fluids with her.
assman | November 16, 2009 at 4:44 pm
i’d hit it
Taz | November 16, 2009 at 4:51 pm
I’d put it in her whale tail
casualencounters.com/blog/ | November 16, 2009 at 4:54 pm
That dress is hideous.
jlylec | November 16, 2009 at 4:56 pm
christ she’s hot and would get it all. aallllll.
ohwell | November 16, 2009 at 4:59 pm
she looks like a little person version of kim catrall…
Barf | November 16, 2009 at 5:01 pm
She looks as old as her mother. Yuk
Superfan | November 16, 2009 at 5:17 pm
Good job fish!
hugh | November 16, 2009 at 5:27 pm
Yeah I think it is a wig – the color the way it seems like the hair is one piece up close rather than seeing any scalp – - whew – that’s good. It’s ok but not nearly as flattering as her natural hair
mafme | November 16, 2009 at 5:30 pm
Aww she made herself look like an old lady.
Sport | November 16, 2009 at 5:33 pm
We can all say whatever we want at the keyboard but COME ON, when fucked up one weekend who wouldn’t hit a tiny little cheerleader? No matter what her hair or clothes look like it wouldnt take a thick set of beer goggles to wreck this check one night.
sit-down comedy | November 16, 2009 at 5:34 pm
Between the ‘bangs’, her yellow tongue, and an opportunity to make some sort of ‘sperm’ whale joke, I’d expect a little more creativity from you morons. You all need to work a lot fuck harder than this.
sit-down comedy | November 16, 2009 at 5:34 pm
Between the ‘bangs’, her yellow tongue, and an opportunity to make some sort of ‘sperm’ whale joke, I’d expect a little more creativity from you morons. You all need to work a lot fuck harder than this.
cowsandchickenunite | November 16, 2009 at 5:47 pm
PHUCK YOU WHALE !!!!!! PHUCK YOU DOLPHINE!!!!!!
Poopy | November 16, 2009 at 5:49 pm
she does look a lot older…and at first I had no clue what #26-27 were saying but yes her tongue is yellow….uber sexy!!!…NOT
ehh | November 16, 2009 at 5:51 pm
no thanks
ehh | November 16, 2009 at 5:51 pm
no thanks
yeahright | November 16, 2009 at 6:07 pm
She looks exactly like a young Rebecca Demornay (spelling?)- the hooker in “Risky Business”, nanny in “Hand that Rocks the Cradle”, assuming any of y’all are old enough to remember those…
kingofbeer | November 16, 2009 at 6:09 pm
Reminds me of young Goldie Hawn.
Turd the third | November 16, 2009 at 6:19 pm
She should have ditched the panties and gone for a whale tail… they spoil those ass shots. Maybe she should be called hayden pantiederiere
Having said that I’d hit it or bang her or check out here whale tail… at least she doesn’t have a bad case of manface, is a refreshing change to see an estrogen face.
jkhjkh | November 16, 2009 at 6:32 pm
pic #10: mustache and yellow tongue.
See Alice | November 16, 2009 at 7:54 pm
Is she taller than a gnome ?
vomitorium | November 16, 2009 at 7:57 pm
A. Who writes this vapid and childish shit? and B. Who the fuck is this not-so-attractive fireplug-like person?
Hefe | November 16, 2009 at 8:24 pm
I hate to say it but she is starting to look less-hot to me.
I’m sad to admit that too.
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kate | November 16, 2009 at 9:05 pm
oh my gosh, i think she looks SOOO much better! i’ve never understood the appeal of this girl… always thought she was very ordinary looking, even less than ordinary. but she looks pretty here!
whatever | November 16, 2009 at 9:39 pm
i have never seen a young girl seem so eager to look 35 years older than she is (5-10 years maybe – but that’s to *seem* more sophisticated sexy – like megan fox – not more ‘mother-of-the-bride’). she looks like a well preserved woman pushing 60. i find her very unattractive either way, but this just ages her in a bad way. she is obviously insecure about being a tiny little midget…as she probably should be.
cheadles | November 16, 2009 at 10:27 pm
This chick has a moon face. Plus she’s a midget & a heavy smoker (and according to people on set, a nose picker), so I think I’ll pass on her.
P.S. The bangs make her look even dumber.
micro sd | November 16, 2009 at 10:52 pm
Seriously, what is wrong with her? Girlfriend never gets it right with the hair and clothes. Jeez.
MissAttitude | November 17, 2009 at 12:08 am
Hello, little Kim Cattrall.
Foreign_Guy | November 17, 2009 at 12:16 am
36.
She seems a little bit taller than an average gnome, obviously shorter than a dwarf.
gifts for men | November 17, 2009 at 1:09 am
She is really looking pretty cool i must say. Her eyes are really appealing . She is looking quite taller than average.
ugg boots sale | November 17, 2009 at 6:23 am
She is really looking pretty cool i must say. Her eyes are really appealing . She is looking quite taller than average.
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1moreidiotintheworld | November 17, 2009 at 6:48 am
She tries WAAAYYYYYYY too hard to look like something that she is not – even remotely attractive. She is only good for one thing: Whale food. C’mon bitch save those poor starving whales……………….
saywha? | November 17, 2009 at 9:06 am
she looks fine here. if you’re bashing this chick for dressing classing while attending an event for a good cause, then you people really need to get lives. talk to me when she does something to embarrass herself. morons.