Hayden Panettiere causes milk explosion – literally

August 23rd, 2007 // 114 Comments

Hayden Panettiere will be featured in an upcoming “Got Milk?” ad. People Magazine provided these details:

‘You don’t have to be a hero to feel invincible. That’s why I drink milk,’ she says in the ads, part of a campaign to get teens to drink three glasses of low-fat or fat-free milk a day. The ads, debuting Sept. 10, were shot in May by famed photographer Annie Leibovitz and show Panettiere in a sleek red dress holding an exploding glass of milk.

This picture represents everything that is good and pure in the world. I feel like a small child waking up and scampering down the stairs to see his presents for the first time on a snowy, Christmas morning. Except, now, the tree is in my pants.


  1. hill

    frist… wow

  2. hill

    she still looks 12…. like a 12 yr old jon benet….

  3. Way too young. Call me when she’s in her 20′s.

  4. Crap Tonight

    Is she being groomed to be our next Lindsay Lohan?

  5. mp

    i don’t like her eyebrows

  6. kudos

    Ok, this is definitely a different writer.

  7. lambman

    “Smash Hit by Hayden”

    Am I the only one who thinks her decision to release an album is REALLY REALLY REALLY poorly advised? She can’t sing, and trying to balance acting, singing and not dying of an over-dose hasn’t exactly worked out for anybody….I guess J. lo worked it for about 2 years before everybody stoped giving a crap about anything she did….and I guess there’s Mandy Moore, but she’s not exactly a record breaking musician.

  8. Lovely

    I don’t like her mustache

  9. pointandlaugh

    #3 — she just turned 18. You are free to hit it.

  10. Monkey Sponkey

    Exploding glass of milk….hmmm. Methinks I sense some subliminal sexual message there. En espanol, some men call thier spunk “leche.”

    WOW, no subtlety there, eh?

  11. lambman

    ps, she does look great there. but there is something very unnatural and baby-doll like about her appearance

  12. wedgeone

    The thing is…she doesn’t look hot and sexy, she looks pissed. It’s probably what she’d look like for real – you’ve got to cum on their faces BEFORE they get famous (and uppity).

  13. SHallow Val

    7. lambman

    LOVE the J. Lo dig. Very nice. Finally everyone is on the same page.

  14. Cold Slap

    she’s cute but not sexy

  15. …….tree is in my pants……..dying of laughter here……..

  16. Texas Tranny


    I just had an explosion in my pretty panties.

    Tee Hee

  17. RichPort

    That glass o’ milk looks peculiarly like the end result of my last Hayden tugjob… relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax… I made sure to wait until her birthday… last year.

  18. Rob


  19. ssdd

    Fish.. lol

  20. p0nk

    She has a ripe little body, but she doesn’t look like she wants to fuck. That was perfect for the pedo fantasy that every guy has, but now that she’s 18 it’s a total turnoff.

  21. Texas Tranny

    If she keeps her pussy shaved clean, she’ll still look like a pre-teen little girl.

  22. mywellrehearsedmistake

    wow. “…some studies suggest teens who choose it tend to be leaner”. Could you vague that up for me?… just, wow, mind-blowing.

    I really believe in the supernatural powers of drinking milk now.

    Now, who’s for a white russian?

  23. mr right

    I’d rather see her in one of those nude shots with milk. Especially on her ass – with her build, it’s important to take those pictures now, before it looks like the milk is coming out of an actual cow.

  24. p0nk

    #20 thanks for posting for me… yeh, i couldn’t come up with anything witty either.

  25. Chauncey Gardner

    I would have no qualms about fucking this little piece of chicken, even if she were still underage. That’s just the way it is.

  26. Annie Rexia

    She’s got future fatty written all over her short little stubby body. Reminds me of early seventies Sally Struthers sans the whining little starving fuckers in the background. Girls’s cute now. Won’t age well. Stubby little fucks like her never do, unless she startes tickling her tonsils with the good old index finger.

  27. I want to treat her like the main attraction at a Goat Fucking Contest.

    And yes, this is the real TG assholes.

  28. costamar

    That’s a money shot if I ever saw one. What dirty old man in advertising thought about that? A glass of milk cumming in her hand? Jeez. How subtle.

  29. veggo

    Bet Paris is pissed.

    Paris: “That asshole told me there was only one way to get protein!”

  30. Now that she’s legal, is the back door open for business?

  31. Wonky

    Awesome job ‘fish – love the tree in pants comment.
    You’ve been off for a while, but that is just comedic gold.

  32. jrzmommy

    this girl’s ego has got to be the size of Rosie O’Donnell’s ass by now………

  33. Frick

    Oh my gosh, thats just wrong. Talking about sexual innuendos! Give me a fricken break! Could they be any more obvious?! Did this come out the second she turned 18 or something? Turning something as wholesome as milk into a skanky marketing plug. Lame.

  34. LL

    Yeah, the exploding glass of milk really makes no sense. Her superpower isn’t making things explode, it’s that she’s the indestructible cheerleader. Yes, I feel a little bad that I know that. I do covet her hair and that dress. Nice.

    She’s hot, but how long before she turns into another skank like Britney, et al? Hayden, keep your drawers on and stay away from, well, everyone. Just go straight home every night and stay away from da clubs. Save your money and just go to work and maybe you won’t end up like Britney or Lohan.

  35. sid

    Meh. Really, truly, you’ve never seen as-hot or hotter young chicks than Hayden? She’s the perfect hot-teen star…for the Disney channel. Just straight-up pixie cuteness, no scary sexiness to make you anxious. She’ll try movies and other TV series and then end up in Lifetime movies, as the courageous young unwed mother dying of cancer after her husband left her and carrying on by gritting her teeth in the face of the pain and disapproval from others and anger of her young son and desire to be with the new man she thinks could be a soulmate but can he handle her situation and would he be true to her and would it be fair to her son who’s been through so much already and his needs are more important and

  36. Chocolate milk is closer to my fantasy.

  37. zuzuspetals

    Wow, who knew that Annie Leibovitz was doing so poorly that she would engage in such a pathetic project? Will child porn be next? Or maybe she’ll end up as a photographer for Little Miss Sunshine type beauty pageants.
    I have some pictures of stuff she could take her at home if she’s that desperate for work.

  38. UCrawford

    Her comment in that People article about turning 18 was really funny, though.

    “I don’t think much changes when you’re 18 – maybe the way people treat you. But I think the only things I can do is buy cigarettes, porn and, if I get in trouble with the law, I’m kind of screwed.”

  39. sweet pee

    I bet nothing will change, actually. She couldn’t have been more than 14 or 15 when she gave her first blowjob to a director. She’s already got that hardened look – been there, done that, ok what do I have to do for this one…

  40. Russell Simmons

    She’ll get a fat ass, then try to offset that will giant breast implants. And then Ice-T will marry her.

  41. Sheva

    Damn this girl is taking a beating for doing nothing but looking great holding a glass of milk.

    Can some of you fucking retards please go home and beat off on your daughters in the shower or something?

    It’s a good shot, the dress is nice, but maybe a tad retouched as she looks slimmer in it.

    The exploding milk thing is pretty tacky photoshop work though.

  42. cLOSER

    Excuse me, mama. You have a little bit of sperm on your lip.

  43. Nate

    She was hotter in Remember the Titans.

  44. Italian Stallion

    This has a vaguely JonBenet quality to it, but for some reason that doesn’t make me hard in this case. Maybe it’s knowing she’s 18 or something.

  45. Ooba Gooba

    I am already sick to death of this chick. She’s overexposed.

  46. Sheva's dad

    Light the corners of my mind.
    Misty water colored memories…
    Of the way we were.

  47. my comment

    #41… It’s perverted. Wake the fk up.

  48. blue

    She is short.
    she has a fat ass. and though she has a little pretty face, she’s actually not that special…
    Well, I do think she has a great hair…but that’s it!!

  49. my comment

    Her nose job is showing.

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