Hayden Panettiere, my favorite undying obsession activist, stopped by Larry King Live last night and signed autographs for fans waiting outside. I’m kind of pissed because I’ve sent Hayden numerous unanswered requests for an interview. (Location: My pants.) It looks like I’ll have to take out Larry King to achieve my goal. Child’s play. I’ll simply invite him out for an early bird special at Denny’s then, when he takes a nap, I’ll tie his suspenders to a ceiling fan. It’s almost perfect unless he hits me with the Larry Stare. It leaves you powerless so he can slip off to his office for a glass of Metamucil. That man is pure evil.
Photos: Pacific Coast News, Splash News
































whitz | March 4, 2008 at 4:43 pm
froozt?
imran karim | March 4, 2008 at 4:44 pm
how old is she?
mamadough | March 4, 2008 at 4:44 pm
country kitchen buffet dammit! not denny’s.
Binky | March 4, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Just dress up as a dolphin – and you’re in Fish guy.
mike | March 4, 2008 at 4:47 pm
That first pictures looks like my blow up doll.
HELLO!!! NEWSFLASH!!! HELLO!!! | March 4, 2008 at 4:50 pm
She should have a surgeon move her nipples over to her upper arms, because they’re lots bigger than her tits.
A | March 4, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Thought she had green eyes?
Super cool and trendy to be fake in Hollywood! : )
D. Richards (Chef.) | March 4, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Some guy just asked Hayden to ‘blow’ him in that first picture.
Scooby | March 4, 2008 at 4:55 pm
I don’t know what people find so appealing about her.
Scooby | March 4, 2008 at 4:55 pm
I don’t know what people find so appealing about her.
Lola | March 4, 2008 at 5:00 pm
She wears too much make-up. Too much make-up = high-maintenance + not into video games or beer. NEXT.
Ted from LA | March 4, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I’ll bet everything I own she can beat Fish in arm wrestling.
grobpilot | March 4, 2008 at 5:06 pm
When the hell is she going to get naked? I have very simple needs and that is one of them.
lulu | March 4, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Where did she get her shoes? I want them.
Jackie Blue | March 4, 2008 at 5:08 pm
#9 Scooby
It does not matter if a female is overweight like Kim Kardaskank, or underweight like Paris Herpes. There are men out there ready to beat off to them.
Chauncey Gardner | March 4, 2008 at 5:10 pm
#10,
She’s cute, she’s blonde, and she looks like jailbait, but isn’t. That should be a no brainer.
Tredge | March 4, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Hottie. I’d try to pick her up in a bar. “Hey Hayden, have you ever tripped over a tree branch? How about a root?”
At work | March 4, 2008 at 5:19 pm
She looks pretty flabby for someone that always had her picture taken going to the gym.
mike | March 4, 2008 at 5:20 pm
@10, You must be a homo!!
Ript1&0 | March 4, 2008 at 5:21 pm
Damn it man, it sucks not being able to hang out here all day now. I fucking miss it! You’re funny today Fish, as always…
Sigh. Gotta go now. :(
me | March 4, 2008 at 5:30 pm
Mike. soooo, you have something against homos, but not goat fuckers….. verrrrrrrry interesting. And by verry interesting, I of course mean you’re a fucking goat fucker.
mike | March 4, 2008 at 5:35 pm
@21, No I have nothing against homos. But that is the only explanation to Scooby’s being confused about Hayden being appealing.
And by goat and goat fucking, I never meant the animal, I meant your mother. Your mother fucks like a goat and loves it when I pull her ears back and slam it to her hard.
Randal | March 4, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Well, she is certainly a very pretty girl but who is she? I’ve never heard or seen of her before but she certainly seems like she’s got herself together. A beautiful gold chain leads the eye toward her tight red shirt, which only accents her curves. A black skirt, belt and a pair of shoes finish off her style, which is not over the top as many other celebrities that dress themselves.
A conservative, sexy young lady who is no doubt, on her way to the top… whoever she is.
sindiva | March 4, 2008 at 5:39 pm
the make-up artist went a little crazy with the bronzing/shadowing under her chin. It’s like she’s growing stubble in a cartoon.
she’s a female celebrity. you guys are being WAY too nice.
me | March 4, 2008 at 5:40 pm
sob. my moms dead. so, that’s REALLY gross mike.. shocking!!
commish | March 4, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Randal’s posts are like a slightly risque’ paragraph out of a Nancy Drew novel.
dude | March 4, 2008 at 5:41 pm
I’m a horny, red blooded American male.
But something about this dwarf doesn’t do it for me. Maybe it’s cuz she seems like a bitch.
mike | March 4, 2008 at 5:42 pm
@25 she was moving last night bitch!!
granada | March 4, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Her outfit only works on slender people.
Also, she has a nasty slab of orange foundation under her chin.
Hey Den | March 4, 2008 at 5:42 pm
In that first picture she looks like someone just stuck his dick in her ass without first getting clearance for takeoff.
Jackie Blue | March 4, 2008 at 5:43 pm
#27
Bitches not included in a mans masturbation session; I love it!
Holly | March 4, 2008 at 5:43 pm
woo hoo for helping the dolphins. I wish most hollywooders would take her advice and care for more than thier hair extensions.
Janice J. | March 4, 2008 at 5:46 pm
#18
She gains the majority of her weight on her hips, thighs, buttocks; so maybe she simply focuses on the step master at the gym. She definitely does not work on her upper body. This is a common problem with men and women. Some men focus on the upper body work out and end up having chicken legs.
me | March 4, 2008 at 5:48 pm
28- yeah yeah. mom jokes. You are damn witty. Dumbfuck.
mike | March 4, 2008 at 5:53 pm
@28. booo hooo my mommy is dead. You are a sick fuck. Booo hoo poor me. I have to listen to my daddy bang my new step mom.
Get a pair of balls you worthless pussy!!!
BunnyButt | March 4, 2008 at 5:56 pm
7, that’s so funny! Pretending to notice she has eyes.
Auntie Kryst | March 4, 2008 at 5:56 pm
I don’t give a shit what you flying fucks say. I’m asking her to homecoming! So what if she is a freshman, Douchefuck?
Just kidding I’m out of high school and this midget never went.
FRIST!!! | March 4, 2008 at 5:58 pm
And I don’t give a flying fuck what you shits say!!
The Veggi Whore | March 4, 2008 at 6:01 pm
I as well don’t give a shitting fly what you say fucks!!
that’s fun! Gawd, I’m bored!!
FRIST!!! | March 4, 2008 at 6:05 pm
Me too Veggie, what are we drinking for dinner tonight??
The Laughing God | March 4, 2008 at 6:06 pm
The first pic does look like the person behind her is sticking her fingers where the sun doesn’t shine without warning.
akldyief | March 4, 2008 at 6:07 pm
wow.she is really charming. I have seen her photo on a celebrity and millionaire dating site named ” Searching Millionaire dot com”.. Many men winked at her there.
veg whore | March 4, 2008 at 6:11 pm
FRIST!!!! Lets have……shots!!! Or vodka and oj? simple, yet purrrrrfect!!
fuck, I’m thirsty!
FRIST!!! | March 4, 2008 at 6:12 pm
I make a mean margaritini!!
Auntie Kryst | March 4, 2008 at 6:14 pm
@37 Oh wow, I did screw that up didn’t I? I have to refuckulate the swearometer. Thanks for pointing that out Frist.
office veg | March 4, 2008 at 6:14 pm
I have no idea what that is, but I’ll be it’s full of alcohol!!! I’m in!! Auntie, Jimbo and other drunkards!!! Lets go!!!
Juaqin Ingles | March 4, 2008 at 6:28 pm
She’s got no durability at all. She’s only 18 and is already fighting waggle-arm. Definitely a hit-and-quit proposition here. Plus I have an ex that looked almost exactly like this chick. Maybe that’s the problem. I’ll stick with leggy brunettes now.
mafme | March 4, 2008 at 6:42 pm
Okay, I’m not saying that she’s fat– but nothing draws attention to a little flab on the neck than shadowing done with dark makeup in order to hide it. might as well just highlight it on the photo. I still think she’s cute but I’m just sayin.
FRIST!!! | March 4, 2008 at 6:43 pm
Perfect way to end a shitty day!!
down with milo | March 4, 2008 at 6:53 pm
supposedly she and her 30 something boyfriend are moving in together. you know he’s getting closer to poking her in the pooper every day. i loathe him