Harry Potter Wants To Bang Ryan Gosling Now

February 7th, 2012 // 30 Comments
'Got Any Pubes?'
Daniel Radcliffe
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Apparently Daniel Radcliffe really wants to make sure he’s no longer remembered as the sweet boy-wizard beloved the world over, but instead as a pubic-hair loving alcoholic who thinks his movies are better than Scorsese now because have you heard? Daniel Radcliffe drinks and likes pubes. Recognize. On that note, here he is fantasizing about having butt-sex with Ryan Gosling because if there’s one thing this situation was missing, it’s an obsessive man-crush that ends with Daniel Radcliffe shaving Ryan’s face into his pube-jungle which is how I assume this interview ends. Via Celebuzz:

“This year I have a talent crush on Ryan Gosling. I think he’s fantastic and… (ahem) you know he’d be nice afterwards. He seems smart. If I was gay, I would go for a smart man.”

*quickly shoves Jon Hamm photos into desk* I’m pretty sure if you openly fantasize about snuggling with a nice, intelligent man after passionate love-making, you don’t get to say “I mean, if I was gay.” The Golden Snitch’s pretty much out of the bag at that point, and wow, I did not just make that joke. I’ll go die sexless and alone now.

Photos: Getty, INFdaily, Splash News

superficial

  1. cc

    He spent months with his dick straining fruitlessly in the direction of Emma Watson. He was so frustrated he changed sides.

  2. If this boy had any man credentials they have been revoked, “If I was gay, I would go for a smart man.” Dude don’t beat around the bush just come out of the damn closet.

  3. Terry

    I just threw up in my goddamn mouth!

  4. Frank Burns

    Okay, I don’t want to see any more stories like this one.

  5. I don’t think Ryan Gosling would look good in bangs. He’s kind of feminine looking as it is, but if he decides to do this, the last person he should consult is the kid who played Harry Potter.

    For the record, I couldn’t even type that with a straight face.

  6. dani

    Well, you can’t blame the guy…

  7. Sliver

    If you were gay, Daniel? Ooooookay.

  8. Cock Dr

    As long as there was no butt seks I would watch that video.
    Where’s McFeely? I need the site’s in-house gay wordsmith. Bring him hither.

  9. Juaquin ingles

    “If I Hit It,” by Daniel Radcliffe, in bookstores this Spring!

  10. slappy magoo

    In related news, IF I were hungry, I’d like a sandwich.
    In more related news, of course I’m hungry.

  11. Mike

    “Hey Dan, there’s Ryan Gosling.”
    “EXPECTO! A BONER!”

  12. Deryn

    Fish, Daniel Radcliffe posts do not satisfy the beefcake needs of your beefcake-desiring fans. I am just saying.

  13. SisterRay

    Dunno, I feel like this guy would say he was gay if he was. I mean, how can saying stuff like this constantly but pretending to be straight be advantageous in any way? Closeted gay guys are ones like Joe Jonas and Zac Efron who, as far as I know, never ever talk about homosexuality and continue to date soulless wannabe starlets who nobody can possibly even try to believe they actually have sex with.

  14. vekfan

    What’s going on with his eyebrows?

  15. He gets one more pass for his episode of Extras.

  16. jules

    Okay but really, the Harry Potter series was no Lord of the Rings. These were adequate adaptations of some nice, imaginative books with a sub-average plot-line. And this guy is whining about an Oscar ‘just’ for the hours he put in? Uh, I’m pretty sure the people at Police Academy put a shitload of hours in too, buddy, but do you see them demanding Oscars for their time? If that’s what we’re awarding excellence on these days, then I’d like an Oscar for that two years I worked at a gas station. And they thought I’d be content with minimum wage and all the slurpies I could put away. Nice try assholes.

  17. forrest gump

    DO NOT HESITATE: call his mother, folks!!

  18. It’s “If I WERE gay,” Harry. For hypothetical situations, you’re supposed to say “were” …

  19. Rainbow Justice

    You’re gay now, Nancy boy. Chip chip and wand waving tah fucking dah.

  20. mrsmass

    shit, who wouldn’t want to bang ryan gosling?

  21. courtkney

    It’s not that he loves pubes he just can’t stand the sight of a vagina.

  22. Daniel Radcliffe Leather Jacket Woman in Black
    Pedro
    Commented on this photo:

    Wise Potato Chips are good – they are a local brand on the East coast…in Philly it was one of the bnrdas you would get a small bag of at a convenience store to go w. your hoagie; Wise or, the more popular Herrs.

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