Han Solo and Princess Leia knocked space boots – for real! Apparently, Harrison Ford got a hold of Carrie Fisher’s cinnamon buns and gave her a bit of The Force during the making of the first Star Wars film. Here’s what Carrie revealed on an upcoming British TV special, according to The Sun:
“I went on the film saying ‘I’m going to have an affair’, like it was a kiwi, an exotic fruit — because I’d never had one!” She adds: “I had a crush on Harrison for sure. Harrison is great fun when he’s had a few drinks.”
Shaking her head and saying: “I’m going to get in so much trouble,” she adds: “Once I left the room and came back and he was in the closet not wearing a lot of clothes.”
For all you Star Wars geeks out there, this means that Harrison and Carrie had what grown-ups call “a special hug.” You see, when a man loves a woman, or drinks enough gin, he feels the urge to put his penis into her vagina. Okay, I lost you didn’t I? Um, alright, got it: The man wants to put his “lightsaber” into a woman’s “Sarlacc pit.” But, don’t worry; there’re no tentacles or giant teeth. Well, sometimes. That’s where the gin comes in handy…
Thanks to veggi for the tip. May the Schwartz be with you!
Kelly | April 29, 2008 at 2:02 pm
.
Jenipurrr | April 29, 2008 at 2:02 pm
“got a hold of Carrie Fisher’s cinnamon buns and gave her a bit of The Force”
OMG, I’m dying over here! LOL
For the record, I’d bump uglies with ford too.
FIRST!
NickiChick | April 29, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Wow, superficial writer guy, way to give us an up-to-the-minute, breaking news story =)
My guess is Bill O’Reilly is still confident in his job security.
Little does he know you’re lurking around the corner..
:: insert evil laugh here ::
eh | April 29, 2008 at 2:04 pm
hahahahahahaha
i had to ask my self who is Carry fisher
dude_on_a_wire | April 29, 2008 at 2:04 pm
You just know Chewbacca got a piece of that.
ian | April 29, 2008 at 2:05 pm
lolololol one of your funnier posts. Not too surprised by this.
Donkey Ass | April 29, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Carrie Fisher 1980 = kind of attractive
Carrie Fisher now = my penis commits suicide rather than see her hoo-ha
veggi | April 29, 2008 at 2:11 pm
You’re welcome fish.. and where the HELL is the picture of Harrison??? A little love for the ladies please????
Ohhhhhhhhh Indy!!!!
Sarah | April 29, 2008 at 2:12 pm
What a hooker, she’d never had an affair, like it’s something everyone has to do to fulfil their lives
Ninja ButtKicker | April 29, 2008 at 2:14 pm
10. “Get in there you big furry oaf, I don’t care what you smell!”
9. “Luke, at that speed do you think you’ll be able to pull out in time?”
8. “Put that thing away before you get us all killed.”
7. “You’ve got something jammed in here real good.”
6. “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”
5. “You came in that thing? You’re braver than I thought.”
4. “Sorry about the mess…”
3. “Look at the size of that thing!”
2. “Curse my metal body, I wasn’t fast enough!”
1. “She may not look like much, but she’s got it where it counts, kid.”
Darth invadeher | April 29, 2008 at 2:18 pm
So what? Who cares?
combustion8 | April 29, 2008 at 2:18 pm
sarlac pit, great stuff!!
veggi | April 29, 2008 at 2:19 pm
If she was really eager for adventure, she should have tried ATM with James Earl Jones. Although, if it’s a black guy, how do you know if there’s any “A” on it when you go “TM”? Frist, little help?
mamadough | April 29, 2008 at 2:20 pm
she’s about as attractive as sally fields…
veggi | April 29, 2008 at 2:20 pm
@10- I see your innuendos, and I raise you “lines in Star Wars that are improved by using the word Pants”
The pants may not look like much, kid, but they’ve got it where it counts.
I find your lack of pants disturbing.
These pants contain the ultimate power in the universe. I suggest we use it.
Han will have those pants down. We’ve got to give him more time!
You are unwise to lower your pants.
Don’t worry. Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.
Maybe you’d like it back in your pants, your Highness.
Your pants betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially one . . . Your sister!
PS: She may not be so hot now, but shes frekin funny as hell as an author..
veggi | April 29, 2008 at 2:21 pm
@13- eat shit and live asshole..
Andy | April 29, 2008 at 2:24 pm
She’s extremely bright, extremely funny, extremely creative, with a very colorful overall personality.
So, no, I don’t want to fuck her.
jrz | April 29, 2008 at 2:25 pm
I just wish I could see that stick Calista Flockhart’s face when she hears another woman saying “Harrison is great fun when he’s had a few drinks.” Especially now that she’s stuck with old Harrison and not young hot Harrison.
George Washington | April 29, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Thats odd.
She always seemed as if she needed a good horse fucking.
I guess Solo couldn’t deliver the goods, bummer, always thought he was a candy ass.
I bet Chewy could have roughed it up nicely….
Sandy | April 29, 2008 at 2:36 pm
I’d be shocked if Calista Flockhart has any interest in sex. I’ve always assumed that’s why she married Mr. Saggy Balls.
Jimbo | April 29, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Weird. It seemed implied that R2D2 had some sort of device that would pleasure the Princess, some “Galactic Sybian” or, if she’s as kinky as she seems in real life, a “Death Starfish”.
I watch quite a lot of porn.
FRIST!!! | April 29, 2008 at 2:42 pm
#13 haha, I get it. ATM blah blah blah you are such a loser..
Hey real veggi: I think you have to send the Fish dude a pic of Ford, he only has chick pics.
Eric | April 29, 2008 at 2:46 pm
Harrison said he had been attracted to her ever since she did her infamous sexy photoshoot in Girl’s Life magazine.
pinky_nip | April 29, 2008 at 2:46 pm
So… he had to be drunk to bone her… no surprises there.
FRIST!!! | April 29, 2008 at 2:48 pm
#13 – Besides, she was a princess, why would she degrade herself by fucking that n i g g e r???
Mo | April 29, 2008 at 2:56 pm
@10
Oh, that comment was made of all kinds of win. :D Thank you so much for the laugh.
Spongebob Gangsta | April 29, 2008 at 2:57 pm
You know Yoda had a piece of Leia too…
“Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!!”
FRIST!!! | April 29, 2008 at 3:00 pm
#25 oooohhh….so original..
Get a life. I’m outta here. It’s lunch.
Dr. Otto VanDerWahl | April 29, 2008 at 3:01 pm
I always thought that Han Solo was HAND SOLO if you get what I mean
tight lipped smiler | April 29, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Hans better soak his bullwhip in some Viagara before he starts whipping it around these days. Ooops, wrong movie.
woodhorse | April 29, 2008 at 3:08 pm
Way cool – Jabba no bodda Veggi.
Chupacabra | April 29, 2008 at 3:28 pm
“Once I was about to bone my girlfriend, but Star Wars came on and she said, No way.”
hanshotfirst | April 29, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Wow — all of a sudden, my user name is pretty frickin’ relevant…
eric | April 29, 2008 at 3:44 pm
My respect for Harrison Ford just went up even more.
Ted Mosby | April 29, 2008 at 3:57 pm
I sense a disturbance in the force
Auntie Kryst | April 29, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Veggi, great story!! Funny though, you don’t look Druish.
LL | April 29, 2008 at 6:34 pm
“Gave her a bit of The Force…” That’s some good shit. I’m gonna start using that one.
lulu | April 29, 2008 at 7:55 pm
fo’ sho..what veggi said– where’s a pic of harrison? you know you DO have female viewers. but this doesn’t surprise me…it’s hott! <33
lisabeller | April 29, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Carrie is a member of a millionaire club ” M I L L I O N A I R E L O V E R.C O M ” where the millionaire & celebrity have romance!
shannaners | April 29, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Oh man if they did sleep together she was one lucky girl!
Clover | April 29, 2008 at 10:13 pm
If I was gonna make a movie with Harrison Ford, I too would walk on set thinking I wanted to have a fling. Carrie Fisher had the right frame of mind!
Memo | April 29, 2008 at 10:19 pm
Carrie Fisher rocks! She is one of the funniest actor/ writer out there and I hope she was lucky enough to screw Harrison Ford! I would and still would even if he is an old man, because he’s Han Solo!
ad | April 30, 2008 at 12:36 am
good for her. i don’t care what anyone says, harrison is still fucking sexy. you can’t blame the girl for hitting that!
Stay | April 30, 2008 at 6:42 am
Ugh, Ford, man, I thought you had some taste. Oh wait, no you don’t.
Don’t worry though. We’re still friends.
Inner Circle | April 30, 2008 at 7:02 am
“The man wants to put his “lightsaber” into a woman’s “Sarlacc pit.”"
Factual error: Han Solo doesn’t have a lightsaber. However, in Empire Strikes Back, he doesn’t hesitate to borrow Luke’s to get into… well… “This may not smell good, kid, but it’ll keep you warm.” Well, who else was in that closet with Fisher and Ford? Say, somebody named Hamill?…
By the way, Harrison will be forced to make some sort of comment now. My guess is that he’ll say that the whole thing happened while he was frozen in carbonite and couldn’t defend himself.
Erast Petrovich Fandorin | April 30, 2008 at 7:09 am
No problem. Princess Leia simply senced the force inside and outside.
dnice | April 30, 2008 at 9:00 am
Love the spaceballs reference (you too, Auntie Kryst)
Grunion | April 30, 2008 at 1:19 pm
Star wars and sex just don’t go togehter man, they just don’t.
Some of these posts are proof of that.
prez | May 1, 2008 at 10:38 pm
that was funny
herbiefrog | May 7, 2008 at 12:12 am
eeerrrrrr…
you did actually read the article ?
Shaking her head and saying: “I’m going to get in so much trouble,” she adds: “Once I left the room and came back and he was in the closet not wearing a lot of clothes.”
hmmmm…
so… are we nearly there yet ?