“Your children drove me to this.”
Roughly 300 AD, it was decided that a sequel to the Old Testament would be shekels in the camels because early Mesopotamia was a lot like modern Hollywood right down to the boy love and rampant golden showering of whores. So a group of writers got together and hashed out a new version of God that would arrive on Earth as a baby (Though sadly not in a rocket ship.) and then never age past 30 for maximum handsomeness. He also wouldn’t facilitate angel rape which was completely falling flat with focus groups. They HATED angel rape. Anyway, this “New Testament” went on to become an international bestseller probably because people spent centuries thinking you could fall off the face of the Earth into the mouth of a dragon. But more importantly, it ironically became the impetus for an over-commercialized holiday where 90% of western civilization is guilted into having a materialistic orgasm all over the faces of peoples they can’t fucking stand for more than 15 seconds. And that’s the story of why we’ll be back Tuesday.
Happy Holidays, Everyone!
NOTE: I should probably point out these are completely new photos of Courtney Stodden that we sat on because she literally posed for 100 of these. Which, in my opinion, isn’t near enough photos to accurately portray how much Santa enjoys wafting an “underage” groin directly into his beard. It’s better than coffee, he’ll tell you.
Photos: GSI Media
Herman Cain? You sneaky son of a bitch!
Make a wish…
The only thing more pathetic than this couple… so vehemently hating a god that you claim you don’t think exists. Let go of the hate dude.
Oh go away, Troll.
Merry Christmas to everyone else, those who are NOT a douche! *mwuah!*
right on, Cran!
Kisses to you, Carla! *Mwah*! :D
I kinda have to agree. There’s nothing wrong with Christianity, but he was raised by fanatics, so he’s got some issues with the whole religion, I guess. I only have issues with zealots.
Make a wish…
Wait, isn’t this kiddy porn?
Who knew Santa likes to hit it from the back? Maybe that depends on what mommy looks like.
love the jelly push up under her tit thats starting to come out…wth? its shaped like a football…what a ho
It’s just so…. creepy.
Not gonna lie. It moved.
Muff, Muff, Muff! Nair-y Gristlelips!
THIS IS A STRANGE POSE FOR LICKING, folks.
Merry Christmas, my deprived fellow fucks.
Superfish, you might be interested to know that your domain registrar (Go Daddy) supports SOPA. Join the boycott?
He’s actually wearing a Biohazard suit.
Is it just me or does she look like a blonde Megan Fox?
If she didn’t want Santa to do that she shouldn’t have worn the G-string with mistletoe on the front.
Merry Christmas to one and all…even the ones who don’t celebrate it!
I don’t know, every time I see a new ream of pix from these morons I just can’t help but feel sorry for that girl… so OBVIOUSLY mentally ILL & NO help in sight – I’m not wishing bad on anyone, BUT, possibly a dose of pneumonia might stop the insanity!? :O(
whores d’oeuvres
Ha! +1!
How come in just about all the pics, she is looking right at the camera not paying him an ounce of attention and he’s trying so hard to kiss her or just get her to look at him? yea I know, she’s a dumb slut using him blah blah blah…I still have to ask!
best “I’m so gay” pic of the series
so this dude is gay right? so this Courtney person has gotta be the best tranny ever… and not a day under 30…
“The Courtney Stodden Bikini Humping Santa Pics We Saved For Last.”
Gee, umm, thanks? I guess…
I would fuck her until my cock went numb.
No kidding, you, me, and every other dude on this planet
This. In every hole she’s got until my heart gave out. The ones who say they wouldn’t are full of crap.
Are there any shrinks in the gallery today? I just want to know, is it really, REALLY bad that I’m starting to feel attracted to her? I’m worried that maybe I’ve been infected by the “naughty factor.”
I don’t knoooow. A pervert in a Santa Claus suit with an underage girl and taking pictures… sounds a lot like Christmas in the malls every year…
Ahahhahahaha!!
“underage” ????? old and nasty is more like it
Non of these are the least bit sexy she looks like shes hard to hold up
u.are.the.stupid.
I think she’s cute as hell.
Poor ol’ Santa’s resorted to eating at the Y, damn you economy!!
My santa is ril, this snow is ril…
I used to think she just wore bras 3 sizes too big with super bulky padding, but now I realize those are definitely implants.
horrible.
Why do I get the feeling Santa’s candy cane looked like it had been dragged along the floor after he put it in her Christmas stocking.
“And then that sinful Santa said he wanted to ravish my resplendent rosebud until it turned a radiant red…”
My urine was bright red this morning. I think it means – Christmas is here!
This will not last
Oh yeah, those tits are real. Totally. In the same way that canoeing on my Wii is as real as canoeing on a lake.
Fuck the Happy Holidays bullshit!!!!
Merry Christmas everyone.
To be fair, she does have great legs.
She has a great figure, real or not, but she over tans and has no sense of modesty. I can’t find women like that, ie skanks, attractive. Same goes for men who have great bodies but walk around shirtless all the time like douchebags.
seriously… wtf did this girls parents do to her?
Not gonna lie, it moved a little. That being said, don’t confuse my lack of a gf with a tolerance for loose moral ground. This is still gross.
THIS WHORE HAS NO SHAME AND THAT INCLUDES THE MALE WHORE. America can do better!
A 35 year old “teen”?
Om Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom :P
COURTNEY, IF YOU ARE READING THIS:
ALL PUBLICITY IS -NOT- GOOD PUBLICITY.
even the people who troll this website would prefer if you kept your hyperactive cooch under wraps.
and we wonder why the rest of the world hates us.
“After a long night, Santa relaxed and cracked open a cold one….”
“..and this is the little reindeer who pulled a train for Santa.’
ENOUGH! MAKE IT STOP!