So Half-Sack From ‘Sons Of Anarchy’ Murdered An 81-Year-Old Woman Then Died Falling Off A Roof

September 27th, 2012 // 31 Comments
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Now that all the information seems to be in for this story that first started out with Sons of Anarchy star Johnny Lewis reportedly being killed in a double homicide, it turns out he allegedly murdered his 81-year-old former landlord then died falling off a roof after fighting her neighbors with “superhuman strength” thanks to being high off his ass on PCP and/or meth, according to TMZ. A sequence of events that apparently didn’t surprise the always candid SOA creater Kurt Sutter who just posted the following to Twitter. (WARNING: Contains spoiler from Tuesday night’s episode.. which I hadn’t watched yet.)

not sure if folks know this yet, but johnny lewis (halfsack) died last night. the sad irony of it happening two days after opie’s death is not lost on me. it was a tragic end for an extremely talented guy, who unfortunately had lost his way. i wish i could say that i was shocked by the events last night, but i was not. i am deeply sorry that an innocent life had to be thrown into his destructive path. yes, it’s day or mourning, but it’s also a day of awareness and gratitude. sadly, some of us carry the message by dying.

Of course, the most random part of this story is that this dude used to date Katy Perry in 2006 which makes it pretty clear that being denied access to her giant breasts turns a man to murder. On that note, now would be a good time to fire an arrow into Russell Brand‘s heart before he kills again. (For those of you asking, “Again?” he sent Katy Perry straight into John Mayer‘s penis. Is there some other definition of murder I don’t know about?)

Photos: Getty

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  1. Rico Jones

    Did not care about this guy dying. Just clicked right over to the Katy Perry pool pics.

  2. USDA Prime McBeef

    Let’s step away from the hilariousness of geriatricide for a second to take note of what a homely dog Katy Perry was six years ago.

    She’s no treat now, but damn, that picture… woof, woof.

  3. Crissy

    This dog sure needs to thank the lord for her boobs, EVERY SINGLE DAY!

  4. Put It In

    Sons of Anarchy keeps topping itself. Every season. I think it can’t get any better. It sure as hell does.

    Brilliant show!

  5. Now he’s no sac.

  6. XGL

    This only further proves that KP really, in fact, knows how to pick them. If Russell Brand is ever “the best” guy in your dating record, you know you have really fucked up.

    But her parents raised her in a strict religious household! There’s no way she could end up lost and confused!!

  7. Michelle

    I loved him in SoA. Prospect was amazing. It’s sad to see someone with some talent ending up this way.

  8. All of a sudden I want to see Fiddler on the Roof and a Cat on a Hot Tin roof.

  9. Crabby Old Guy

    I think that, given this sad news, Katy should finally take off all her clothes and show us her tits. No. Really. It’ll help start the healing process. I think I saw something like that on one of those “Afternoon Specials”.

  10. Katy Perry Johnny Lewis Half-Sack Sons of Anarchy
    Commented on this photo:

    Katy’s got such a good track record with men. I’m sincerely staring to think she’s some kind of soul sucking harpy. She drains men of their life force and willpower. When inevitably separated from her tits, the victim loses his shit. That girl she kissed is the only one who still has sanity left.

    She sure doesn’t look like anything special if you don’t focus on her tits. What the hell are those things made of?

  11. rantatonne

    I like how 2 people died and most of the the comments are about Katy Perry, because Boobs. Faith in hilarity, restored.

    Not to break the trend; did anyone else think that was Zooey Deschanel for a second, or has moving to Kenya made me begin thinking all white people look alike?

    • Sliver

      So apparently in Kenya black people are something different than black hair, black skin, dark eyes? Because all white people do NOT look the same. Fail. (shrug)

  12. Kay

    How ironic is it that this guy played a killer in Criminal Minds…

  13. A true Son of Anarchy.

  14. Without make up, Katy Perry looks like your second grade teacher that you think is really pretty, and then you see a class picture 20 yrs later and go, what was I thinking?

  15. Beer Baron

    Your Winner! And still undefeated!!! PAVEMENT!!!!

  16. nowon_yuno

    He left SOA because he was a Scientologist and he some issues with that and the show.

  17. Rico

    Travis McCoy . . John Mayer . . Russell Brand . . John Lewis . . Robert Ackroyd. Katy needs to stay away from musicians and actors. Maybe she should go out witha plumber or something. But my guess is her next guy will be a player like Wilmer Valderama.

  18. Sliver

    The other day before I knew about this guy’s death (love SoA btw)
    I was reading what 2 commenters wrote about who they had in their death pool. One said Lindsay Lohan. I thought to myself, you guys do not know how to play celebrity death pool, apparently. 7 times out of 10 the one who dies is not even a B-list actor. Usually it is someone who has not seen too much fame. Pay attention, as this truth bears out.

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