Gwyneth Paltrow Wore This

December 15th, 2010 // 88 Comments

Here’s Gwyneth Paltrow at the Hollywood premiere of Country Strong last night where she was a confusing jumble of Botox and leggyness. I honestly can’t tell if I want to have sex with her, or use her forehead to reflect the sun at a pile of ants. Then again, I’m sure if I promised to lay some doilies down, she’d be open to both because she’s fancy.

*pounds metal fist into armrest* I’ll get you next time, Paltrow. Next time…

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. Salad Face

    They all start to look like extras from the “Black Hole Sun” video after a while, right?

  2. dufresne

    I like her, that Pepper Potts.

  3. Any Guy

    even though she’s a stuck-up broad, I’d BANG THE SHIT outta her. yummers. its just when she opens her mouth – ouch.

  4. JfromHtown

    First Biznatches!!

  5. Oh snap

    hot…

  6. NeNe

    I personally do not think that she has the body to pull of this outfit.

  7. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    g!
    Commented on this photo:

    NICE!

  8. J.P.

    I don’t know if the kids today will get the Dr. Claw reference.

  9. GravyLeg

    Take the “O” out of Country and you have the name of her movie spelled correctly.

  10. GravyLeg

    I never thought I would say these words negatively but that dress totally makes me think of her naked….

    • Mr. Natural

      ‘negatively’ – right on…I’m picturing inverted, razor-bumpy vag, fried-egg tits, and pointy ribs.

  11. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    FIRST

  12. It’s been a while since I could honestly say Ms Paltrow looks hot. In her most recent photos it often appears that her lips have disappeared & her shiney forehead has swelled up like a balloon.
    But this looks pretty good.
    More dresses like this on tall skinny blondes please (this is not a coded request for Paris Hilton pics).

  13. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Commented on this photo:

    I wan to lick her feet. Is that wrong?

  14. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she really looked at a recent picture of Meg Ryan and said “She looks beautifull.”

  15. scarlett leaf

    i kinda like it…it’s white & trashy, which is appropriate since she’s promoting “country strong.” well played, paltrow.

  16. Bronto

    I’d smooch her a ton and hold the fuck out of her hand!

  17. DOucHe BaGELs

    I think Oprah can pull off the same outfit.

  18. McFeely Smackup

    she looks like a blond eel caught in a net….who is wearing the ugliest ring ever.

  19. Franksinatrastein

    Isn’t this the same woman who complained about “Hollywood” requiring women to screw their way to the top? Seriously – is this “Ms. Morality?”

    Don’t get me wrong – if she wants to walk around wearing nothing but a hat, I’m fine with that. I just think the hypocrisy is hilarious.

    • meh

      She’s a setup, well-born nobody who feels entitled and named her son “Jesus” or something like that (heh heh). Yeah, it’s ok for this marginal talent (yeah I know the industry gave her awards and stars and million of dollars and accolades and pussy rings,etc.) to skank out though.
      Just not the rest of lower humanity.

  20. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    freaky
    Commented on this photo:

    These four words have NEVER come to mind when looking at a photo of Gwyn before, but I WOULD HIT IT.

    Ech, now I feel dirty.

  21. Spocktopus

    Is this a dress she picked up from Anne Nicole’s Smith estate sale?

    It’s so trashy and nineties and just screams “Lukat ma baady!”

  22. Jonesy

    Watch for a new Chris Martin song titled “You only look hot when I’m not around”.

  23. Pangulin

    Who’s the long haired blonde guy in a laced up sail?

  24. Richard McBeef

    needs more ass, more titties, and less gunt. You might be able to keep the gunt if you make the titties big enough to draw away from it.

    • Sugar

      Agreed.

    • Shawn Kline

      Is it at all possible for you to make a post without sounding like a total fucking dickhead? Seriously…. hot chicks posted on here on a regular basis and you think you sound cool or witty by dogging each and every one? Seriously, give it the fuck up…its not her fault you were locked in your parents basement w a jar of Crisco and a dirty sock until you hit 40(and then couldnt bring yourself to leave).

      Seriously, shut the fuck up. Its one thing dogging on Snooki or one of those fucking garden gnomes who warrant the insults, but you just sound like a bitter, whiney bitch when you do so post after post(not to mention, shes FAR hotter than anyone who would dare get within a country mile of your white trash ass). Seek therapy.

      • GravyLeg

        Actually, Shawn, she is a self-important stuck up cunt whose moderately acceptable looks and sub par body MIGHT warrant a matinée movie and a Grand Slam at Denny’s were it not for the fact that she fell out of Blythe Danners equally self-important vag…

        Take the internet serious much? Double your dose of lithium.

      • Richard McBeef

        You are right SK. I need to be more cool and witty. Lets start with some masturbating in your parents basement jokes, those are fresh and original.

        Where do you get this material? It is solid gold.

        You’re defending celebs that you don’t even fucking know from attacks by random anon internet people on a goddamn gossip website that exists entirely to make fun of celebs. But I need to seek therapy? This is my therapy fuckstick, criticising GP’s ass and tits is what keeps me from beating the living shit out of whiny cocksmokes like you.

  25. vandal

    Why the fuck is she famous? Name me one thing worth watching she’s been in.

  26. Mortimer Duke

    You all know what this means right? She aint got no draws on. So not only is Country Strong the name of the movie, its also describing the smell emitting from her cooter.

  27. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    goob
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s wearing a helluva lot of foundation/makeup. those closeups make me wonder how many layers til the skin is found

  28. stevebeagle

    I’d try like hell to knock the bottom out of it

  29. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Mortimer Duke
    Commented on this photo:

    You know its a classy event when someone wearing Payless ballet flats and a JC Penney purse are on the same red carpet as a supposed star.

  30. anonymous

    she doesn’t look too bad in that dress. still doesn’t take away the fact that she has “self-righteous bitch” running through her veins.

  31. BENWAW

    DAMN SHE IS HOT

  32. I’ll hate myself in the morning after i jerk off to her.

  33. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    ...
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks pregnant.

  34. hmna

    GO GO GADGET VAG!

  35. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Anita Bonghit
    Commented on this photo:

    The 80s called. They want their wedding dress back.

  36. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    thepinktaco
    Commented on this photo:

    good thing you can’t see me right now, I’m humping my computer.

  37. thepinktaco

    good thing you can’t see me right now, I’m humping my computer.

  38. xanax in my beer

    It looks like one of those cheap dresses you rent in adult entertainment stores for your whore halloween costume.

  39. Sugar

    Only single women dress like this. PLEASE let that marriage be over!

  40. The Listener

    Wow! I guess she doesn’t mind for everyone to know she’s not wearing any panties under her dress. I still think it’s kinda nasty to go out in public without any underwear on, especially in clothes that make it really obvious.

  41. crazypants

    She certainly does everything in her power to come off like the craziest, high-maintenance uber-snob and general pain in the ass – but she’s a very attractive woman.

    I remember her being quite sexy in that stewardess movie she’s in – she’s trashy and fun and spends a lot of time in super short Daisy Dukes and she looked damn good.

  42. We’re not sure about the face, but me and Little Mancuso are proudly standing to salute that dress.

  43. We’re not sure about the face, but me and Little Mancuso are proudly standing to salute that dress.

  44. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Chris
    Commented on this photo:

    No underwear, hot lights, crowded theater, awful movie and a white dress – aren’t you just asking for sweaty crotch stain?

  45. jojo

    “Please see me as beautiful , i need this, i really, really do”.

  46. Joe Blow

    Ever since she dumped Madonna as her BFF, she has seemed happier and hotter.

    She’s still a pretentious PITA tho.

  47. nonminti

    hm… maybe I’m wrong but I have she wears no panties with this dress. How odd when it’s Gwyneth Paltrow! and her face looks new. She’s changing…

  48. timmy the dying boy

    I’d like to see that outfit on someone like Scarlett rather than this psychotic stick insect.

  49. When the straps pop out she’s ready to eat.

    I’ve learned so much from her mongoloid martha stewart posing.

  50. Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong
    Poptart
    Commented on this photo:

    Iggy Pop’s ass looks saggy in that dress.

    • Laura

      YOUR ASS LOOKS SAGGY IN THAT DRESS! YOURS AND YOUR GIRLFRIENDS, AND YOUR MOTHERS, AND YOUR GRANDMOTHER, AND YOUR LITTLE GIRLFRIENDS, AND YOUR AUNTIES, AND YOUR MOMMA’S FRIENDS ASS TOO! :)

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