(l to r) 1. Private Witherspoon, a 20-year-veteran who survived several online jokes about her chin, but in body only. Her family says she’s never been the same person since and often suffers from night terrors and alcohol abuse. 2. A pretentious cunt.
In my haste to slap together a link post this morning, I completely missed the paragraph in Lainey Gossip’s Gwyneth Paltrow post (which I recommend clicking) where GOOP literally, yet not surprisingly, compares reading Internet comments with going to war. A comment which she, of course, made on Memorial Day of all days because that’s a pauper’s holiday with its canned beer and non-hand-rolled frankfurters consumed in backyards befit for swine. So here’s that quote for everyone to fully enjoy for its delicate fart-sniffing notes and unbridled savoir-faire. Via re/code:
“You come across [online comments] about yourself and about your friends, and it’s a very dehumanizing thing. It’s almost like how, in war, you go through this bloody, dehumanizing thing, and then something is defined out of it,” she said. “My hope is, as we get out of it, we’ll reach the next level of conscience.”
Later, Gwyneth would clarify her remarks: “What I meant to say is that when you see some anonymous ‘troll,’ I believe is the nomenclature, insult your lifestyle and maybe not fully understand that the only way a person can truly, honestly express themselves is through very, very high end Capri pants, it’s like watching your child get gunned down by a crazy person. And as a parent, I can relate to that possibly more than anybody else alive at this exact moment. No one is experiencing anything close to that pain right now except me. But you know I persevere because, dammit, these pants are me. They’re me.”