Gwyneth Paltrow Basically Admits She And/Or Chris Martin Cheat Like Crazy

September 7th, 2011 // 82 Comments

While promoting her new movie Contagion at the Venice Film Festival, Gwyneth Paltrow apparently took time off from demanding the canals be filled with Perrier – organic Perrier – and apropos to who the hell knows, decided to announce she “respects and admires” her friends that have cheated on their spouses because apparently she’s not constrained by Victorian sensibilities on marriage. I have no clue. The Daily Mail reports:

Miss Paltrow said: ‘I am a great romantic – but I also think you can be a romantic and a realist.
‘Life is complicated and long and I know people that I respect and admire and look up to who have had extra-marital affairs.
‘It’s like we’re flawed – we’re human beings and sometimes you make choices that other people are going to judge.
‘That’s their problem but I think that the more I live my life, the more I learn not to judge people for what they do.
‘I think we’re all trying our best but life is complicated.’

Read: “Chris Martin has sex with other women right in front of me without even using a coaster, but I don’t judge him because I live my life with a quiet sensibility filled with relatable advice for moms and palpable disdain for anyone whose house isn’t adorned with hand-painted wallpaper.” And speaking of that last part…

Remember when Gwyneth “saved” a woman on 9/11 by almost running her over and had no idea about it? Well, now she remembers the whole thing and it was such a touching and personal moment that – wait for it – she feels sorry for anyone who had the same encounter but with a non-famous person. You seriously can’t make this shit up. Via Reuters:

“It was an extraordinary story and all I could think about is all of the people who had experiences like that that day, but aren’t able to reach out because it wasn’t a recognizable person,” said the 38-year-old Oscar winner.

“If only it was me who caused every single freak encounter that prevented someone from entering the towers that day, but now there tales are sullied with poor people so they might as well have died. It’s tragic really.”

Photo: Splash News

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  1. Antonio Scuzziones

    Why would any man out up with her? She has thin hair , thin lips , no breasts

    • Does she have a vagina?

    • also no eyebrows and yucky makeup, looks all funeral parlorish

    • Cosmic Kat

      Madonna is always looking for souls to trade with the devil.
      Maybe Goopy here has already exchanged her sold for a humorless existence that entails watching her husband bang chicks right in front of her , with the reward of only aging 2 weeks a year . She will also be forced to get more pretentious each year , until she is despised as a human being and must further pretend to know all of the rap song’s lyrics when they do not apply to white people . Tick , tick , tick ….

      • Concerned Adult

        I’ve actually met her ! She’s a name dropper , a vacation/ travel exhibitionist, Needs to show off her furnishings in a pathetic , mind -numbing way. She’s vacuous and trivial , superficial and self – impressed . Or have I just described 65% of Hollywood actresses here ?

    • Carrie Shelly

      She’s just like 95% of the Junior League , trust – fund babies .

      • Banastre Trent - Wordsworth

        I’ve met her too , socially, and my insight is that she is so insecure , her compensation is to be pretentious . She tries very hard to have people like her , or adore her. She tries very hard to make you aware of her accomplishments . Her insecurity is the 800 pound gorilla in her home

  2. Poison Ivy League

    YUCK. Poor people are soooooooo gross!

  3. Gwyneth Paltrow
    The Most Interesting
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Venice turn into Middle-Earth? The dwarf, the elf, and the Fairy Bitch?

  4. I have to admit, even though she comes off like a cad a whole lot, I still find her quite appealing.

  5. TomFrank

    I’m trying to wrap my head around the fact that, just one paragraph after pointing out that she’s been married for the last seven years, The Daily Mail refers to her as “Miss Paltrow.”

  6. Venom

    Of course she is cheating on him, no one has seen her with that douche for years now.

    She is a jackass, but she is still pretty hot and has a nice little body.
    Based on the amount of time she spends with Beyonce and Jay Z, I assume that she has threesomes with them on a frequent basis…which is fine.

    • monkeyassface

      gwenyth has been cheating on him for years now, they say chris has some severe depression because of it, because they have 2 children together. Apparently Madonna was a big negative influence as well, and after spending time with madonna who told her fidelity was over rated she was with matthew morrison or whatever the fuck from glee. Shes saying all that shit to ease the path of her cheating scandals to come out soon.

  7. “…the more I live my life, the more I learn not to judge people for what they do.”

    Then what precisely the fuck is there left to judge them on?

  8. Deacon Jones

    Sounds like someone banged ” Matt DAAAmon!”

  9. I hate the “humans are flawed” excuse when it comes to cheating. Yeah, we’re flawed, but we also have self control and willpower to not hurt other people. I dunno, the more I hear about people cheating, the less I want to get married, it just seems like there aren’t any nice people left.

    • Deacon Jones

      I’m getting married on Saturday.

      Sounds like I’m fucked!

    • Dan

      ehhh… unfortunately marriage doesn’t mean much anymore. Just don’t have a kid with them until you are sure they won’t cheat. Try being married for three or fours years first.

      It is really hard to discern how someone will act after they have been in the close personal relationship for awhile. I think it is something you sorta have to roll the dice on.

    • Deacon Jones

      Yeah, we’ve been living together for almost 5 years now, so we both have a good handle on each other, unlike my buddy that married a controlling bitch and THEN moved in with her. Now he has 3 kids and gets yelled at for watching football on Sundays.

    • monkeyassface

      its a really fucking stupid excuse, people dont want to be accountable for their actions so they say stupid shit like, were all flawed. Most people do not cheat on one another, but marriage is a serious thing, people are duped into believing its something like a cheesy hollywood romance film, no in the real world you have to work your ass off, you dont have a beautiful wedding and say ok now im happy. You hve to work on your marriage and learn to be patient and kind and continue working hard to keep the love strong.

      And dont base anything in life on the outcomes of people in hollywood. They are the harlots, the sluts, the whores, the fucking freaks, the satan worshipping, the most immoral, the drug abusers, the alcoholics, the lying, cheating most disgusting people on the face of the planet. They want you to think that marriage is a waste of time and overrated.

  10. Savalas

    >”Gwyneth Paltrow Basically Admits Chris Martin Cheats On Her”

    On behalf of all of us, thank you, Chris Martin.

  11. Doc Schweinstrudel

    Miss Buzz Killington! I’m bored.

  12. Doc Schweinstrudel

    Sleeping with her is probably like sleeping with a bicycle

    • God is Black

      I like riding my bicycle really hard to the point of replacing it with another(metaphor?).Oh “Why would any man out up with her? She has thin hair , thin lips , no breasts” I have slept with many females with the same description of the geeky kind and they ROCK! Yes finally if I was Chris Martin, I would cheat if said wife with hold sex, bj or even handjob! God Damn it, he is a rock star so get some Pussy, even if most of the superficial crowd think they a gay band!

    • Richard McBeef

      those bikes with the big girl seat are actually comfortable to ride

      • Doc Schweinstrudel

        Well hah I didn’t say riding a bike. I said laying in bed with it and sleep with it in your bed.
        I’m sorry to hear that some woman withholds sex from someone. My bf does it too with me sometimes. So manipulative, right?

  13. Twizlah

    If catching wood whilst watching Gwyneth’s fake, seizure-laden death in the trailer for “Contagion” is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.

  14. Just how clumsy is this woman that it requires several people to get her onto a boat?

  15. NTT

    Chris’ gotta keep his dick warm somehow.

  16. Crabby Old Guy

    You know, the only reason I’d consider seeing “Contagion” would the pure enjoyment of watching her die that (apparent) horrible death shown in the ads.

    I know it’s only her playing a character – but it’s a start.

  17. Gwyneth Paltrow
    Commented on this photo:

    Old lady face.

  18. kimmykimkim

    Maybe I’ll be Gwyneth Paltrow for Halloween. She’s pretty fucking scary.

  19. Oh Gwyneth, will you ever keep your whore mouth closed whilst I masturbate to the last shreds of your attractiveness?

  20. Gwyneth Paltrow
    Mac
    Commented on this photo:

    “These earrings are worth more than your house!”

  21. ghost

    Remember that movie where she ended up being a head in a box and she finally stopped talking? Wasn’t that nice?

    • Remember how Brad Pitt’s reaction was so badly overacted? “Awww, nooo!! What’s in the boxxxxx?” You could tell he just couldn’t summon up any real despair about the idea so he just chewed on the scenery instead.

      Good times, man, good times.

  22. Lets get clinical/ly rough

    Message to Gweeny: I want to see your blonde cooch respectively, of course.

    I expect to see this in a James Ivory movie, which is fine.

  23. Jim

    Silly notions like fidelity, monogamy and loyalty are but trifling proletariat concepts; utterly beneath Gwynnie’s uber-sophisticated worldview. She makes love to her numerous paramours on a bed constructed only of first editions of Lady Chatterly and held together by the reduced essence of Cristal and embryonic swan urine.

  24. Tiggles

    So maybe the whole Goop thing is a coping mechanism, wherein she tries to convince herself that she is the ideal woman and mother, to soothe herself from being a cuckold?

  25. edamame

    What is wrong with her “side boob” region?

  26. Captain Obvious.

    God. You people are just stuffed with hate and rage at your own inferiority complexes! Please go to an island and torture each other and let others live!

    • Shaddup, Gwyneth.

      • Timmy Two Pants

        “You people are just stuffed with hate and rage at your own inferiority complexes!”
        Now, are we stuffed with hate and rage and that causes an inferiority complex, or is the hate and rage a result of our inferiority complexes? Because hate and rage directed AT our inferiority complexes makes little to no fucking sense. Sometimes, junior Freud, people just suck and need to be called out on their bullshit.

    • Say, what if we’re stuffed with hate and rage not because we have an actual inferiority complexes, but because Captain Obvious thinks we truly ARE inferior? Of course, that means Captain Obvious would have to have a colossal superiority complex, what with feeling the need to come here and admonish everyone, which means he probably really has an inferiority complex far greater than anyone on this board because he feels compelled to do this, desperate in his need to prove how much better he is than anyone else.

      Now, someone find him a nice island, my work is done here.

  27. Alicia

    She’s so pretentious. Someone needs to knock her off her pedestal so she realizes she’s just as unimportant as everyone else.

  28. nola

    I love how much u hate Gwyneth; it cracks me up in the same way Michael Scott hates Toby on The Office! I can get enough.

  29. Old Fart

    Is there anyone as dumb as she is (not including Obama)?

  30. Jface

    Dear America,

    We-all of your favorite celebs- are banging each other. All of us. All the time.
    So get off your family values high horse and buy tickets to our movies (mostly that last part)!!!!!!!!

    LOVE XOXOXOXOXO,

    Goop, Big Willie Style, J-Lo, and all of your friends here in Hollywood, California

  31. Arzach

    The more I hate her , the more I want to bang her good, hate sex is hot and leaves no regrets

  32. melissa

    She’s entitled to her opinion just like everybody else, people!

  33. Gwyneth Paltrow
    JosieBelle
    Commented on this photo:

    SECURITY! A peasant is heading my way with HYDRANGEAS!

  34. A

    She has that upper class liberal prep school writing style where she says a whole lot of big words in a fancy way, but doesn’t really say anything meaningful. I’ve tried this style out for some of my classes, it definitely works to get an A. But I still feel guilty b/c I KNOW I didn’t say shit, I just used a bunch of fancy words to pretend like I am about to say something great w/o ever actually getting to that part.

  35. Amanda

    did it ever cross your mind that they might plan NOT to be seen together they havent been seen together because they plan it because they dont want to be photographed together

  36. Mom

    You people are awful to gwennie,and I love you for it.She’s such a parody of a wifie and mother.After all , it’s all about her.LOL

  37. Derp.

    It’s pretty hilarious how everyone just tends to believe whatever the hell they hear, so long as it sounds convincing. I had no idea how easy it was to be so ignorant.
    If someone tells you that a celebrity is cheating, most of your excuses tend to be…. “Well, why wouldn’t we believe it?” why? Oh, right, because they’re celebrities, and all celebrities cheat. Right?

    It’s called.. Pay attention, now…. Creating drama and crap for more views and attention. Freaking idiots. Believing everything you hear and life is really gonna suck for you.

    These words didnt come staight out of her mouth on audio or video, did it? Nope. But they SAID she said it, so… Its her??
    Goodness, you people really aren’t too bright, are you?

  38. coldplayfan

    poor chris martin.

  39. coldplayfan

    poor gwyneth.

  40. coldplayfan

    poor moses and apple. these family had to deal with this shit.

  41. Wait until Goopy finds out about Chris’ new baby girl – color coordinated shit will hit the fan.

  42. David

    Gwyneth’s such an irrelevant cunt…

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