‘Gun Violence Sympathy Cards’ Is Funny Because It’s True, Horribly, Depressingly True

June 16th, 2014 // 38 Comments
Gun Violence Sympathy Cards
WATCH: 'Gun Violence Sympathy Cards' - POCKETWATCH

I see this going over well. *grabs popcorn*

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  1. Veronika Larsson

    I’m going to avoid the usual BUT IT’S MY RIGHT TO ARM BEARS that goes back and forth and convinces no one but…
    “The rate of gun ownership in the US is much higher than most comparable countries, with approximately 42.8% of American household owning firearms, including 17.6% owning handguns in 2005. The developed country with the next highest ownership rate was Finland, where 37.9% of the population owning firearms, though only 6.3% owned handguns. Switzerland was the country with the second highest handgun ownership, at 10.3%, with an overall rate of 28.6% for all firearms. In Canada, 15.5% of households own firearms, with 2.9% owning handguns.

    Where there are more guns, more deaths usually follow. The death rate by firearms in the United States was 10.2 per 100,000 people in 2009, for a total of 31,347 deaths. This is nearly as many as in car accidents, where 34,485 Americans died that same year. The American rate of death by firearms is nearly twice as high as the nearest other developed country, again Finland, with a rate of 4.47 in 2008. In Canada, the rate was 2.5 in 2009, while the UK had only 0.25 in 2011.”

    Nothing more to say on this subject. The gun-barrel-stroking fanatics only read the part of the Second Amendment they like and refuse to consider facts and statistics, so why bother arguing?


    • I’ll be honest. I don’t care.

    • Does your post have anything to do with vaginas? Then I don’t give a shit.

    • JBJJ

      Your post just gave me cancer, thanks. Think of it this way, once you take away this right, the Government will be working on the next one to take away. Before you know it, you’ll be paying to visit each site you want to visit once they pull the net neutrality away after 2nd amendments. Once you give up one, you show you’re weak, never be viewed as weak, learn from the Animal Kingdom.

    • If you don’t like how it is, get the 2nd Amendment repealed in it’s entirety. It’s as simple as that.

  2. I hear there’s a missile themed one.

  3. Bryan

    Can I just implore Superficial readers to not give Fish what he wants and ignore the steaming idiocy of this video and his post? He obviously gets off on sitting back in his chair, stroking his chin, and chuckling to himself at the dumb racist swine gun owners and their silly murder toys. The smuggest of puppetmasters.

    He will never, ever change his mind.

    Please, just let this one go.

  4. Swearin

    Um, you people do realize he’s poking fun at the anti-gun asshats who thought making light of tragedy would be a good idea for a cheesy comedy sketch, right? This isn’t attacking gun owners, it’s lambasting the fuckup junior comedy writers of tommorow at UCB who apparently have no self-awareness.

    But you go ahead and jump to your conclusions. Pass the popcorn, Fish.

  5. Cindi

    If we’re going to get rid of parts of the Bill of Rights let’s start looking at the 8th Amendment; we all know OJ was guilty, lets get a second bite at him. Maybe a California jury will get it right this time.

    • Why not doing it in chronological order?
      Especially since the federal government has already disregard a number of times the use of cruel and unusual punishments…

    • Dox

      Here’s what I don’t get.
      There are a vast majority of people that are not against gun ownership, but are rather for measures to try and keep lethal weapons on some sort of restrictions, to avoid them… potentially being used to wholesale slaughter men, women, and children…. as has been so wonderfully highlighted in our news media.

      Apparently somehow, that’s a violation of civil liberties.
      But everybody was ok with the Patriot Act.

      So, making it more difficult for people to commit mass murder is not ok. But revoking peoples legal rights is just fine.

      The logic involved in that, is dizzying.

  6. Swearin

    On second thought, he porbably is just as equally amused at the gun conservative reaction to this crappy sketch.

  7. All I can say is we didn’t have this problem back when I was a kid and all the teachers had guns to protect themselves from the students who had guns to protect themselves from other students. You’d have to be an idiot to think you could go into a public school in the 80′s and think you’d have free reign to shoot up the place.

    Then Jocelyn Elders started yammering about safer bullets and they took away our Black Talons, and now the schools are an open invitation for the crazies.

    Damn you Obama!

  8. Ahh, remember the good ole days, when people with issues just beat the crap out of each other in the school parking lot or behind the gym? But seriously, it’s seriously effed up that I even have to think about gun violence when I drop my kids off at school in the mornings. :-/

  9. John

    He can post all he wants. Meanwhile, I have legally acquired eight firearms since Sandy Hook (because that’s when the big gun control push began). And I’ll keep on collecting.

    What’s odd is that the vast majority of firearm deaths are caused by handguns. But what do people want banned? Assault rifles. Weird.

    And while there have been 36 gun related deaths (NOT 74) on school grounds since Dec 2011, there have been over 2,500 alcohol related deaths on college campuses since Dec 2011. That’s not including high school stats. Where are the calls to ban alcohol?

    I don’t drink, and I have no use for alcohol. By gun control logic, I should push for banning alcohol.

    • Pointing out that alcohol leads to bad decisions isn’t an excuse to justify bad decisions related to guns.

      • John

        Correct, it simply shows the hypocrisy of those who say they want guns banned based on the number of lives lost. If they were really concerned about the number of people killed, alcohol kills exponentially more people. And it too kills innocent people who were not even consuming alcohol themselves. In epidemiological terms alcohol deaths are a pandemic; gun related deaths are a minor outbreak. So, when people (and the media) really get serious about saving lives, they will push for a ban on all alcohol.

      • I HAVE NOT HEARD ANYONE say they want guns banned. Simply register and license them just as is done with automobiles. FUCK! You people really piss me off.

      • John

        When I purchased my firearms, I went to the sheriff’s dept and acquired a permit (through a background check) which is now on file as a registration. That’s the law. So what needs to be changed?

    • cc

      ‘What’s odd is that the vast majority of firearm deaths are caused by handguns. But what do people want banned? Assault rifles. Weird.’

      Kind of makes you think maybe the solution to gun violence is to ban guns below a certain size. Let everyone have all the guns they want, so long as the barrel size is not less than 20 inches.

      After all, that lets hunters and targetshooters keep their rifles and shotguns. And if you are worried about home defense a short 12 or 20 gauge shotgun is probably a better choice than a revolver.

  10. LMAO

    I love all these Brady sympathizers in the comments… Move to NY or Illinois if you have such a huge problem with honest law abiding people being able to defend themselves.

  11. James

    Guns banned in Chicago – highest murder rate and gun crime rate in first world.

    States that freely allowed guns have lowest violent crime rates, lowest murder rates, and lowest gun crime rates.

    Facts are fun government shill.

  12. Karma

    Take all the gun owners, and all those who are against it.
    Put them in a big room. Line up exactly 1/2 as many guns
    as people, and stack them in the middle of the room.
    Play any song for 30 seconds while everybody circles
    and when it stops, everybody goes for it. Your welcome.

  13. Really...?

    I think both sides are missing the key point. That this video is badly made, poorly scripted and does nothing to either make me laugh or advance the argument for either party. Its a shameless attempt to generate a controversy to generate publicity for the makers.

  14. John

    Point 2. Yes, some people want guns banned. Feinstein said she would prefer to ban all firearms.

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