Goldie Hawn’s nipple not as horrifying as you might think

May 4th, 2009 // 141 Comments

Here’s Goldie Hawn attending a party at the Gramercy Park Hotel and, holy crap, that’s some old lady nip. Anyone else surprisingly not offended by this? Me either. Also, I’m now 100% certain Kate Hudson is not her daughter. I’m sorry, ha ha, nice little gag there, Goldie, but it’s honesty time: You stole her from an orphanage. Not that I’m judging your or anything, I just want some truth, dammit! — Or more nip. Whichever works.

NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions that might be a catalyst to evaluate just how much you like your boss. Didn’t he eat your lunch once? Just sayin’.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. You are a fucking retard. Your post blow my balls , and your content is fucking terrible. Give up buddy.

  2. long time reader

    this site is officially dead. desperate attempts at drawing readers in and not knowing what nipples are. just very sad, but we all get to laugh at the writer i guess…

  3. Tart

    Even without the star, Goldie Hawn is sans nipple.

  4. Tart

    I don’t understand – is her nipple up by her armpit? That’s the only thing I see that remotely resembles a nipple and it’s more like a zit.

  5. nn

    optical illusion, no nipple:

    http://i39.tinypic.com/2a95ftj.jpg

  6. Me

    That guy in the second photo trying to grab it.

  7. Don’t think that Kurt Russel will be all that amused!

  8. Darth

    Hoboola!

  9. Super King

    For the love of Zorg , I don`t see any nipples there. fucked up news.

  10. Realist

    She looks good for 60 whatever. But she looks like Geriatric Barbie. Time to grow up.

  11. If that’s a nipple, then this is in fact my cock, NOT a flesh colored tie…

  12. justifiable

    #61 Jesus, did you really tie your cock into a windsor knot? You are indeed my god. And also very possibly insane,

  13. kitty says

    Take it from the owner of two boobs, that is not a nipple!

    #63 lulz

  14. dirk

    granny got a little b-cup boob job.

  15. Kurt Russell receive the decoration for bravery yet? id like to attend!

  16. Fish, have you actually ever seen a nipple? They are not that high up on the boob numbnut.

  17. justifiable

    #68 Really, talk about compound embarassment. To get all worked up over a 60 year old “nipple” – and clearly not know what you’re talking about. I’d say that deserves a star, but, uh…oh, well, maybe not.

  18. stoney

    Yo Goldie is flat chested, too, she had implants like 35 years ago. That’s why Kate has no titties! Duh. But maybe she’s comfortable with her body, unlike SOME people!

  19. anyway

    #70 comfortable or not, I bet she knows where her fucking nipples are located, unlike SOME people.

  20. #63 – What sucks most is accidentally having it fall in hot soup… or knocking the waitress the fuck out when she bends over, blouses buttons hanging on for dear life, and asks if everything’s ok…

  21. justifiable

    #72 No kidding? I would have thought the constant pain from poking yourself in the eye when some hot babe goes by would be your biggest problem. Well, that, and derailing the occasional subway train.

  22. Michelle

    If that is a nipple she has deformed breasts.

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  24. justifiable

    #75 Can you tie a tie? Go see #72, you’ll be dating for the rest of your life.

  25. dontlooknow

    She still looks good for being a thousand years old. She dresses appropriately at least (not like that relic Madonna). I’d like to see a throwdown between Goldie and that old hag-the muscles are just gristle-doesn’t mean she’s strong.

  26. Sprmcandy

    Let me suck that & I’ll die happy !!

  27. Melissa Munster

    There’s no nipple visible on this picture, and obviously the star was placed too high on the boob. I think someone needs to see a girl naked first… Fish?
    Also, anatomy classes work better than trying to trick intelligent readers like us!

  28. paula

    umm no theres no nipple showing, not even close, not even a little!!!!!

  29. me

    yeah, definitely not a nipple in sight..it’s her arm in the shadows…it would be physically impossible to relocate a nipple up that far

  30. vanessa

    it’s scary that the fish knows so little about the female form that he is now seeing phantom nipple shadows.

  31. XX

    Wow, I didn’t realize the loose skin near one’s armpit qualifies as a nipple, boob, or even worth being censored and NSFW. Stupid me. LOL

  32. nosztalgikus

    I love Goldie Hawn :)

  33. Juli

    Ummm….that’s not a nipple. Just thought I’d point that out. It’s clearly just the concave little area where her tit meets her armpit.

  34. EuroNeckPain

    The light is not flattering. These women should wear thighs, bony legs are not pleasant to look at. Both of them. And the oldest one should consider wearing something that covers a bit more, even if she is still very good looking.
    These old hollywood exhibitionists missed the point: older people cover their bodies more, not because they are uglier looking, but because they are wiser.

  35. Zorro

    It’s a little known fact that Goldie had an accident while filming “Wildcats”. Wesley Snipes was trying to catch a ball and crashed into Goldie, his finger tearing her right tit. Plastic surgery wasn’t what it is today, and the surgeon reattached her nipple about three inches too high. All true.

    Either that, or this “nipple” is a shadow. Asshat.

  36. ThaOne

    That is soooooooo not her freaking nipple my god…..wtf

  37. ThaOne

    THAT IS SO NOT A NIPPLE….ARE THEY SERIOUS?

  38. GLADIATOR

    Goldie Hawn … is … goldie horrible

    I never liked any of her movies. I find her a totally horrible actress ….

    Come and join the short and easy game mybrute:

    http://burpnassker.mybrute.com

  39. Be careful Next time

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  40. Richard Milhaus Narlian

    Goldie has more class than yo mama,you HOLE

  41. jason

    dude ur retarded thats not a nipple wtf you suck has a web master

  42. SHAMOON KALVERT

    please goldie hawn youve earnt a lot of money but please give some money to your friend so that he can ejaculate in your mouth for the next 20 years in your mouth four times aday

  43. SHAMOON KALVERT

    please goldie hawn youve earnt a lot of money but please give some money to your friend so that he can ejaculate in your mouth for the next 20 years in your mouth four times aday

  44. SHAMOON KALVERT

    please goldie hawn youve earnt a lot of money but please give some money to your friend so that he can ejaculate in your mouth for the next 20 years in your mouth four times aday

  45. SHAMOON KALVERT

    please goldie hawn youve earnt a lot of money but please give some money to your friend so that he can ejaculate in your mouth for the next 20 years in your mouth four times aday

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