Goldie Hawn’s nipple not as horrifying as you might think

May 4th, 2009 // 141 Comments

Here’s Goldie Hawn attending a party at the Gramercy Park Hotel and, holy crap, that’s some old lady nip. Anyone else surprisingly not offended by this? Me either. Also, I’m now 100% certain Kate Hudson is not her daughter. I’m sorry, ha ha, nice little gag there, Goldie, but it’s honesty time: You stole her from an orphanage. Not that I’m judging your or anything, I just want some truth, dammit! — Or more nip. Whichever works.

NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions that might be a catalyst to evaluate just how much you like your boss. Didn’t he eat your lunch once? Just sayin’.

Photos: Splash News

  1. sdads


  2. Charlie E

    What’s with you forgetting to take the censor stars off the linked photos???

  3. Have you ever been dinosaur surfing?

    I still see that stupid pink star.. Or maybe that’s your asshole?

  4. Shallow Val

    Please take the stars off the big version. K thx. What can I say? I’m a masochist.

  5. nikki


  6. Geoff

    Isn’t that Liv Tyler with her?

  7. Boheeber

    That nip looks EXACTLY like a star! Incredible!!

  8. cass

    that is a shadow not a nipple …

  9. mark

    It’s sad that you are too retarded to run your own website.

  10. I'd rather not

    If that’s a nipple, it’s in a very odd place

  11. .

    I think Kate just got unlucky and inherited some recessive flat chest genes. I’m very happy I grew natural perky Ds : )

  12. Master Po

    Yo where da white girl’s nipple at?

  13. Brandon

    Maybe it’s not horrifying because it’s not showing.

  14. Randal

    Goldie is a true classic, who paved the way for other big celebrities who send in their pictures to The FISH, as well as the future bunnies of Playboy.

    Congratulations on being such a big and bright star in the entertainment industry. Everything you’ve touched has turned to gold!


  15. JPRichardson

    NO NIPPLE!!!

  16. Vince Lombardi

    I’m very envious of Goldie. She got to hold hands with Liv Tyler.

  17. Anon

    That is NOT her nipple.
    It’s old lady armpit chunks at a weird angle with dim lighting.

    not nipple

  18. Im Hot

    hey stupid people, you have to click the full size to view it w/o stars…douches

  19. denne

    definitely not nipple…

  20. Kitty

    Theres no nipple there! Fish have you ever seen a real breast? A nipple would never be that high up. Nipples are located at the fullest part of the breast just above where it starts to curve under.

  21. What a drag getting old, who ever the real god is have some strange sense of humor!

  22. Goldie loved Mel

    Hey I’m pretty sure Goldie got implants at some point. In her earlier movies she’s MUCH flatter chested. And thank you #18 for helping out the mouth breathers who can’t figure out that another little hand cursor means “click again, moron.”

  23. cary

    i agree..there is no nipple show at all..

  24. Jay

    Goldie has No nipple. She’s still a beautifful woman for a sexagenarian.

  25. Newcastle

    Nothing to see here, major FAIL.

  26. joho777

    I think that Goldie Hawn still looks pretty good.

    Even though there ISN’T a nipple showing in these photos.

  27. Carlao

    Have you really seen a nipple in those pictures ? Really … you need glasses or a good blow job … those pictures are showing no nipples or breast at all … sorry !!!

  28. dew

    Even clicking beyond the stars doesn’t show much nipple. It’s only the upper outline, maybe about 1/8 -1/4 inch. Wooo, Superficial gets excited over nip outlines LOL

  29. Jeremy

    Dude, at her age she has a nice set of tits. Now those are some healthy jugs man.

  30. There’s at least half a nip. Look closer, people.

    Also: niiiiiiiiiice.

  31. Randal, I will cut you like a bitch

  32. huh?

    weak…your trying too hard…i was expecting to get hard but oh well..

  33. a

    for everyone who says the site owners a retard, YOU, my friends, are the mental ones.
    you have to click the pictures more than once to get the big, uncensored version

  34. Teef

    Haha, I think fish’s nippleometer is broken, thar be no nips here

  35. There’s no nipple there. Have you people running this site ever even seen a chick’s nipple?

  36. Uh… unless her nipple is in her armpit like a manatee’s… then thats NOT A NIPPLE!!! Cumooon, perspective much!!!

  37. bootz

    I live right next to the Grammercy park hotel. Its right next to the school for the blind. this leads me to believe that somehow, somewhere, there is a god.

  38. SoTe

    I’m not sure why people fail to see it but yup, that IS a nipple.

  39. Crabby Old Guy

    Nipple/Schnipple you know that she’s what? Like 85-years old, right?

    You get me a shot of Jenna Fischer’s nipples and we’ll talk.

  40. vera

    I can’t believe people are debating whether or not those are implants when you can clearly see the huge shiny implant scars on her right one.

  41. Jameberlin

    There is no nipple there, she’d have some fucked up tits if her nipple was clear up to her armpit.

    @# 40. Those are stretchmarks, NOT Implant scars.

  42. G I L F

    Click on my name!!!!

  43. tromba


  44. poop

    where the HELL do you think the nipple is?
    there is nothing there

    the nipple is further down,
    go watch some porn
    moron ;)

  45. Dr McNasty

    I want to see NIPPLE.

    STARZ are in DA WAY!!!!!11
    LOLZ wtf

  46. Birthday

    There is no nipple to be found in the NSFW version. Even if Goldie Hawn were 35 years younger than she is, that would be a freakishly high place to find a nipple.

  47. Eat Shit

    Fish = Fucking retard

  48. justifiable

    Clearly armpit crease. Jeezus, go feed your seeing eye dog, Fishguy.

  49. but when she smiles……………………………………………..HIDE, quick!!

  50. L Diggs

    You have to click the big picture again to see the uncensored pic you idiots.

Leave A Comment