GOLDEN GLOBES: The people who weren’t Christina Hendricks’ breasts.

January 18th, 2010 // 68 Comments

And now for a look at celebrities who attended last night Golden Globes but didn’t have stupid huge breasts like Christina Hendricks therefore rendering them dead to me:

Christina Aguilera with her rapidly shrinking chesticles. (Stop. Working. Out.)
Halle Berry whose chest has probably sold 85 billion copies of Swordfish. To me.
January Jones. You still don’t know who this is.
Chloe Sevigny: Sponsored by Swiffer.
Olivia Wilde who kind of phoned this one in. Let’s be honest.
Maggie Gyllenhaal. I’m pretty sure she was only there to shank Reese Witherspoon.
Fergie and her life partner Josh Duhamel. One day your union will be legal!
Sandra Bullock who dared to play a Christian woman who loves football, in America. That’s adversity.
Jon Hamm sporting a beard which will eventually be shaved to an impeccable stubble making me you question your my sexuality. — Wait.
Robert Downey Jr. who fucking owned the place and from now on should give everyone’s acceptance speech. For everything.

Photos: Getty, WENN
superficial

  1. Caleb

    Man, I wish Christina would put on 5 or 10 pounds so she didn’t have those weird Paris Hilton armpits. She’s sexy though.

  2. Irving

    Did anyone else remember that Robert Downey Jr. was in Weird Science?

  3. Anon

    @52 – I remember! Haha.

    Robert Downey Jr. is so attractive it’s sort of ridiculous. I don’t like the stupid Iron Man facial hair, though. And his acceptance speech was definitely the best of the night. Also, I love Christoph Waltz but he probably made the worst one.

  4. T Gabone

    @2
    I asked myself the same question until i saw this;
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jnrnAfoYMA&feature=channel

    How does that not get your dick hard?

  5. sweat girl,so hot

  6. She is truly gorgeous I must say. Looking cute in that hair style and specially nose which had plastic surgery I think . She is having truly appealing beauty. Thanks.

  7. Christina is BACK!
    I cant believe it

  8. gigi

    RDJr looks way too yummy…. Not sure what the fuss is over the Don Draper guy tho…. I guess not being a part of the Mad Men hype — I just started watching seasons 1 & 2 the other day on some free chinese site so I guess I’m immune… the dude who plays Cosgrove tho, is smoking hot in a slavic/russian mob way…

  9. gay dude from Seinfeld

    to #15: ‘ WHO! WHO DOESN’T WANT TO WEAR THA RRRREEEBON!?”

  10. OK

    CHRISTINA AGUILERA FINALLY LOOKS PRETTY..THE DRESS CAN GO BUT HER MAKEUP LOOKS GOOD COMPARED TO THE RED CLOWN LIPSTICK SHE ALWAYS WEARS….GIRLS ARE SO MUCH PRETTIER NATURAL LOOKING …VERY PRETTY

  11. Mandi

    Christina A. looks beautiful!! The dress, jewlery, hair, make-up.. everything! So, so, classy and elegant. Gorgeous!

  12. Jon Osterman

    Re: Jon Hamm

    Has anyone made a Billy Mays joke yet? ‘Cause I thought he died.

    But seriously…my internet is not allowing me to see the RDjr video yet, so I can’t comment on that. But those pictures…he totally enjoys what he does, doesn’t he? That’s awesome. Great actor and from what I’ve read and interviews and such seems like a great person. Glad the drugs didn’t destroy him like it almost seemed they would those years ago.

  13. Maximus

    Tell my again why anyone actually cares about Maggie Gyllenhaal…

  14. Rogue Cuckold

    I would love to watch Christina being banged by her black studs! Then I would perform any tongue duties she required!

  15. you are right .very nice

  16. TRUTH
    Commented on this photo:

    FINALLY. Her recent weight gain was such a painful 6 months for me, glad it’s over. The long bleached hair, red lipstick and thunder thigh tights BE GONE!

  17. God is Black
    Commented on this photo:

    That gaze of hers could cut through steel………….

  18. browny
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh i loooooooooooooooooove the beard. Sex on legs.

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