Gisele Bundchen is a shoe salesman

October 4th, 2007 // 116 Comments

Today is maybe the slowest news day ever, so here’s Gisele Bundchen in Melbourne, Australia launching her new Ipanema shoe collection for Novo. Although calling these things shoes is a stretch. They’re more like flip flops. Ugly flip flops. You’d think a supermodel would be better at this. Well, no, I guess that’s not true. The only thing you’d expect a supermodel to be good at is not eating and trying to read books upside down.


  1. I hate people

    Also what is lamé? Is that french for lame? Because you can also use the words ‘Leonardo Dicaprio’ as a synonym for lame.

    Anyshit there is not enough money in this world to pay me to stand in a hideous slut bikini next to some egocentric man faced amazonian bitch in five inch heels and a fancy gown, man that must be a humiliating job.

    Really looking at these chicks and Manchend she’s not any hotter she’s just wearing more expensive somewhat classy crap and is covered in the usual stench of moderate fame that would empress and attract impressionable asskissing fame worshiping losers, you know the ones that hang around this celeb trashing site to come to the defense of the worthless hollywood attention whores.

  2. kate

    I think she looks like a man. Great bod. Man face.

  3. AlwaysRight

    #19. You are right about that! That’s something else that is annoying…overrated asses. Do girls with poor asses just don’t know it? ie: She’s prancing around at a major publicity event in small bikini bottoms. Does no one have the heart to tell her so? How does one such bad, flat ass get hired for such an event? Sorry girls, flat and small just doesn’t cut it. She looks like she has a short crack too…yucky…

    p.s. Hey modeling agencies! Stop hiring the fuglies!!!

  4. You’re saying she’s near-sighted?

  5. kate

    Good hair too.

    But still, manface.

  6. VilliersDeL'IsleAdam

    “DURRRRR! Sh– sh– sho-o-o-o-o-es.”

    Looks like Gisele’s got some shoes in her mand. I’m still not going to guy them. Not even if they’re male ordered.

  7. My granny says they are awesome and that everyone at the ‘home’ are wearin them. She says ‘flip flop’ are for kids under 50 years old. These are plain old(ie fugly) real practical sandals already found at your local Wal Mart.

  8. kate

    But she’s dating my man so maybe I’m biased.

    Ya, no. Manface.

  9. AlwaysMoreRight

    Hey, AlwaysRight, that brunette is prettier than Gisele, and her butt is just fine. Women aren’t supposed to have muscular, protruding buttocks like the ones behind the glory hole in your favorite bathhouse. Maybe you would change teams for Kim Kardashian?

  10. threearmedman

    Hands down THE most beautiful girl around today.

    She created the look of the 21st century.

  11. She’s too conceited. I hope somebody slices off one of her nipples and sews it to her eyeball.

  12. Jimbo, that’s gross.

    Trollicide is the only answer here.

  13. I normally don;t mind the ladies being taller then me because it leaves me at boob level. But the problem with the supermodels is that they don’t have boobs. The irony is biting.

  14. okByMe

    If that woman tried to seduce me wearing those shoes then I’d let her. I have no foot fetishes. I’d look in her in the eye to make sure she was serious and then I’d be between her legs looking for ovaries. Tom Brady is so lucky.

  15. She doesn’t have overly large hands and her Adam’s Apple is barely visible. Plus she reportedly has a huge cock. What’s not to like?

  16. eeks

    She has always screamed “Tranny!” to me

  17. nick

    someone should tell the poor girls that shoes are worn on the feet..not on the hands..dont they have assistants who can tell then this? …hmmmm
    alsowhy isnt she wearing a pair herself? oh sorry I forgot…its cheap plastic shit…i will wear my 8000 dollar stilettos and the common muck can wear my rubbish shoes


  19. Screaming tranny, get it?

  20. NoDickNoWay

    The only dick Gisele has got is the one her luck guy’s put in her. If she’s a tranny then I’m ready to do my first man.

  21. Rick

    Gisele Bundchen, per Forbes magazine, is the richest supermodel in the world with a net worth (thru July 2007) of slightly over 150 million dollars. She is arguably already worth another 15 million, since she is equally adept at not only designing shoes, lingerie, but is talented in real estate. Among her holdings are a country home in NY, penthouse (NYC) and executive hotel in Brazil. She currently is designing her own lingerie line with one of the largest mfrs. in the world, H&M. Her Ipanema shoe collection debuted in 2001, in which she designed many of the styles, again per Forbes, as of July 2007 has sold over 100 million pairs. Bundchen, at 27, is certifiable in the business world as a genius and is incredibly hardworking. She recently sold her Beverly Hills home for a 3 mill profit and her other penthouse (she has 2) in NYC is listed at 10.9 mill, which will show a 8 mill profit if sold for that amount.

  22. Ok, she’s somewhat attractive for a dude, but she still annoys me. I’d give her a handjob and then start pumping so frantically that I rip her cock out by the roots.

  23. veggi

    So Rick, what does the inside of her rectum look like?

  24. Rick

    @73: Mmmph, mmmph . . . (Damn it! How do I get my head out of her ass, now that it’s in here???)

  25. ssdd

    For some reason this guy can’t stand up straight. Ugly. Pic 6 looks like a wide adams apple moment to me. She/He reminds me of Ugly Jessica Biel.

  26. wedgeone

    I’d fuck her, but it’d be really hard not to slap her around.

  27. #65, go back under your rock dumbass

  28. Smush

    ugly over rated horse face.

  29. AlwaysRight

    Hey #59, I didn’t say anything about her face. With that being said, I agree that she is (slightly) prettier than Giselle, even though she is still average in that department as well as the ass department. Her butt is “JUST fine” and that is the problem It is not great, nor even good. If that’s all the better you get then I feel sorry for you. I also didn’t say I wouldn’t hit it once or twice, butt it’s definately AVERAGE at best.

    The point I was trying to make is that very average girls with average faces and bodies get hired as models and then paraded around like they are God’s gift. Why in the hell would you stand up for them?

  30. KamUK

    Note she’s not wearing those shoes herself.

  31. igroovin

    ummm…she always sticks u butt out. why? she looks like the average joe. if she werent tall and skinny i dont think she’d be cat walkin.

  32. Catherine

    I never thoght she was hot and i dont know how Rolling stone called her the hottest girl in the world being as she lacks any femine curves in her body

  33. freakwad

    her knee looks jacked up in picture 2!! weird…

  34. shosho

    i dont find her hot atttt all!!!

  35. Dr.

    #71. Rick are you her publicist because you sure kiss ass like one.

    I don’t know what you are trying to prove with that post but it certainly doesn’t make her anymore appealing. So she’s rich. Yeah that’s such an admirable thing to be in this world you know what with all the starving kids, third world poverty diseases and social causes that need funding. all you’ve proven is that Gisele is another filthy rich greedy celebrity and don’t bother posting her charitable donations because they are NOTHING compared to the massive wealth she squanders and keeps for herslef. It’s not just about what you give it;s about how you live and this manwhore lives a life of pure greed. Only the true scroodges and worthless gluttons of the world live in homes that cost millions. The fact that she is a greed filled celebrity who actually thinks it’s acceptable to live in mansions while children die all over the world on the floors of shacks just makes this nasty bitches fug man face even fucking uglier.

    And there is NO WAY IN HELL she is a genius. Absolutely no fucking way on earth. Because a genius would be smart enough and morally minded enough to not live like a filthy greedy glutton with million dollar homes and 10,000 dollar outfits. Most of all geniuses don’t design swimwear, because they’re a little too busy trying to oh I don’t make an actual difference and accomplish something that actually matters. It’s a sick, sick world these greedy attention whores live in and their vapid lives are meanlingless and do not make any kind of valuable contribution to a world that is truely in need.

    My wife was given the chance to be a model but she has too much respect for herself and actually really enjoys using her brain and amking a difference.

    Gisele Bundchen and her fug face are exactly what is worng with this world.
    She’s just fucking useless.

  36. jacknasty

    pic 11 = HOT DAMN!!!

  37. *


  38. shoe-friend

    I have a pair of her slippers which are very popular in Singapore, they are extremly comfortable. Good material and they are quiet when you walk. I would buy a few more ,even if they didn’t have her endorsement on it.

  39. jellyhead

    bitch is fug

  40. cj

    1st of all stop hating b*tches gisele is the sexiest white girl on this planet! and im not a lesbian so back off but if i was you better believe id have me a bad b*tch like that on my arm no doubt she aint even stacked like that but she working with what she got and doin a damn good job

  41. jellyhead

    cj you are entitled to you opinion as am i and i must say thats the sexiest white tranny on the planet

  42. nick

    is rick her business manager? why does he ramble on about how much money she has…is that the american way of saying..she is great! she has money! respect her!? damn that sad

  43. five rivers

    who is this fat cow?

  44. steph

    THE FUCK?!

  45. yukadoozer

    If she were waving that shoe in her size it would of knocked her over.
    And she is losing her looks-she could be Sarah Jessica Parkers better looking cousin.

  46. FromOutOfNoWhere

    What is it with beautiful women. Why do they try to things other then look hot. They try to sing, write books, sell shoes, cook and it always the same, a disaster Beautiful women need to focus on what they do best, looking hot. Forget the rest. get married, stay at home, take care of hubby. When hubby comes home bring him a beer and his slippers, offer him a blow job to ease the stress from a hard days work. Have your hot fine sister or best friend prepare dinner while you’re at it, parade around the room in front of hubby in lingerie and sexy body hugging outfits and in the nude. Then both of you snuggle up and go to sleep in his arms in bed after some late night threesome exercises.

    The life, as it should be.

  47. It’s a man, baby! (And I usually like her :( Very disappointing)

  48. lg

    She picked some rather unflattering postures for the camera — now SHE looks pregnant. Or is she? Maybe I missed it. On the other hand, I couldn’t care less. Why am I even commenting?

  49. sue

    EXTREMELY SEXY…that matters the most when snagging the hottest men in the world??? GET IT FUCKFACES???

  50. jrzmommy

    she’s so a guy.

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