Gerard Butler Hates Himself For Losing Jessica Biel

When we last left Gerard Butler, fellow cokehead Lindsay Lohan was convinced she could get him to star in a Lifetime movie with her, and things really haven’t improved since then because apparently he sits around now sulking about how he got to have sex with Jessica Biel without marrying her. It’s like living in a prison. Radar Online reports:

Gerard, 42, was scared off by Jessica wanting something more serious when they filmed the romantic comedy, so he bolted – a decision he now regrets.
“Gerard doesn’t have many regrets but not treating Jessica with the respect she deserved while they dated is one of them,” a source close to the 300 star revealed.
“He genuinely believes she was the one that got away.

Two Things:

1. On Gerard Butler’s tag page, if you scroll down to the post about him banging Jessica Biel, notice how it’s the very last story right before he starts looking like heroin on a stick and banging Real Housewives for an entire week with absolutely zero recollection. So maybe there’s some truth to this story because, seriously, how else do you react to this situation? Which brings me to:

2. Is Gerard Butler actually crying about not getting married and being forced to spend his days plowing whoever he wants, whenever he wants in Porta-potties? Because there are people who would kill for that kind of life. Or write Santa a letter each year asking for it. (I don’t like blood.)

Photos: INFdaily, Splash News