“And then I say, ‘My plan, Mr. Bond?’ and then you make the words pop up behind me. Okay, quick, here he comes.”
On Tuesday, every nerd on the Internet found himself with a curious erection after George Lucas announced that he sold Lucasfilm to Disney for $4.05 billion who then announced they’re releasing a new Star Wars movie in 2015 which is apparently still about Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia if the heads up Lucas gave Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher is any indication. Anyway, the biggest joke was what the hell does George Lucas need $4.05 billion for? Except now we all get to feel like dicks because it turns out he’s going to use it all to fund educational charities. Whoops. Via The Hollywood Reporter:
“For 41 years, the majority of my time and money has been put into the company,” Lucas said in a statement Wednesday. “As I start a new chapter in my life, it is gratifying that I have the opportunity to devote more time and resources to philanthropy.”
Apparently while no one was looking, George Lucas made some sort of Giving Pledge in 2010 to improve education in America or else we’re all going to die in a CGI lava pit, is how I assume he put it:
“I am dedicating the majority of my wealth to improving education. It is the key to the survival of the human race. We have to plan for our collective future—and the first step begins with social, emotional, and intellectual tools we provide to our children.”
“And now for an adorable clip from The Phantom Menace where an alien space camel farts in the face of Jar Jar Binks, a horribly racist character I came up with to shill more action figures because children are our future. Meesa love this part!” Yup, this guy’s gonna save humanity good. I feel better already.