The Superficial Wants to Botox You in the Face – Officially Ends!

November 23rd, 2008 // 946 Comments

****NO LONGER TAKING SUBMISSIONS****

Alright, guys, huge thanks for competing in our Botox giveway. Once we sift through this gargantuan pile of comments, we’ll be posting the winning caption right here on the site. In the meantime, feel free to scope out what your fellow readers came up with – or maybe even hook them up with the name of a good therapist. Just sayin’.

Thanks again to everyone that submitted a caption!

****NO LONGER TAKING SUBMISSIONS****

With the holiday season rapidly approaching, nobody cares more about you looking awesome than The Superficial. No, really, that’s science. Which is why we’re offering you a chance to win $500 towards Botox treatment at a physician near you. (And, sorry, Sharon Stone, you can’t use it on your son’s feet..)

Starting Monday, Nov. 24 until 12 PM PST Monday, Dec. 1, here’s all you gotta do to enter:

1. Come up with a caption for the top photo.
2. Post it in the comment section along with a valid e-mail address which will NOT be published or used to sell you Mexican Viagra.
3. Think happy thoughts.

From there our crack team will pick the best caption with the winner receiving the aforementioned Botox goodness. To sweeten the pot, the winner will also be eligible to appear in a before/after post on The Superficial which, let’s be real, kicks the crap out of winning the lottery. (Don’t want your beautiful mug plastered on the Internet? No problem. We’ll still give you the free Botox. Who loves ya?)

Let the Games Begin!

Photos: Flynet
superficial

  1. bakinmycake

    See, my farts do smell like roses

  2. ali

    this is interesting.

  3. ChuckleHead

    I am not posting a caption for the top photo. The Superficial is not getting my real e-mail address.

    Haha suckers!

  4. Will

    I would sit down… but there’s nothing to sit on.

  5. J-Heezy

    Nothing tickles more… than crabs on your thighs

  6. Will

    I would sit down… but there’s nothing to sit on.

  7. J-Heezy

    Nothing tickles more… than crabs on your thighs

  8. Spinner

    Paris immediately regretted speaking out on her urinary incontinence and agreeing to be the new spokeswoman for Depends.

  9. Cassie

    Tip slip!

  10. Clayton Hough

    “I think I just leaked” chough@palms.net

  11. Max Planck

    I think I lost my ben wa ball? Have you seen it?

  12. Vinnie MIchaels

    Paris: ooooo…..i gotta pee so bad
    Girl on right looking at Paris’ crotch…..too late.

  13. Jonnie Wondernose

    See, girls? It looks just like that guy’s armpit!

  14. Candace Cockrell

    “Let’s all get high and look at my vagina”

  15. ChuckleHead

    Instead of, “From there our crack team”… the Fishes post should read, “From there our team on crack”

  16. it's only monday

    That’s it …just keep smiling Paris, maybe no one will realize you just SHAT yourself….

  17. Shae

    I just let one rip, That’s Hot!

  18. Somebody

    “Sorry, haven’t shaved my kitty in a while…a Loooong while. Go HIPPIES!” (yanks out hairy fur ball between thighs)

  19. Hobbes531

    Paris Hilton – “See, Girls Poop Too!!”

  20. kiki

    Move your head, bitch. You’re blockin my upskirt.

  21. Maverick

    I’m sorry, but I think I just got Herpes on your seat.

  22. Max Planck

    Sure you can borrow it, but it’ll need fresh batteries.

  23. havoc

    Damn, that was a good burrito…..

    .

  24. Cathy Lewis

    Yes, I did have the chili. Why?

  25. DD

    Do you want to be my new BFF?
    We can wear silly headbands together.

  26. Cathy Lewis

    Yes, I did have the chili. Why?

  27. Jenna

    Paris Hilton taking a dump in the back of a convertible, thanks to botox, you can’t even see her face straining.

  28. ashley

    Oops, I just farted…

  29. wade

    the only kind of sex paris should be having is with a senso ring.

  30. blp

    No thanks, only thing I need botox on is my wrinkly balls

  31. Ted Kennedy's tumor

    ” I think I just queefed”

  32. Tina Fey Was Right, Paris IS a Tranny!

  33. Jackeffinnasty

    I have to pee!! Can somebody shove a fire hose up my pussy? Why? It’s the only drainage thingy that won’t fall out.

  34. al riezgo

    Annnnd this is what it’ll look like when you reach my age…..yeah the curtains tend to get a bit tattered…what can I say, it’s a occupational hazard.

  35. Tina Fey Was Right, Paris IS a Tranny!

  36. Julie M

    got malibu barbie? stiff arms and legs, fake tan, plastic face and a fabulous 80′s outfit!

    ::::::GO SHORTY, GO SHORTY, we’re gonna party like it’s your birthday!!!::::::::

    ooops. wrong rapper guy. my bad.

  37. Tim

    Good evening, I’m Pocahontas and I’ll be your cocktail waitress.

  38. Daniel

    “Paris Hilton has gremlin face-widening surgery”

  39. ashcrack

    i’m so sorry, i accidentally just did your boyfriend. happy birthday.

  40. Joe

    Ooops! I just sat on Benji!

  41. richelle

    I’ve got a mangina!

  42. Tinkerbelll…..time to come out now…

  43. Anthony Battista

    Rich young chick: What’s that smell?
    Paris: What smell?
    Rich young chick: And why is there a flock of seagulls following you?
    Paris: Oh no! I forgot my panties again, RUN!!!

  44. Stephen Bellotti

    Paris Hilton attempts to demonstrate the nationality of her new boyfriend Nick.

  45. Chris

    I love showing you young girls how to unscrew the top of a big pickle jar with just your va-jay-jay. That vinegar smell is the pickles girls, and not the industrial strength crotch clean that the Superficial Writer likes to sniff so much. Opps, maybe I’m wrong! Stand back, watch your eyes, careful of the fumes. Damn that crotch clean and its minor side affects, you girls should be able to see again in a couple days….sorry..hehehe

  46. Katie Delmonico

    Paris Hilton attempts to demonstrate the nationality of her new boyfriend Nick.

  47. Josh

    Like, you guys wanna see something REALLY gross?

  48. TER

    “Hey girls look! I tricked the Superficial Guy, no couchie tonight, I am wearing panties!”

  49. Anthony B

    Rich young chick: What’s that smell?
    Paris: What smell?
    Rich young chick: And why is there a flock of seagulls following you?
    Paris: Oh no! I forgot my panties again, RUN!!!

  50. Megan York Parker

    Why, yes, I do have crabs. How sweet of you to notice!

    Alternately:

    This headband is holding on my weave, gals! Shhh…

Leave A Comment